


Change of fate

by Aeron12



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Depression, Difficult Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Force Bond, Gray Jedi, It will follow the canon story only different, It will happen just not right away, Kylo Ren is good, Kylo Ren still leans towards the dark, Mommy and Daddy Issues, Mutual Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance, Slow Burn, Smut, Sort Of, They both don't understand emotions, They try to understand each other but can't, alternative universe, canon divergence after TFA, just because they're space wizards doesn't mean they don't suffer PTSD, they need to figure each other first before they can be together
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:14:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 74,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21715954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aeron12/pseuds/Aeron12
Summary: What if Ben Solo hadn’t gone to Snoke when Luke learned of the darkness in his nephew? Follow as Ben, a smuggler in Hosnian prime who goes by the name of Kylo. He tries his best to forget his past and live a normal life as he possibly can only to be dragged back into it all when his friend Poe goes missing on a mission for the Resistance. Rescue his friend then get out, that was the plan. However, the closer Ben gets to fray, the harder the darkness pulls at him, leaving him with the most unlikely individual to anchor him. Will he be tempted by the darkness that is consuming him slowly, or will he become the Jedi he was meant to be?
Relationships: Finn/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Zorii Bliss/Poe Dameron
Comments: 97
Kudos: 256





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to my Star Wars story, I'm really excited about this one! This story has honestly been in my mind for a long time seeing as I haven't seen anyone do something similar. Anyways, I just have a few things I need to say in regards to the story before you start reading. You can skip over this if you don't want any information and want to go in without knowing anything.
> 
> So, as you know, this story is canon divergent but it's also, cannon compliant you'll just need to read on to get my meaning. So as the synopsis says, Kylo Ren didn't join the First Order when Luke tried to kill him and that, of course, has had a few repercussions. However, everything else is pretty much the same. Lastly, this will be a Rey/Kylo Ren story, though it will be a slow burn, you just gotta be patient! I'm not a big fan of Kylo/Ben becoming really sappy out of nowhere, in canon his character is one that feels a lot of emotions, but he keeps them all bottled up and I wouldn't expect any different in love. He's the type of character that wouldn't say I love you, but that doesn't mean he doesn't. This being said he needs to figure a lot out before he can start falling in love with Rey, and so does Rey, despite the force bond in this story. 
> 
> Well, that was everything from me, so read and enjoy!

“Jakku? Why the hell are you going to that wasteland?” A deep male voice asked barely hearable with the loud techno music blasting from various speakers.

This was Hosnian prime, such loud music would usually be frowned upon by the citizens of Republic City, but this is a bar and one of the most popular ones in the entire galaxy at that. 

The bar is large, and filled with people humanoid and non-humanoid alike, as well as the droids that handed people their drinks and did various jobs. There were booths by the walls, all of them occupied by boisterous groups of wealthy and non-wealthy alike. In the middle of every table, there laid a hologram of a dancer, or of a sporting event happening somewhere in the galaxy. People cheered at the events, or looked at the dancers, mesmerized, especially the men who were captivated by their beauties despite being mere projections. The bar itself was stationed in the middle, people from different races sitting by it while drinking, eating, and laughing leisurely.

The lights in the bar were dim, except for the few lights flashing from the walls and onto the floor. Alcohol stained the floor, and if one looked close enough there were even blots of dried blood both old and new from previous brawls. 

As to the people in attendance, everyone present had more or less the same appearance, with lavish, colourful clothing and deep pockets for alcohol and entertainment. This is Hosnian’s most popular bar after all. 

Almost everyone was drunk, uncaring of what was happening around them, as they danced, talked and enjoyed themselves. However, not all were like that. By the corners of the bar, and by the furthest walls there were a few individuals who stood out despite being shrouded by shadows. They, unlike the other people present, wore dark worn-out clothes with a blaster strapped to their waist. They mostly stood apart, and kept to themselves, keeping a wary eye on their surroundings as they drank. Naturally, they were all different and yet they had something in common, their tired and mistrustful eyes trained on those who behaved like there wouldn’t be a tomorrow. 

The year is 34 ABY, the war between the New Republic and the First Order is ongoing, which means that these are dangerous times and while some can afford to be careless others cannot. None knew this more than the two men sitting in a booth in a dark corner of the bar, their faces barely visible in the shadows. 

“Mission,” responded one of the men, taking a drink from the glass in front of him. 

The man was a little tall, with wavy dark brown, neck length hair. His eyes were the same colour as his hair. For clothes, he wore a brown jacket with a white shirt underneath it. He wore brown pants with a holster and blaster strapped to his waist. On the side of his coat there stood proudly the resistance symbol glinting from the lights. When it comes to physical appearances he is rather handsome, especially with his half-smile and eyes that sparkled with confidence. From his uniform, and his cocky disposition it was clear to all who looked at him that this man is a Resistance pilot. 

“I figured, who would go to Jakku on their own volition?” Asked the other man who rested his hand lazily on the rim of his glass. 

This man was taller than the other one, above average in fact. His hair was jet black and far longer than the other man’s. His clothes were similar to the other man’s, but his jacket was black instead of brown and so was the shirt underneath it, not to mention that his jacket bore no symbol. Much like everyone else, he had a blaster strapped to his waist. He is a handsome man, but while the other man appeared more rugged his complexion was smooth and almost young, made specially by his soft long hair that was pushed back. 

The man with brown hair put down his drink and smirked at his friend with amusement. 

“Why not? heard Jakku is nice this time of year.”

The other man rolled his eyes unamused. He grabbed the glass in front of him and took a large gulp of his drink, finishing it in one go. 

“Seriously, why Jakku?” The raven-haired asked his friend, grimacing a little from the burn of the drink and looking up. 

The other man shrugged. 

“Sorry Kylo, that’s confidential, I already told you too much as it is. This is supposed to be a super-secret mission if the General finds out I told someone, she’ll have my neck”

Kylo visibly tensed at the mention of the General, knowing full well who Poe meant, but he didn’t say anything on that matter. 

“Right, all the more reason you shouldn’t go.” 

Poe leaned back on the booth, and put his hands behind his head, adopting a more relaxed posture.

“Relax mom,” he teased with an overconfident smile.

Kylo huffed, and leaned back on his seat, folding his legs. 

His friend’s overconfidence irked him, and he made it known on many occasions, but Poe either didn’t notice or didn’t care. Honestly, at the pace he’s going he’ll get blown up in a mission one day. Everyone told him so, but Poe’s always been like that even in the academy. Headstrong and unaware of his mortality, but hey that’s one of the things that make him an interesting person to hang around, much better than his coworkers. 

“Can’t you at least give me a clue? You dragged me all the way here on my day off to tell me you got some super-secret mission and you won’t even give me a miserable clue?” He huffed.

Poe kept looking at him not at all convinced, he appeared amused in fact. 

Kylo huffed once more and leaned forward a little.

“Come on, you’ve known me since the academy, it’s not like I’m gonna blab to the First Order.” 

Poe still didn’t look convinced as he crossed his arms stubbornly. 

Kylo leaned back and shook his head knowing that there was no point, not when it came to Poe and his role in the resistance. 

You see, Poe is a Resistance pilot and the best one at that. For reasons unknown to him, seeing as his friend is as irresponsible as they come, Poe is a commander, a rank he supposed he achieved due to his sheer determination, fearlessness, and devotion. Yes, that had to be it. Because everyone knows that Poe, though he may be careless and headstrong, he’s fully committed to the resistance, he has been even before he joined it and when he was a simple student at the academy. As for Kylo, well he didn’t really understand his friend’s devotion to the rebel organization, not that he’s a First Order sympathizer either he just wanted to remain as far as possible from all that war bullshit. 

Neither spoke further on the matter as they continued to drink and talk about other things, ordering drinks every now and again. 

Time passed, and once people were starting to head out, and the robots began to clean everything and put the chairs and empty glasses away Kylo took a large gulp of what remained of his drink. 

“It’s getting late, I gotta fly some cargo to Coruscant early tomorrow,” Kylo grumbled, taking out some credits to pay for his drinks.

Poe looked at him in disbelief at the mention of his job.

“Still wasting your time with that job?” Asked Poe, taking out some credits of his own. 

Kylo didn’t look at his friend as he shrugged, and put the credits in the middle of the table. A small compartment instantly opened swallowing the credits and closing. A hologram of a beautiful twi'lek appeared thanking him but he didn’t even glance at it as he got up. 

“It’s not as glamorous as being a resistance pilot, but it’s honest work.” 

He watched as Poe paid for his drinks, and stood up. He was standing in front of him, looking at him exasperated. 

“Yea Yea I’ve heard the whole spiel before.” 

“Then why ask?” 

Poe leaned on the booth and crossed his arms.

“Simple, because you’re a great pilot and I hate watching you waste your life doing a job anyone can do.”

A moment of silence passed between them as Kylo looked at Poe for a brief second, then turned and left. He didn’t appear to be angry by his friend’s comment, but he did look annoyed. He wasn’t going to have this argument with Poe again, not today.

He vaguely heard Poe follow after him as they exited the bar. It was mostly empty at this point so it was easier to get through the large crowds of people. 

Once the doors slid open cold, fresh air instantly hit him, a complete contrast to the stuffy air inside the bar filled with the smell of sweat, alcohol and sex. 

Kylo closed his eyes for a brief second and took a deep breath.

He enjoyed the environment the bar offered, it allowed him to blow off some steam and not think about anything but the drink in front of him and the occasional girl that would come seeking him out. But there’s only so long one can keep themselves busy, reality always hits back no matter what.

Kylo didn’t look back at his friend as he began to walk away from the bar. Knowing that their get together was over. 

If Poe is headstrong, then he is difficult, or so people would say and he honestly doesn’t blame them for saying that. He’s not out here to make friends, he’s not out here to do much of anything but for whatever reason Poe seems to like him enough to be his friend and come visit him in his free time, why? He honestly wouldn’t know. Apparently, it has something to do with him speaking his mind, and not conforming to anything... or something along those lines. Regardless, it may have taken him a long time but he’s come to see Poe as a friend, but that doesn’t mean he’ll stand around and let him question his life decisions either. 

“Kylo… come on buddy,” Poe called, putting a hand on his shoulder, causing Kylo to stopped and turn. 

“You know I only say that cause you’re a good friend right?” He asked, unsure. “It really does baffle me how you’re still here wasting your life away.” 

Kylo rolled his eyes and made to turn but Poe’s grip tightened and he spoke up again. 

“look I’m not saying you should join the resistance, but at least get a better job. With your skills you could probably be a captain of some fancy cruiser, travelling around the galaxy to the most luxurious destinations. And hell if that isn’t for you then become a teacher at the academy, I’m sure they’ll accept you, what with your grades and all.” 

Kylo still didn’t say anything as he looked at his friend. He wanted to simply brush him off as he usually did with everyone else, but he knows Poe genuinely cares about him, for some reason, not to mention that he isn’t wrong. He could get a much better job, something that will at least let him pay off the hole he calls home and afford a better living, but there’s more to it than that, there always is.

“I don’t know how many times I have to repeat this,” Kylo huffed. “I like my job, it may not be much, but I prefer it over some big paying one with a lot of responsibilities.”

That was a big lie, and he knows that Poe knows it, but it’s the best he can do. There’s no way he could tell him the truth. He couldn’t tell anyone the truth.

Poe sighed and shook his head, looking disappointed but he appeared to let go of the matter as he let go of his shoulder and stepped back. 

“Well, at least you’re happy,” Poe conceded, and Kylo felt relieved that he wasn’t pressing on the matter as he usually did. 

“But anyway, I gotta go too, I’m supposed to report back at the station early in the morning.” 

Kylo nodded and his eyes softened a little as he looked at his friend. Poe may annoy him at times, and he sometimes wonders why he’s his friend, but one thing will always be true, he doesn’t want to see him get hurt. Unfortunately, that’s the nature of their lives, with neither one knowing when their time to kick the bucket will come and now with this unknown mission, this could very well be the last time he sees Poe, his only friend. 

“Gonna miss me?” Poe asked with a cocky smile, knowing what he was thinking.

Kylo snorted and shook his head.

“There isn’t much to miss, believe me.” 

Poe acted hurt but didn’t answer with a comeback as he usually did, instead he shook his head and gave him a genuine smile. 

“Well, may the force be with you then,” Poe said, and Kylo rolled his eyes. 

“You know I don’t believe in that superstitious shit,” he shot back but Poe merely smiled, and gave him a lazy salute as a goodbye. 

With that Poe turned and began to walk away, towards the crowds of people. However, before he disappeared he stopped and looked over his shoulder, and said something Kylo didn’t expect. 

“Luke Skywalker.” 

Time seemed to stop at the mention of that name.

Kylo’s reaction was instant as every bone in his body tensed up, his brows furrowing and his nose flaring. Flashes of a green lightsaber quickly flew past his memories, a burning temple, people screaming and begging for help, a dark voice encouraging him to give in to the darkness and participate in the massacre….

The same memories kept repeating over and over again, causing him to barely notice Poe talking again. 

“You said you wanted a clue right? Well there it is, now you can’t say I never tell you anything” 

Thankfully that snapped him out of his thoughts as he understood what Poe was referring to. Kylo shook his head and blinked rapidly before Poe noticed his reaction, and met his eyes once more. He quickly noticed that Poe was frowning, and looking at him worriedly. However, before he could ask Kylo shook his head again. 

“Nice to know the Resistance is wasting their time out searching for some fairy tale,” he scoffed jokingly, even though he was still shaken. 

Poe shrugged.

“Who knows man, sometimes fairy tales turn out to be real.”

And with that Poe smiled and disappeared behind the large crowd, not knowing how true his words were.

No one knew better than he that sometimes fairy tales do turn out to be true, but Kylo had enough experience to know that they were usually never how one would envision them. 

Kylo didn’t think too much on things as he turned and began to walk the other way, towards his home, trying his best to forget everything. 

_~ K~_

Kylo slid the broken door to his apartment softly, not wanting to disturb the sullustan landlady that lives across the hall. He’s behind on his rent by a month, and he didn’t want more trouble. 

The lights instantly lit up as he walked in, revealing a small space with a kitchen, bed, a hologram and not much else. The lights weren’t all working, some of them flickering, but it was enough to reveal the greasy walls, dirty dishes, and the corners that were rotting with mould. Overall it was a disgusting, and small apartment, but it was home. 

There were two other doors in the apartment but he didn’t even look at them as he went straight to his bed and sat on it, causing the old worn frame to creak. 

He proceeded to remove his worn-out boots. He then removed his shirt and jacket, leaving his upper body bare and revealing faded scars that littered his body. Lastly, he unbuckled his holster with his blaster and placed it on the crumbling bedside table. In the end, he was left with just his trousers, ready to sleep. He didn’t own any other set of clothes, especially not ones for sleeping, so this had to do. However, instead of going to sleep as he should, he clicked on the hologram to whatever it was that came up. 

A woman and a man appeared, they were talking about the news. Again he didn’t pay any attention to what they were saying, he merely wanted some noise to fill the silent space. 

Kylo leaned back on his bed to rest his back against the wall. He groaned a little from the pain as his bare skin touched the cold surface. He had a particularly tough day at work today and his muscles ached from overuse.

As he laid there, barely looking at the hologram, he tried his damnedest not to think about anything, to simply drown out any thoughts. Unfortunately, he found couldn’t do that, his thoughts kept going back to that name.

Luke Skywalker.

He gritted his teeth in anger. 

Just the thought of that name caused a deep untempered anger flow through him that if unleashed could destroy everything around him.

Kylo balled his hands into fists, his knuckles tightening and his nose flared as he tried to calm himself down, but it was easier said than done. 

Anger comes easy to him, that was his whole problem. It’s been a few years since the last time he lost his temper and when that happened he destroyed his apartment to such a level that he had to move out and bribe the owner not to tell anyone anything. The last thing he needs is to have the Republic order a full-on investigation, and thus have people following him around. Though he liked to think the opposite, people aren’t as stupid as he would hope, they’ll be able to tell that the damaged done to the apartment wasn’t caused by a blaster. That being said, he rather not have a repeat of that, not when he’s finally starting to settle down. 

Knowing what’s at stake, Kylo closed his eyes and took several deep breaths. It took him a while but he eventually forgot the name Luke Skywalker thanks to and old breathing exercise the very same man had taught him. 

Slowly he unclenched his fists as the last remnants of anger left him. 

He reopened his eyes and looked at the hologram and noticed that it had changed to the morning news, meaning that he really needs to go to sleep. He rather not be kept awake by caf tomorrow. 

He stood up from his bed and turned off the hologram, and turned to get back to bed, but just as he was about to he froze. 

The hairs at the back of his neck rose up as he felt a shiver run down his spine. 

Behind him, behind the locked door, _it_ was calling him. 

He slowly turned and looked at the door, appearing almost frightened, half expecting it to be open, but it wasn’t, it was locked as it’s always been. 

This was far from the first time he’s felt this, and by now one would expect him to be used to it but he wasn’t, he never was. 

Usually, he would ignore the calling, thinking that it’s probably just in his head, but he found he couldn’t today. He robotically reached for the lock pad, not really conscious as to what he was doing. He pressed his hand on the scanner and the lock beeped as the door slid open for him.

One would think there would be a beast of grand monstrosity inside with the way he was behaving, but the room was nearly empty were it not for the large compartment at the end of the room. No lights illuminated his way as he walked inside, going straight to the compartment. 

Every step he took the closer he got, and the stronger the calling grew. It was an odd feeling, like something was gnawing at his thoughts, and pressing into his very soul, like a raging storm that would tear him apart if he wasn’t careful. It was an odd, and not a pleasant feeling at all but he couldn’t stop himself from walking closer and closer to the compartment.

His brows furrowed in concentration as he finally stood in front of the compartment, the strange feeling at its peak but he didn’t stop there. He reached for the storage and opened it.

Without any lights, except for the stream of light bleeding into the room from the outside, it was hard to see what the object was but he didn’t need to see. To him, it was blinding, like a beacon calling at him.

For a brief moment, he simply stood there looking inside the compartment, wondering whether he should grab it or not. It was after what felt like hours that he decided to reach for the object, and brought it to the light, revealing a crossguard lightsaber.

Kylo’s eyes instantly widened, his breath catching at the feeling of familiarity and completeness he felt by merely holding his old lightsaber. 

His lips quirked up into smile, the first genuine smile in a very long time. The feeling was so intoxicating, and elating that he wondered why he ever put his lightsaber away? Why separated himself from his precious weapon? From something that was an extension of himself, and part of him? He should just keep it on him at all tim-

“No,” he said to himself harshly, remembering the sounds of screams and pleads for help as vividly as when he had heard them years ago. 

Kylo shook away the memory and put his lightsaber inside the compartment with finality. He couldn’t take it, couldn’t open himself to that world again because if he does he will lose himself, twist into something unrecognizable, and then _he_ will find him. 

Fear shot through him like a fiery iron at the thought of being found, especially by _him._

Without looking back Kylo closed the compartment and exited the room, feeling the lightsaber call him back more strongly than it did before but he didn’t pay any attention to it this time. As he exited the room he closed the door shut, shrouding the room in total darkness once again.


	2. Chapter 2

"The cargo's all ready for you aboard my ship," Kylo said tiredly, rubbing the exhaustion from his eyes but failing. "That'll be a thousand credits," he continued.

The large klatoinian, Tarroris, looked at him skeptically and annoyed clearly not trusting him one bit.

They were in a beat down hangar in Coruscant. There were countless small and large ships alike with their crews around them, repairing or, like him, unloading goods they were hired to transport. Being a smuggler's hangar, some people were questionable when it comes to trustworthiness, and their profession but that is to be expected in such a beat down, lower level area in Coruscant.

This was the lowest of the lowest in the great city-planet, a place most civilians seldom visit even those that live around the area. However, for those that did have the courage, they instantly fell in love with these type of places where the laws are mere suggestions rather than actual rules, and where the authority don't even dare dwell in.

That being said, anyone who comes to these places has to have questionable motives and agendas, and he was no different.

He was comfortable in this place since it's the spot where he finds most of his work, but that wasn't always so.

When he had first come here, six years ago, he had been on high alert with how everyone seemed to eye him, knowing that it's because he was the new guy around, someone they hadn't yet tried to rob. In fact, he remembered clearly how one of the pilots had come up to him and demanded that he hand over the cargo he was transporting. To show him how serious he was he pointed his blaster at his face. However, Kylo wasn't impressed as he had looked down the barrel, even as everyone quieted down and looked at him with smiles on their faces, expecting him to nervously do what the man demanded. What that pilot hadn't known is that blasters don't scare him, why should it? Even without his lightsaber, he was confident that he could stop the blast. Even if he was caught by surprise, and this man was right in front of him, it would still be all to easy.

And so he had refused and had proceeded to turn and get back to work but the pilot hadn't liked that. The smuggler, furious as everyone laughed at Kylo's audacity, brought his blaster up and pointed it at the back of his head. Kylo figured it was all meant to be a joke and he hadn't planned to really shoot, he had seen it in his eyes. That man didn't have the stomach to kill. He knows because he has seen the eyes of a man who has every intention of killing someone, he himself has had those eyes, and so he knew the pilot's eyes didn't show that unwavering hate, and coldness. However, due to the pilot's embarrassment and rage that clouded the his mind he had fire without meaning to, and Kylo wasn't caught by surprise. With quick reflexes honed since childhood, as well as the force, he easily moved his head slightly to the side, allowing the blast to fly past him, blowing his hair as it went straight to a crate that put a hole in it.

Everyone had been shocked after they saw what had just happened, and instantly decided to never bother him again. He was thankful for that and found it amusing how even the pilot that threatened him didn't so much as looked at him in the eye since then. Of course, none of them knew the extent of his skills, or of his force sensitivity, but they were no fools. No one would dare mess with someone that sidestepped a blaster bolt without so much as looking at it and then continued to work like nothing happened.

He had gained respect after that and people even approached him to work for him, but he refused everyone. He prefers to work alone, always has. Other people just cause too many problems.

"I'll have to check it all, then we'll talk about payment. Boy!"

Kylo's lips thinned in annoyance but he didn't argue as the crew standing behind the klatooinian walked towards his ship.

He didn't follow them either as he stood his ground, looking straight at the klatooinian's scrunched up, beefy face. He usually went in, but this time he didn't see the need in going inside the ship to make sure no one stole anything, he doubted anyone was stupid enough to do that not to mention that he had nothing to hide.

It took the crew several minutes to check everything, and take everything out of his ship but once they did one of them walked towards them. He was a greasy man with torn clothing, and missing teeth, the usual grunt you would see in these parts.

"Everything's here boss," the ratty-looking man said.

Tarroris nodded his affirmation and the other man left, going back to work.

Kylo turned to look at the klatooinian who turned to look at him, his skeptic expression gone, and watched as it was quickly taken over by one of almost friendliness.

"Seems you spoke the truth boy," he grumbled, grating on his nerves. He really disliked that nickname.

Tarroris took a step towards him and folded his large beefy arms to look up at him with a grin.

"I've been trying to get this cargo delivered for longer than a month, and you managed to do it all on yer own," Tarroris tapped the barrel and gave him a crooked smile. "You're a good smuggler kid."

"Yes well I learn from the best," Kylo shot back, folding his own arms to look down at the klatooinian.

"Oh? And who may that be?" He asked with a raised brow.

For a second Kylo tensed up, but he didn't answer and Tarroris got the gist and dropped the subject. That is the one other good thing about places like these, no one pries on other people's business.

Tarroris waved his hand dismissively.

"Well it doesn't matter, what matters is that you got the skills. So what would you say about working for me?"

Kylo didn't have to think it over for a second, as the answer came to him swiftly.

"Sorry but I work for myself," he answered sourly.

Tarroris looked at him disappointed but he didn't discuss the matter further. He could probably read into his expression, the one that told him not to ask again and sent most people walking the other way.

Neither spoke further on the matter as Tarroris paid him in full, and Kylo made sure to check every last credit. When he had first started out in this business he had been stupid and naive enough not to check his payment and only realized once he got home that he was missing half of the credits that were promised to him. He could have gone looking for the culprit then but he didn't, knowing it was his fault for being so stupid.

Once he got paid, and everything was out of his ship, an older model that was falling apart, he boarded it and flew out of the planet, not wanting to spend any more time in it than needed.

Sitting on the pilot's seat, Kylo put the ship in light speed, and once everything was calculated and he was certain he wouldn't crash into some planet or moon, he let go of the controls and walked out of the cockpit.

He walked down a narrow hallway, and into a corner and with precise knowledge of his ship he pressed a button that looked like it was part of the wall. He watched as the wall slid apart slowly revealing a hidden compartment with a single large barrel inside.

Kylo looked down at the barrel, easily noticing that it hasn't been opened since he last checked, but just in case he opened it.

Inside it, there was a dark, thick liquid. It was an oil of some sort, both expensive and illegal in this system, which means that it's sure to attract a few buyers that would spend good credit for it. Of course, Tarroris hadn't told him what it was when he hired him, both because he knew he would steal it and because he would charge him extra for such an expensive substance. However, he hadn't expected him to slice through the intricate lock like it was nothing and find out what the cargo was. He had his suspicions long before then. Such a popular dealer wouldn't hire someone like him for something so trivial. But anyway, he unlocked one of the barrels put its content in one of his own barrels and filled the empty one with regular engine oil. They both weighed and looked the same so they won't realize they've been tricked right away, but they will long after they sell it and then try to use it. Hopefully, then they'll learn never double-cross him again.

Kylo smiled and shut the barrel closed. He went back to the cockpit and went to his next destination.

He spent the next few hours going from planet to planet, picking up cargo and delivering it, stopping only once at a small moon to eat and refuel.

The small restaurant was old, worn out and dirty, a perfect spot for smugglers.

Kylo walked to the diner and sat by the counter. A droid walked up to him and took his order. As he waited he drank his caf and noticed the holopad in front of him the writing catching his attention.

_The First Order has overtaken the planet of Cato Neimoidia decreasing the Republic's hold on the senate._

He frowned and reached for the holopad and brought it up to read. He usually didn't care about the news, not caring about the ongoing war but this was big news. Cato is a politically, and tactically important planet, if the First Order has occupied it then it's only a matter of time before they gain control of the other planet and then the senate. But that wasn't all. Cato Is an export giant, it exports goods all around the galaxy so it's a smuggler's haven as well but with the First Order in control that'll make it difficult to do business there. It's not that the Republic made it easy on them, it's just that they often turned a blind eye but the First Order, well if they're not profiting on something then that means it has to be eradicated.

The First Order is ruthless in everything they did, but if you did business with them then it can be quite profitable. Due to this many smugglers liked to do business with them, and he himself has worked for them a handful of times as well. He disliked the First Order due to their cruelty, but the Resistance as well with their holier than thou disposition. However, when times get rough and he has no choice he won't think twice about doing business with them so long as he's careful in getting too close. If he did business with them he made sure he only spoke with lower-ranking officers, or better yet stormtroopers. He never went inside any of the bigger bases, and for those that he did go in he didn't go further than the hangar. If there was one thing he was meticulous about is not putting any attention on himself.

"I heard that Han Solo was spotted on one of the moons of Castilon doing business with the trandoshans" A voice said from the other side of the restaurant.

Kylo instantly froze at the mention of his name, but nowhere near the same intensity he had the day before when he heard the name Luke Skywalker. It's been years since he's heard those names, and for some reason, he heard them both in one week. He had a bad feeling about this.

Kylo listened as everyone chattered excitedly amongst themselves, and grimaced and took a gulp of his drink, wishing it was something stronger.

"Now that's a good smuggler, never got caught once in his life," someone said loudly.

Everyone hummed their agreement, and Kylo shook his head. What happened next he didn't fully understand, or what made him to do it, but before he knew it he opened his mouth.

"You sure about that?" He asked, not turning to look at them but he knew he had their attention. He could feel their eyes on the back of his head. "If I recall, the story goes that he got caught by the hutts, if it hadn't been for a certain Jedi he'd still be encased in carbonite."

Everyone hummed in agreement, however more solemnly than before. They all had forgotten about that little detail, typical. No one ever remembers the small details, the ones that put legends under a bad light, only their so-called greatness.

"Aye, but he didn't get caught, he was tricked, that's different," the man that had first spoken up said, sounding annoyed.

Kylo shrugged and downed the rest of his caf and turned to look at the group for the first time. They were the usual smugglers, worn out, dirty, with a cunning glint in their eyes. They sat by the side of the restaurant, to the other side of him but they weren't the only ones looking at him, everyone else was.

So much for avoiding attention.

"Tricked or not it doesn't matter, Han Solo's just a legend," he grumbled and began to walk out of the diner, half meaning what he said. The man Han Solo is very real, but the Han Solo in all those stories is not. The Han Solo these people were referring to is the one that saved the galaxy and could do no wrong, the one Ben Solo used to look up to as well.

He made it to the entrance of the diner, but before he exited the man spoke up angrily.

"That ain't so!" He growled.

"How would you know, have you ever met him before?" Asked Kylo amused, looking back at the man.

The man opened his mouth to respond but then closed it, and squirmed a little, appearing incredibly annoyed.

"No, but plenty of smugglers have, he isn't just a legend."

Kylo smirked in amusement at how adamant he was, like a child who's just been told his favourite hero in the hologram isn't real.

"You really do idolize him don't you?"

The man's cheeks reddened and looked embarrassed as everyone chuckled.

Kylo didn't say anything further on the matter as he scoffed and exited the restaurant.

He walked to his ship all the while thinking about Han Solo, his so-called father.

He wondered what that man would have done if he told him he's the son of his idol. Would they be mesmerized by him as they were by Han Solo? He seriously doubted, he never did anything of importance, most people don't even know Han Solo had a son to start with and that's not likely to change. He knew him, he knew Han didn't like to talk about his family to others and he couldn't care less either.

When he had been a boy and he had accompanied his father on those rare times around the galaxy, he would often order him to stay with the ship. He guessed it was because it was too dangerous, but something always told him he was also embarrassed to have to carry a child around. That it would ruin his image. It doesn't matter to him anyway, he hasn't seen his father in twenty-two years and therefore hasn't considered him a father for a long time.

Kylo entered his ship and quickly put it in orbit. There weren't any more jobs to be done, his day was done. He could go to Tatooine and sell the oil to the hutts but he wanted to go home, not to mention that if Han Solo is indeed close by he rather be as far away as possible.

Once he landed in Republic city he quickly exited his ship, left it in the usual public hangar and made sure no one could get in and steal it. He didn't wander around the city, being far too tired and instead made his way to his apartment.

Once he reached his home he bumped into the sullustan landlady. She had practically hit him with a slipper she had been holding, clearly having had waited for him for a long while. She angrily demanded her rent. Kylo had no choice, he paid her then and there.

The remainder of the day he spent as he usually spent it, reading, eating, but mostly exercising and doing the Jedi forms he learned long ago. He didn't want anything to do with the Jedi, the force, any of it, but these forms, he finds, they help with clearing his mind. After he's done exercising he eats and then heads out for a run.

He usually runs near his home, which means he encountered a few resistance cadets. He lives near the Republic academy so it's inevitable to see them. They usually didn't bother him, they merely stare at times, but that was it. However, he finds that today he sees merely a few, far less than the usual and he wonders why that is?

Once he's done with his run and he makes it home it's already dark. He swiftly takes off his shirt and jacket and lays down on his bed like he usually does every night.

Usually, he spends a couple of hours watching the hologram, but tonight he felt unusually tired not to mention that he kept feeling this weird feeling like something was about to happen.

' _Don't ignore what the force is trying to tell you, Ben,_ ' that's what Luke would often say to him, but look where that got him.

He had listened to the force, and for a time he thought the force spoke to him in return. Turns out though, what had been trying to communicate back then wasn't the force, but Snoke. He learned his lesson, he isn't going to open himself to the force, not again.

Kylo closed his eyes hoping that sleep will come to him fast. Unfortunately, the more time went on the further he got from sleep as the foreboding feeling grew stronger until it grew so strong that his head began to pound from a headache.

Kylo gritted his teeth and placed his pillow on top of his head, hoping the feeling would go away as well as the headache but it didn't do anything. Now he started to worry, this had never happened before.

The feeling grew and just as he was about to lose it, it disappeared entirely.

Kylo frowned under the pillow which he pushed off the back of his head. He looked around the room expecting something to happen but nothing did, everything was quiet as always.

Still very much confused, but too tired to care he laid back down on his bed. He closed his eyes and felt himself drift when a beep emanated from his bedside table.

Kylo nearly jumped off the bed, startled.

The beeping was insistent as he reached for the small device, glaring at it and fully intending to crush it in the palm of his hand. However, when he noticed what the device was he froze.

On the small screen of the device there red in big letters.

**Signal with T-70, X-Wing lost**

The screen didn't have anything else written on it, but Kylo didn't need any more information. He now knew where the strange foreboding feeling came from.

Poe's X-wing has been destroyed, that could mean only one of two things. One, he's either dead, or he's still alive but something has happened to him.

Kylo didn't waste time, nor did he even think about it as he jumped to his feet.

He needed to save Poe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's notes: I am on a quest to find a beta reader, so if anyone is interested please PM me! I would love to work with you!
> 
> Anyways, thank you for your comments, I really like to hear that people are liking this story so far, or if they have any criticism! So I hope you liked this chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

Kylo raced through the apartment, putting stuff he might need in a small bag. He didn't own much. Being constantly on the run he learned not to carry too many things around with him. So he mainly just took his blaster, prohibitions, some tools he might need and that was it. Everything else was unnecessary, and besides, he doesn't have much time.

As soon as he learned that something happened to Poe he instantly sprang to action, all traces of exhaustion gone. Overtaken by a worry.

He knew this would happen, sooner or later he knew something would happen to Poe. He told that damn idiot a bunch of times, but he never listened which is why he hid a tracker on his X-wing, and one of BB-8 who agreed only because Kylo was only worried about Poe's safety. He hoped he never had to use it, knowing that Poe would be angry. Putting a tracker on a Resistance pilot's X-wing, much less a commander goes against the rules of the Resistance, and he guessed the laws of the Republic as well. This is the reason why Kylo never even looked at it, he just kept it on his bedside table in case of emergencies, and this was definitely one.

In his life there haven't been many people he's come to care for, or become important to him but Poe was definitely one of them. He persistently became his friend even though he made it clear he didn't want anything to do with anyone. Poe was always stubborn like that, and for once he was thankful for that. He was his only friend, the only person that would care if something happened to him, even when he himself didn't care. For that reason he needed to save him, knowing that Poe would do the same.

Kylo looked down at the small device, its red letters saying that Poe's ship has been destroyed, which didn't make him feel any better, so instead, he clicked a button. The screen changed into a bunch of numbers, coordinates to Poe's last known location.

He read the numbers not needing to read them more than once to know that the location was Jakku. He knew to go to that wasteland was a bad idea, but does anyone listen to him? Thugs, that's the type of people that go to that planet. He himself has never been there but he knew enough about it to avoid it, unlike Poe.

Kylo clicked the button again, and to his relief, he found that BB-8's tracker was still functioning and by the looks of it the little droid was unharmed. Thankfully, BB-8's location red Jakku too, but his was changing, meaning that the droid was wondering around the planet and now he knew exactly where he needed to go.

Kylo put the device inside his pocket and put his bag strap over his shoulder.

If he wanted to find Poe, and know what happened to him he needed to find BB-8, and maybe then he can go find the pilot, alive. Yes, alive. He refused to believe Poe was dead, to mention that something told him that he was still breathing. That idiot is too stubborn to die.

With a plan, Kylo headed to the door only to stop once he was in front of it, realizing he was forgetting something.

Kylo gave out a deep breath and turned trajectories, going to the locked room where his lightsaber was. He could leave it, but this may very well be the last time he stepped inside this apartment. He may not use it, but he couldn't leave his lightsaber behind.

Unlike yesterday where he was unsure, and nervous to go in the room, he merely unlocked it and walked in.

He was instantly overcome by that feeling that called to his very soul but he tried his best to ignore it and walked towards the compartment. His friend is in trouble, he has no time to wait and think things through.

Kylo opened the compartment, revealing his lightsaber.

For a few seconds, he merely looked at it as the realization hit him. He knew that whoever shot down Poe's X-wing had to be from the First Order, so that means that Poe is probably being held by them, which also means that if he wants to save him he needs to face the First Order. Knowing this, he knew he couldn't just face the First Order with a blaster, he'd be killed, or worse, captured. If he wanted to save Poe he needed his lightsaber, he needed the force, at least until he finds his friend.

' _But if you do, then he'll find you,'_ he told himself, overcome with fear.

' _But if you don't then Poe is as good as dead,'_ he thought, balling his hands into fists, angry at the predicament.

Kylo took a deep breath, he knew what he needed to choose but it was difficult. It's been nine years since he last used his lightsaber, he wasn't even sure if he could properly wield it after all these years. But once again he didn't have any time to think it through.

He reached and grabbed the lightsaber from the compartment.

Kylo instantly felt the feeling of familiarity, and completeness he got every time he touched his lightsaber. However, instead of dwelling too long on it he clipped it to his belt, the first time in many years, and once again tried not to think too hard on it as he exited the room.

He walked into the city in the dead of night, and towards the hangar where he kept his ship.

It was really late so there weren't many people walking around the streets, nor were there many speeders. This made it easy for him to get to the hangar without any delay and soon he was flying into space.

As he sat on the pilot's seat he looked back at the planet, his home, for a brief few seconds. Something told him he wouldn't be seeing the planet again, and that was disconcerting. Hosnian prime has been his home for eight years and though he had few good memories of it he stills didn't want to leave it behind.

Kylo sighed and punched the calculations to jump to light speed. The less he thought about this whole situation the better.

_~K~_

Kylo rubbed the sweat from his forehead as he paid the older women.

He's only been on Jakku for one hour and he was already in a sour mood.

He hated the heat, the people, the smell, he disliked this whole kriffing planet. From being forced to change credits to the local currency, portions, to trying to find his way around only to find that most people don't speak basic and he doesn't speak the native language either, he just wanted to board his ship and leave. However, the duty of finding BB-8 kept him going. The first thing he did was to find someone that could speak basic which wasn't that hard. However, once he did find someone He didn't trust them enough to speak to them. They eyed him, or rather the small pouch filled with portions.

This is why he hated backwater planets like this one. He always needed to be on high alert in civilized planets, but these ones were worse. If he wasn't careful someone would take that to their advantage and rob him, or take advantage of his lack of knowledge. Although he was confident he could dispose of any thug that decided to cross him, he still didn't have time to do that, not to mention that it would put too much attention on himself.

He needed to find BB-8. Last time he looked the device said the droid was somewhere in the desert, north from this outpost. He had wanted to simply go into the desert and get him, but he knows how dangerous the desert can be if one didn't know where they were going, and besides. Looking at BB-8's coordinates he could tell that the droid was making his way to the outpost, so all he needed to do was wait for him to show up.

" _Mkarle,aqitop_ " the old lady said, handing him a container filled with water.

Kylo didn't say anything as he took the old worn-out container and drank.

The water was warm and tasted like dirt, but he was incredibly thirsty so he didn't care. He drank to the last drop.

Putting the container down, he leaned on a wooden post and looked ahead of him, at all the people working and trying to survive.

There were old and young, working in the tents, their entire attention fixed on what they were doing as if their lives depended on it. In regards to appearances, everyone pretty much looked the same. They all wore the same faded desert clothes. Their expressions were haggard, and all of them looked like they haven't eaten in weeks with how skinny they were. He always thought his life was difficult, having to keep a low profile, and living with the bare necessities, but these people. Well, they had it worse than he, and the sad thing is that they don't know anything better, couldn't fathom what life outside this junkyard could be like. This is one of the reasons why he hated the Republic, instead of paying more attention, and helping planets like these they're busy arguing amongst themselves, never really doing anything, all the while people like this suffer. They can say whatever they want about equality, and justice but they're just as bad as the First Order, giving people hope when there is none.

Kylo shook his head in disgust, and closed his eyes, changing his train of thoughts. His life was already wretched, he didn't need to think about other people's too.

Instead, he wondered where Poe could possibly be. If he was in the hands of the First Order then he must be in one of their star destroyers, which made this whole rescue even harder. How in the stars will he be able to get inside a star destroyer, find Poe, and then somehow leave without anyone noticing? He could use the force, but there's so far that could take him. The force could do many incredible things, but if it had a weakness he had to say it was technology. The cameras in the star destroyer will easily catch him, force or not, and then he'll have an entire ship full of stormtroopers after him. If that wasn't difficult already, he didn't want to think about the fact that Poe probably wasn't being kept in some meaner star destroyer either, he was probably being kept in one of the main ones.

Thinking about how he was going to get into the Star Destroyer he couldn't help but remember the story of how Han Solo and Luke managed to get inside the Death Star. According to them they had gone inside the monstrous station, evade everyone, got Leia out, and all with just one casualty. However, those were different times. It was easier to not get caught, but with all the new technology, it was nearly impossible. There was, however, another way.

Kylo tensed just thinking about it.

Poe may have information on Skywalker, but if there was one thing Snoke wanted more than the old Jedi, it was him. Constantly, he's searching for him in the force, trying to force him to return to him. That's why he had to disconnect himself from the force because if he so much as used it he was certain Snoke would find him. He wasn't really sure how it worked, he's never learned of the force working in such a way, not to mention that the act should kill anyone, regardless of how strong in the force they were. The point though wasn't how he was able to do it, the point is that Snoke wanted him, wanted him to become his apprentice, to use him as a weapon, so it wasn't so farfetched that he would let Poe go in exchange for him.

Kylo frowned at the thought.

He wasn't sure how to feel about that, but one thing was for certain, he would do it if there was absolutely no other choice. He's known for a long time that his life wasn't really worth anything, he's taken the lives of innocents, and made others suffer, the way he saw it his life was null long ago. Poe's however, is dedicated to helping others, in making the galaxy a better place. If he gave himself to the First Order then there would just be one more evil in this galaxy, but at least Poe would continue to save the galaxy.

"That jacket, it belonged to his master."

Kylo's eyes flew open. It didn't take him longer than a second to find where all the commotion was coming from.

His gaze instantly zeroed in on the two people in front of him, and specifically the droid.

Kylo's eyes instantly widened when he noticed the droid was none other than BB-8.

After one hour on this horrible planet, he's finally found him, and so he didn't waste time and made his way towards the two thieves who haven't even noticed him.

"So… you're with the Resistance?" the girl asked, and the other male looked at her confused.

Kylo barely registered their faces, not caring to know what they looked like as he took out his blaster and pointed it at the girl.

"Hand over that droid," he hissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was tiny, but I had to make it small because it's actually a section of a monster chapter. This being said I pretty much have almost everything done on the other chapter, I just need to edit so you can expect me to update soon.
> 
> In regards to the story, I'm not sure if this pace is a bit too fast, or if everyone's ok with it. I do promise that everything will slow down eventually, and the story will diverge from the canon.
> 
> So thanks for reading, please comment, and see you next time!


	4. Chapter 4

The girl and the man both turned to look at him, confusion clear in their eyes, but then the man's changed to one of shock and fear when he noticed the blaster. The girl, interestingly enough, didn't hesitate to bring up the staff she was holding and pointing it at him. She glared at him, ready to strike if he did anything.

Kylo wanted to scoff in amusement, but didn't really have the time, nor was he amused. He hated thieves, and he was sure this girl was trying to steal BB-8. Why else would the droid be with her? People on this planet are all the same, stealing when the opportunity presents itself, but this time it was a little sad. Sad to see such a pretty girl resort to stealing, but no matter, he will take BB-8 from her regardless.

Kylo's eyes narrowed, and the grip on his blaster tightened. Likewise, he watched as the girl's muscles tensed, and her grip on her staff tightened. For a second he was a little impressed, there aren't many who would dare stand their ground against him, not with his physical build. This girl though, she didn't appear at all scared, in fact, she looked annoyed.

He had to give it to her, for a thief she sure had courage.

He vaguely heard the man behind the girl say something, but he didn't pay any attention to him. His full concentration was on her.

Her hair was pulled up into three buns, and her eyes a light brown. Her skin seemed soft to the eye despite the harsh Jakku sun. Overall she was much too pretty to originate from this planet, so that means that she either has business or she moved here. Either way, she is crazy for coming to Jakku.

However, apart from her physical appearance, there was something strange about her, something he couldn't quite place.

Beep, beep, whirl

Kylo's and the girl's eyes finally tore away from one another as they both looked down.

BB-8 rolled up to him, and bumped against his leg almost affectionately, then turned to face the girl and beeped.

"You know him?"

"What do you mean you know her?"

They both said in unison, shocked.

BB-8 beeped his affirmation, and both of them turned away from the droid to look at the other. For a brief second, they both kept staring at each other. Neither one trusted the other to lower their weapon first so they both did it at the same time, slowly.

Now that the impending fight was out of the way Kylo realized that she didn't look at all like a thief, at least not the ones he's used to.

Kylo narrowed his eyes and looked from the man to the girl confused, wondering how in the stars they came across BB-8 and befriended him. As far as he's known BB-8 he hasn't seen the little droid trust, anyone, unless Poe said they were trustworthy, and since Poe was nowhere to be seen how did they do it?

"Who-"

Before he could complete his question BB-8 beeped again, this time more insistent.

"Run?" both he and the girl asked the droid confused.

BB-8 didn't waste time answering and instead rolled to the other side of the tent. Kylo glanced a the girl for a brief second, not trusting her and neither did she as she also met his eyes. All of them quickly followed the droid, and instantly realized what BB-8 had meant.

Far from them, directly in front of them, there were two stormtroopers talking to a local, a thug by the looks of it.

He had a bad feeling about this.

The thug turned as if looking for something, when his eyes landed on them he pointed their way. Both troopers looked at them and began to walk towards them, their blasters up.

"Shit," Kylo growled, while the other man grabbed the girl's arm and pulled her the other way.

"What are you doing?" She growled, but the man paid her no mind as he kept pulling her.

"Come on!" the man shouted at both of them, worry clear in his voice.

However, Kylo did not listen and stayed his ground. There wasn't much he could do against the First Order, but this he could handle.

With his blaster still in his hand, Kylo brought it up and pointed it at the troopers who kept running towards him. They both noticed the danger and instantly pointing their blaster straight at his head.

"What do you think you're doing?!" the man asked, stopping to look at him shocked.

What was he doing indeed? By all rights, he should be running, and avoid bringing any attention to himself but he was running out of time. The longer Poe remains in the grasp of the First Order the more likely he is to end up dead, he doesn't have time to run away from Stormtroopers.

And so he decided not to listen as he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. For a brief second, he hesitated as he opened the connection between him and the force slightly. It wasn't much but he was instantly overwhelmed. The land, the animals, the people, as well as the troopers and their blasters that were ready to be fired at any moment. He could feel it all as if it were all at the palm of his hand. As if all he had to do was squees and he will snuff out everything around him. It was a terribly addictive feeling, not to mention that the same small voice he's heard all his life kept telling him to give in.

Kylo frowned, and took a deep breath, ignoring the small voice and locking it behind lock and key in the depth of his mind.

He didn't need to pay attention to anything else but the troopers, so he stopped sensing everything else. However, despite only paying attention to the troopers there was something weird, something that stood apart from everything else around him, something soothing.

"Blast him!" one of the troopers shouted.

Kylo's eyes instantly flew open, narrowing and zoning in on the stormtroopers.

For a brief second the troopers tensed up, seeing as he kept advancing towards them, not an ounce of fear in his eyes. However, that did not last as they fired at him.

"Get out of there!" he vaguely heard the girl say, his whole concentration was on the red blast heading towards him at a rapid speed.

This was so much different from that incident with the pilot, that idiot barely knew how to hold a blaster. He hadn't even needed to use the force then. These troopers, however, are weapons trained from birth, and their blaster is no piece of junk.

Once more Kylo closed his eyes, knowing that they would trick him, and used the force instead.

Everything seemed to quiet down as he could clearly see the blast in his head, almost as if it were moving in slow motion.

Kylo easily turned his body and let the blast pass through the air, onto a table full of junk behind him. Now that the blast has been evaded, he had exactly less than a second to shoot the trooper that had just shot him before the other's blast landed on him.

Kylo didn't hesitate, he opened his eyes and shot the trooper clean in the head, killing him on the spot. As fast as humanly possible, he dodged the other blast and shot the other trooper dead. For a second he simply looked at the dead bodies, a little winded. If this had happened years ago this would have been a lot easier. However, it's been a long time since he's used the force so he's out of shape. Speaking of the force.

Kylo took a deep breath and shut his connection to it, silencing everything around him once more.

"Where the hell do you know this guy from?" Asked the man to BB-8, snapping him out of his thoughts.

Kylo turned to look at the two strangers who were looking at him shocked.

BB-8 beeped his answer, but it was cut off by the loud screech of a ship, more specifically a TIE fighter. Kylo watched the other man as he also, recognized the sound, and dragged the girl towards one of the tents, and this time Kylo followed.

"Stop that!" the girl growled.

The four of them ran inside a tent and stopped inside it to catch their breath. Well the both of them needed to catch their breath, he stood by the entrance and kept watch.

"They were after us, why are they after us?" the girl asked in disbelief.

"They saw you with me," the man answered, searching the tent, no doubt for another weapon but there was nothing else but scrap metal. Kylo wasn't at all surprised by that, being a backwater planet and all.

"Well thanks for that," the girl responded sarcastically, and clearly annoyed.

The other man spoke again and Kylo tuned them out as he kept looking out the tent, not caring one bit about these two stowaways. He was here to find BB-8, not to help them. He didn't even understand how BB-8 got entangled with them in the first place, how he got entangled with them! He prefers to avoid people, knowing that they would only slow him down.

"Are you ok?" The girl asked BB-8, genuinely concerned snapping him out of his concentration.

Kylo turned and watched her as she knelt in front of the droid, genuinely concerned. A rare thing to see. No wonder BB-8 likes her so much.

Kylo shook his head in disbelief.

Yes, that's going to be a problem. Most people don't treat droids with care, and concern. He can already tell that BB-8 won't want to leave her behind and that only made his job a lot harder.

"We need to-" Kylo suddenly stopped, and fell silent as he listened intently. BB-8 and the other man both quieted down as well, with BB-8 becoming increasingly agitated. A loud swoosh sound was coming from above him, and the three of them knew what kind of thing could make that distinctive sound.

Kylo's grip on his blaster tightened, and he looked up, sensing that the ships were directly above them. What kind of trouble did he get himself into?

"Stop taking my hand!" The girl growled, causing Kylo to look down at her.

Once again, she was being pulled by the other man who was more frantic than ever to get away, meanwhile, the girl didn't seem to understand the urgency of the situation.

Kylo merely leaped after them, and out of the tent. As soon as they left it a Tie fighter flew right past them, blowing the tent to pieces, far too close.

The four of them went flying from the force of the blast.

He landed hard on his back, grimacing from the pain. Beside him lay the girl, also winded and shocked by the blast. His ears were ringing, his back felt like it a rancor stepped on it, and he was seriously questioning his decision. A few hours into this so call mission to rescue Poe and the First Order is already after him.

The girl groaned from the pain, but that didn't stop her leaping into action in mere seconds.

Kylo watched as her eyes go to him first, worry clear in them but once she knew he was okay she quickly turned her attention to the other man who was lying on the ground unconscious. He watched her bewildered as she didn't think twice and ran towards the unconscious man, someone she seemed to only have met quite recently. How could anyone care so much for someone they've only just met? Kylo didn't understand, and he didn't care enough to stop and think about it either not when he could hear the TIE fighters turning to shoot at the town.

He barely registered the girl offering her hand to the now conscious man as he practically hauled them off the ground, much to their bewilderment.

"There's no time to sit and have a chat!" He growled, spotting BB-8 who was rolling towards them.

"And what's your plan then?" Asked the girl, irritation clear in her voice. He didn't have to know her to know she dislikes being ordered or dragged around.

He didn't answer as they kept running, his eyes on constant alert.

Around them, Niima Outpost was in complete disarray. Explosions had torn tents and other buildings apart, scattering merchants, traders, scavengers, maintenance workers, and every other innocent bystander who struggled to look for cover.

He knew this was bad, and if they didn't manage to get out of this planet fast then the entire First Order fleet will be over them in no time.

"Isn't there any shelter around here?" The man asked, his voice sounding a little frantic.

The girl shook her head.

"Nothing strong enough to withstand TIE fighter weapons!"

"Well, we can't keep running!" The man shot back, worry. now clear in his voice.

"I have a ship. If you stop talking we may get to it before they kill us," Kylo barked.

"You're a pilot?" The man asked the obvious, and Kylo didn't even answer that question. He has a ship, of course, he's a pilot.

In the distance, Kylo could see his ship, a small red one. It wasn't a thing of beauty but it's fast and sturdy, it can definitely get them out of this mess. The only problem is that they were still dangerously far from it and terribly exposed on the bare landing area.

Another craft loomed off to their right, nearby.

"How about that ship, it's closer! If nothing else, we can get out of sight!" The man shouted.

The girl barely glanced in the vessel's direction.

"That one's garbage! We need something that'll move, not just get off the ground—if we're lucky!"

Upon hearing that Kylo turned to glance at the ship, agreeing with the other man. With how far his own ship is they're not likely to make it. However, as soon as his eyes landed on the ship the man had referred to he nearly froze on the spot.

Beside them, covered by a large dusty tarp, was the Millennium Falcon.

Shock wasn't enough to describe what he felt when he laid eyes on the heap of junk, but when he heard the TIE fighters above them he snapped out of it.

They all ducked simultaneously as the two TIE fighters roared overhead. But instead of firing at the tiny figures, their gunners directed bursts of energy at his ship.

Kylo watched as his ship came apart in a ball of flame, flinging bits and pieces of itself in all directions as the detonation scorched the landing area.

The three of them threw up their hands. When they lowered them, nothing was left to be seen of his ship but a smoking pile of rubble. Kylo almost wanted to mourn for the ship, he hadn't even finished paying it! But then the girl spoke up.

"Okay...the garbage it is!"

Changing direction, they raced for the Millennium Falcon. His feet seem to get heavier the closer he got. Years upon years of memories were practically flashing behind his eyes. The others didn't seem to notice his hesitation as they went up the ramp.

The girl hit a wall panel even before they were safely aboard. To his great relief, it responded. At least the ship seems to be working somewhat.

The ramp behind them rose and the lock sealed. The vessel's layout was straightforward, not to mention that he's walked these corridors since he was an infant, so he led them to the cockpit immediately.

The girl tossed her staff to one side and threw herself into the pilot's seat, not even asking or looking back at Kylo as she did.

Kylo looked at her confused. Did this girl even know how to pilot a ship? He seriously doubted, being from such a planet. He's the one that should be piloting this piece of garbage, not to mention that he actually has experience. How did the Millennial Falcon end up in this backwater planet anyways?

"Do you even know how to pilot this ship?"

The girl didn't answer him, instead, she glared back at him for a second and went back to preparing the ship.

He didn't have time to argue with her so he took the copilots seat instead, trying his best not to remember who usually sits on this seat.

He prepared the ship for flight, pressing all the buttons on his station with expertise the girl, however, was having some problems. He watched her as she pressed the buttons, some of them the wrong ones.

' _We're gonna die,'_ he thoughts to himself.

When the console in front of her immediately came to life. She tapped the visualization.

"Gunner's position is down below!"

The other man turned on the spot and headed to the gunner.

"You ever fly this thing? Or anything like it?"

He doubted, he wanted to say but he bit his tongue.

As BB-8 looked on, she shouted back to him, "I've piloted all kinds of craft, but nobody's flown this old crate in years!"

So the Falcon has been on this planet for quite some time? Well, that was interesting.

"Then what makes you think it'll get off the ground?" he called.

Her reply was grim. "If you prefer, we can leave and try running across open tarmac while being shot at!"

Kylo gritted his teeth as he listened to them arguing like children. There's probably an entire Frist Order squadron after them by now and here they were wasting their time. Thankfully they both seemed to realize their situation and stopped talking altogether.

He watched at the girl rapidly ran through a standard pre-lift sequence, activated the full panoply of relevant instrumentation, and sat back looking at the counsel nervously. He knew she did some mistakes, but she did get almost everything right. There might be some stumbles along the way but at the very least the ship will fly.

"I can do this, I can do this—" she kept saying to herself, and that made him more nervous.

At the stern of the old ship, long engines flared to life. Fully powered up now, it soared into the bright blue sky of Jakku but not efficiently as he had expected.

Shedding tarps as it rose, it spun and wobbled wildly, nearly crashing back to the ground. Wrestling with the unfamiliar controls, the girl managed to level off just in time to crash into the town's entry archway. Kylo's grip on the controls tightened, and he was really close to pushing her out of pilot's chair and taking over. He only stopped himself from doing just that because they had no time.

"Hey! That's miiiiine!" Someone said below the ship, and he watched the girl as a smirk made itself onto her lips.

Kylo cringed as the ship hit a few things along the way, but thankfully the girl seemed to pull herself together and managed to get the Falcon in the air. She grabbed the accelerator, and this time, more sure of herself, she pushed it.

The Falcon blasted away from the port. The pair of TIE fighters that had been shooting up the town immediately gave chase.

The girl headed skyward, and he was relieved to feel the ship's increasing power as they soared away from the surface.

"Stay low!" The other man yelled through the com.

"Put the shields up," she practically commanded him, even though she didn't need to. He had long put the shields up.

"I'm going low!" she shouted at both of them.

Driving the ship surfaceward, she pulled up at the last possible moment and sent them screeching across the ground.

Trying to match the maneuver while pursuing at high speed, both TIE fighters shot past, unable to slow in time. They did, however, each manage to get off successive bursts from their weaponry. Her brows were pulled together as she put all of her concentration on flying. In the meantime, Kylo did his best to give her support as the copilot.

He was thankful for his quick thinking, otherwise, he wouldn't have put the shields up on time and the twin blasts that hit them might well have brought them down. He may dislike the Falcon with a passion, but he had to admit it's unexpectedly robust, something that the girl seemed to realize. Han Solo had done plenty of modifications to the Falcon, many of them illegal and some of them he had even helped him install when he was just a boy.

Kylo snapped himself out of those old memories. He didn't need to be distracted, not now.

The girl pulled the controls, doing her best to accelerate and dodge. The ship wobbled a little from destabilization caused by being to close to the ground.

"Press the stabilizer," Kylo suggested, pointing at the button to the girl's left.

The girl looked at him for a second, surprised that he had spoken, but didn't say anything as she reached for the button and pressed it. The ship instantly stabilized.

"Thanks," she whispered softly, but he had heard.

He looked at her a little shocked and confused by her gratitude, then it occurred to him that he hasn't been thanked for anything in a very long time. He never really got out of his way to help anyone, and he wouldn't exactly say that he just helped her, more like he's looking out for his own neck. If she crashes against the surface of the planet then they're good as dead.

A blast rocked them, snapping him out of his thoughts. He looked ahead as she barely managed to hang on tightly to avoid a looming sandstone.

"Are you ever gonna fire back?" she yelled into the com.

Within the corridor, he heard the droid beeping madly as he rolled up the walls, across the ceiling, and everywhere except where he wanted to be.

"Working on it!" the other man called back to her. Kylo rolled his eyes at his incompetence.

Thankfully a moment later the weapons systems finally came to life, shooting at the TIE fighters for the first time. However, the TIE fighters were not deterred as they fired back in return.

Another detonation rocked the ship. If not for their shields, he knew, they would have been debris by now. His lips formed into a tight line as he concentrated on pressing buttons, and flying the ship alongside the girl. They were doing fine, better than he had expected but it wasn't enough. If they keep this up they'll end up dead.

"We need cover," he told the girl, trying to sound as composed as possible, even though he could feel his heart hammering in his chest.

"We're about to get some!" the girl responded.

Keeping as close to the ground as possible, she rose and darted over rocks and dunes, grazing a rock so closely that she took a chunk out of it. Likewise, the TIE fighters refused to gain altitude to attack from above, as they opted to stay close.

The other man continued to shoot at the TIE fighters, but with no luck. Kylo nearly let go of his own controls to get down there and shot the TIE fighters himself, but then he watched as the man managed to shoot down one of the TIE fighters. The ship rolled around in the air and then crashed on the sand.

"Whooooo!" he heard the man cheer over the comp.

"Damn, that was lucky."

"Nice shot!" the girl praised.

However, their victory was shortlived. They were still being pursued by the surviving fighter. This fighter was far more ruthless and skillful than the other as it landed a few shots on the hull of the Falcon.

Sparks flew everywhere, a few components damaged but the girl was not deterred. She kept flying as if nothing had happened. Their gunner tried to shoot back but none of his shots landed, instead they were shot by the TIE fighter again.

Kylo watched the screen in front of him as the guns on the Flaocn came offline, no doubt thanks to that last blast.

"Guns are stuck in forward position!" the man yelled. "I can't move 'em! You gotta lose 'em!"

Yet another blast rocked their craft. Kylo gritted his teeth. Much more of this, and he knew one of the TIE fighter's bursts was going to overwhelm their shields. However great the Falcon maybe, it's a small freighter, not a warship. They needed to lose this fighter and fast.

Kylo looked in front of him, a little shocked at what he saw.

Ahead lay the bulk of a downed Star Destroyer, it's mass inconceivably large where it rested on the sand. At first, he didn't understand why she was flying the Falcon closer and closer, but then he understood when he saw the opening to the Star Destroyer.

"You're mad,"

The girl didn't respond as she kept to her course.

Pulling on the controls, she drove the ship downward and into the gaping breach that was the center of a ruined engine thruster. Kylo couldn't help but close his eyes for a second, half expecting the girl to crash onto the first support beam. However, when that didn't happen he opened his them and was shocked to see that she was maneuvering the Falcon expertly inside the ruins of the massive ship.

The girl had probably expected the TIE fighter to give up the pursuit but it didn't, it stayed on their tail.

"Are we really doing this?" the gunner asked, sounding both afraid and shocked.

Sparks continued to flare from their ship's sides as the girl flew inside one increasingly narrow passage after another. For the first time since he met this girl, he was actually impressed and shocked.

He has been a pilot for many years, and he's met some of the best pilots int he galaxy so he knows this level of piloting wasn't possible from someone so clearly inexperienced. Kriff, this level of piloting was nearly impossible among the best pilots. There was only one explanation for this girl's skills.

Kylo turned to look at her, looking at the girl in a different light. She didn't notice his eyes on her as her grip on the controls tightened, and she kept flying the Falcon.

"Get ready!" she yelled at both of them.

Kylo turned his attention back on the controls, as he prepared for whatever the girl thought of next.

"Okay, okay! I'm ready!" The man shouted. "Ready for what?"

The girl didn't answer.

Uninterrupted light appeared at the far end of the service corridor down which she was flying. Another blast from the unrelenting TIE fighter pilot nearly sent the Falcon crashing into the corridor's ceiling, and she only managed to correct at the last instant. Kylo hissed at how closed that was.

Thankfully they didn't remain in the Star Destroyer for long, as they were quickly out of its body. The instant the Falcon emerged from the decaying guts of the old Star Destroyer, he was stunned at what she did next.

The girl reached for the power, cut it off and with expertise swung the ship completely around.

Kylo was shocked by her ingenuity and quick thinking as the ship's guns were now in position. The TIE fighter was none the wiser as their gunner shot him down.

The girl nor the gunner wasted time celebrating as she turned the ship hard away from the hulk of the Star Destroyer as the remaining TIE fighter burst into flames, lost speed and altitude, and crashed to the surface.

Kylo slumped back on his sit, finally able to breathe.

He was aghast at what he just saw. How on earth did the girl manage to do that? In all his years aboard the Falcon, he was sure he's never seen someone fly it so well, and by a sand rat at that.

He didn't ask nor did she say anything as she smiled and sent the Falcon accelerating into the clouds. The ship kept flying upwards until it was in the cold yet comforting blackness of space.

He was surprised to see that there wasn't a large First Order fleet waiting for them.

Knowing that they were no longer in danger the girl put the Falcon in autopilot and she slipping out of her harness and hurried out of the cockpit, leaving Kylo looking back at her confused.

"Come on!" she called back excitedly, the rush of adrenaline from their scape still present.

Kylo didn't think to argue with her as he slipped out of his own harness and followed the girl down the corridor, passing BB-8 in the process.

"Stay close to me," he ordered the droid.

Several short, curt beeps were what he got as a response. BB-8 wasn't happy with his unpleasant mood, but he followed him.

Once he was in the lounge he found both the girl and the man, breathing heavily and talking quickly. Kylo shook his head and rolled his eyes. They were both younger than him, but he was amazed at how childish they were.

"That was some piloting!" the gunner smiled disarmingly at the girl, and Kylo rolled his eyes once more.

"Thanks." She shrugged. "I've been flying every kind of junk you can imagine almost since I could walk."

This time she smiled. "Speaking of which, that was some shooting! I was worried you wouldn't have time to react."

"You could have told me what you had in mind. Might've saved me a heart palpitation or two."

She shook her head. "No time. I had to pull the turn almost as soon as I thought of it. I just had to rely on your ability to react to the maneuver."

On and on they both went, recounting the experience like a couple of children at a playground. He was pressed for time, but it was thanks to both of them that he managed to get BB-8, and himself out of there so he gave them a moment to talk. That also, gave him a moment to think about the impossible feat the girl just pulled. He wasn't a fool he knows the girl is force sensitive, and a strong one by the looks of it, however, she doesn't seem to be aware of it. No, definitely not aware. He could feel the force awakening inside her. How could someone so clearly strong int he force come from nothing?

Once they both seemed to calm down Kylo looked up at them.

"It just occurred to me that I don't know your name," the girl said a little sheepish.

Startled, the man seemed to realize that he was equally guilty of that.

"FN-2—Finn. Name's Finn. What's yours?"

"My name is Rey." This time when she smiled, all trace of the hardened, desert-dwelling scavenger melted away and Kylo noticed. It was a sweet smile, he found himself thinking. Warm.

"Rey…" Finn said almost reverently.

For a second Rey and Finn looked at each other, but then they realized that there was a third person among them. They both turned to look at him, a little unsure.

"Sorry I forgot you were there," Rey apologized, and Finn nodded. Kylo wasn't mad at them for forgetting him, it wasn't like he cared about them. "So what's your name?"

For a moment he thought about giving them a fake name, but why would he? It's not like they were likely to use it against him.

"Kylo," he answered with his rough voice.

"Kylo," Rey tasted the name on her lips. "Well, Kylo that was some good copiloting you did back there."

Kylo shrugged.

"Thanks." he pushed himself from the wall of the Falcon so that he was towering over them. "But now that we're out of danger, I need you to hand over the droid and the ship," he said once more, but this time he didn't point his blaster at them he simply crossed his arms.

Their reaction was instantaneous as they both gaped at him.

"Are you kidding me?" Finn asked while the girl shook her head, not at all impressed. In fact, she seemed to have expected him to say that.

"We can't give you a droid, it contains a piece to the map that leads to Luke Skywalker, were taking it to the Resistance," she said with finality as if telling him not to argue.

Kylo raised a brow and scoffed at the girl's audacity. Did this girl not learn that he's quite capable of getting what he wants? If he wanted he could take the droid and there was nothing this meagre sand rat could do about it.

Before he could say just that Finn spoke up, looking at him a little nervously.

"Why do you even want the droid for? BB-8 said he knows you, how?"

He tore his eyes from the girl who was glaring at him and looked at Finn instead. For a second Kylo considered not answering but if he didn't explain himself they won't let him leave in peace, not that they would either way.

"He belongs to a friend of mine that went missing yesterday." he couldn't help the worried tone that made it onto his voice. "I'm hoping the droid knows where he is." he really really was, otherwise he doesn't know what he'll do. "I don't care about the map or the BB-unit, once I find my friend you can have them both."

The ship went unnaturally quiet as Finn and Rey looked at strangely, almost as if afraid and saddened by something. It took a while, but it was Finn who answered.

"I'm sorry to say this but Poe was captured by the First Order… he didn't make it."

For a second Kylo thought he hadn't heard Finn correctly, but when he saw the solemn expression he knew he wasn't joking. It was like a gut-wrenching feeling when he processed Finn's words.

Poe is dead? How can that be? The stupid pilot isn't stupid enough to get caught, so how?

Finn took a step towards him.

"I'm really sorry, I tried to g-" before Finn could complete his sentence a section of decking broke loose, shot upward, and rested on the floor. Hissing vapour was starting to fill the room.

They were all snapped out of the conversation, especially Rey who didn't hesitate. Ignoring the emission spewing from beneath the deck, she raced over to peer down past the ragged edge of the opening. Finn joined her closely behind, meanwhile, Kylo remained on the same spot, trying to process things.

He couldn't believe his closest friend was gone, he simply couldn't. He remembered how Poe would often fantasize about joining the Resistance, of making a difference and now that won't happen because he's dead. Someone so selfless, and brave, not to mention a great pilot is dead and only those currently on this ship know that. How could the galaxy be so unfair? Taking someone who only wanted to make a difference and keep those don't give a shit alive?

Kylo felt something bump against his leg and he looked down. BB-8 was leaning on his leg, almost as if he was seeking comfort, a droid. Kylo didn't push him away.

"You're going down there? Without even knowing what the problem is?" he vaguely heard Finn say, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"The only way to know what the problem is is to go down there. Unless you've got a better idea?"

He turned and watched as Finn gave a reluctant shake of his head. "I'm real good at blowing things up. Not so good at putting them together. You sure there isn't anything I can do?"

"While I'm down there, don't touch anything which function you don't understand completely and if you hear a lot of screaming and cursing, stand by."

Finn seemed to considered. "You'll want me to pull you up?"

This time she did smile. "Only if there are just screaming and no cursing." With that, she slipped over the edge and down. Her slender form was quickly obscured by the roaring vapour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised this was going to be long. With the chapter before it ended up being 8k so I had to cut it in half. Anyways I hope you liked this chapter!


	5. Chapter 5

~ _R_ ~

In her life, she has never met a more infuriating man, not Finn of course who she instantly got along with and was helping her, but the other man, Kylo.

Starting with her day, it began as it usually did, scavenging. She had gone inside the large Star Destroyer, looking for parts to give to that horrid Unkar Plutt only to come across a BB-unit once she got home. She has seen many things while scavenging but never had she seen such a good looking droid, its metal casing was even shiny. She disliked taking big stuff like a droid, knowing that their owners are likely to come after them. With BB-8 though, she took him in simply because she felt a little sorry, she too knows what it's like to be left behind. Never had she expected BB-8 to be of such importance when she took him in, she much less expected the First Order to come after her. Thankfully Finn had been there to help, but Kylo...

Her first reaction upon meeting him was shock and confusion, but after he pulled his blaster on her it changed to anger. Never in her life has anyone pointed a blaster at her face. Of course, very few people on Jakku even own a blaster but that wasn't the point. The point was that this unknown man she had never met in her life had threatened her. Something like that she couldn't forget, no matter how he may have helped them back there. Thinking about that, she had been stunned to see how he had killed the two stormtroopers, with so much ease and methodically, it scared her. She has seen plenty of people die of starvation and diseases, but she has never witnessed someone kill another, much less with so much precision and lack of empathy. It made her blood run cold.

Despite that, she had decided not to judge his character to quickly, and put aside their differences for now. And so she asked him for his help in fixing the ship, but he barely glanced her way as he ignored her and sat on the booth. Granted that he just learned a friend of his was dead, they still had to fix the ship before they're killed! However, Kylo didn't seem to care and he made it his goal not to help in any way.

She did her best not to get angry, and not to throw a wrench at his head and instead focused on the now.

Rey brushed some sweat off her forehead. It was hard to see from all the vapour pouring out of the machinery, but she's used to working in worse conditions. There were times, in fact, when she has been forced to scavenge in the dead of night with the help of one miserable flashlight. In comparison this is easy, she even managed to find out what was causing the problem in less than ten seconds.

She popped up, surrounded by vapour. Perspiration streamed from her face. "It's the motivator. Grab me a Harris wrench!" She pointed behind Finn. "Check in there."

Turning, Finn unlatched the storage container she had pointed to and began rummaging through the contents. Before Rey went back inside and allowed the vapours to swallow her whole, she glanced at Kylo. He was still sitting in the booth, having an existential crisis by his far away look. Rey shook her head and went back inside.

"How bad is it?" he yelled back at her as he continued to sort through the container's jumbled contents.

She looked at the hissing motivator that was being held together by a strand of sealing tape. If they don't work fast it will soon break in two and then they'll be in trouble.

"If we wanna live," Rey's voice echoed from below, "not good!"

The ship gave a nasty jolt, and she grimaced when she hit her elbow against a metal beam.

"Look, they're out hunting for us now; we gotta get out of this system now! The longer we stay sublightspeed, the more certain the chance that their sweep scans will pick us up. I don't want to have to try and outrun a Destroyer!"

Rey ignored him and glanced at the nearby droid. "BB-8 said the location of the Resistance base is on a 'need to know' basis. If I'm going to take you two, I need to know!"

She attempted to tighten a loose screw with just her fingers but to no avail, not to mention that she had to be extra careful. Make the wrong adjustment and they could blow up the ship. Or the ship, responding on its own to unknown preprogramming, could blow them up. she hoped they hadn't escaped the clutches of the First Order only to eliminate themselves. She could repair anything, but this was proving to be a challenge.

She has spent most of her life fixing stuff and learning how things work, it was a good way to pass the boredom of Jakku, as well as surviving. People always need someone to fix things or to get a certain part. Sometimes said people offered her a job off-world, but she always refused, much to their shock. However, for the resistance, she will do her best to help them out. She despises the First Order, hates what they are doing to the galaxy, not to mention that they have come to Jakku enough times to leave a lasting impression.

"So, I didn't hear. Where's your base? Where's our destination?"

"Go on, BB-8. You tell her."

She listened intently, but nothing came from the droid. Not a sound, not a hum. For a second she was saddened that the little droid hasn't come to trust her enough despite what she did for him. Eventually, though, BB-8 finally uttered a short sequence of beeps and Rey looked surprised.

"The Ileenium system?"

She popped her head up.

Finally locating the tool, Finn passed it to her. "Yeah, the Ileenium system," he smiled, and looked relieved for some reason."That's the one. Let's get this crate fixed and head there as fast as we can, huh?"

"Doing the best I can down here." Rey vanished again.

Things were not looking good with the motivator. She tried to screw the pieces together but it wasn't enough. If she had her tools she might have been able to fix this a long time ago. On the other side of her worries were the rebel, the droid and the brooding man. She could drop them off somewhere, but couldn't take them all the way. It was nice to know that BB-8 trusts her, but she couldn't be part of that cause.

She wasn't gone long, nor was her attitude any more relaxed when she reappeared. "Bonding tape, hurry! If I get the ship working again, I'll drop you two off at Ponemah Terminal, but that's as far as I can go. Ponemah's still neutral territory. You should be able to make contact with Resistance representatives from there."

Something didn't feel right about that, with just leaving Finn, BB-8 and Kylo go while she stays behind, like a nagging feeling that was telling her to stick with them. Unfortunately, she didn't have any other choice either.

"What about you? What are you going to do? If anyone besides those two TIE fighter pilots saw you with us, your face is gonna be plastered all over this quadrant! If the Order doesn't haul you in for questioning, reward-seekers and bounty hunters will be scouring every port in hopes of picking you up. Better for you if you stick with us." He threw BB-8 a quick glance. "The Resistance will protect you."

She stopped for a second as she was about to screw the bolt. She was tempted, by force was she tempted for a second to say yes. To leave Jakku behind and join the resistance, to be anything else than a scavenger in Jakku, but she couldn't.

For a brief second, she felt eyes on her, eyes that weren't Finn's. She turned her head and her gaze met Kylo's. She frowned in confusion at the way he was looking at her. Inquisitively, and with an almost understanding, as if he knew what she was thinking. However, just as it came it went as he pulled his cold expression over his face once more, and turned to look ahead of him.

What was that about?

She shook her head and turned to look at Finn. Vapour continued to pour upward around her, though not as much as before.

"I gotta get back to Jakku!"

She said with finality, sure of her decision. She needed to wait for her parents, whoever they are. She's made it this far, she couldn't give up now. However, Finn seemed to not have heard her properly, as he looked at her utterly confused.

"Back to Jak—Why does everyone always want to go back to Jakku? There's nothing there! Sand and junk and rocks and sand and quicksand and sand, I don't get it!" Picking up what looked like a sealer, he turned to toss it to her, she already knew that wasn't what she needed.

"No, that one!" She pointed, but her stance was none too steady and her hand kept weaving around. Doing his best to follow her directions, he lifted another instrument. "No! The one I'm pointing to!"

"I'm trying! And you're not pointing real well, you know?" His exasperation nearly overcame his fear.

"That one! If we don't get a patch on down here, the propulsion tank will overflow and flood the ship with poisonous gas."

He tried another device, but it wasn't it and she was close to just getting it herself instead.

"No."

Another.

"No. That one, to your left! No!"

"Can't you help out?" Finn turned to look at Kylo, exasperated. "You probably know more about this than I do!"

Kylo's response was a deathly cold glare, and Finn paled, shut his mouth and shook his head.

"Never mind."

For the third time, Finn plowed through the disorganized tool container. Sidling up alongside Finn, BB-8 used his head to indicate the appropriate sealer. Rey was thankful to their droid, at least someone in this ship is useful.

"This?"

Finn visibly surprised when instead of an annoyed "No!"she replied with a loud "Yes!"

He tossed it to her, watched as she caught it easily and once more disappeared below. She went on to apply the sealer which, as she had expected, did the job and sealed up the broken motivator. She may not know much about this ship, and it's gone through a lot of modifications, but she knew she could fix it. There was nothing in the galaxy she couldn't fix, nothing. Now she just needed to make a few adjustments.

"You're a pilot. You can go anywhere. Why go back? You got a family there? Back on Jakku? Boyfriend? Cute boyfriend?"

Rey shook her head and scoffed to herself. Family, boyfriend? As if! Who has time for any of that anyways? Not to mention that the male populace of Jakku consists of scoundrels, moraless bounty hunters, and old fat merchants, there weren't exactly many men one such as her would be interested in. Scratch that. There weren't any men that picked her interest on Jakku.

As the flow of vapor finally slowed and then ceased, so did the interminable alarm. Rey's reappearance coincided with the return of comparative silence within the lounge. She broke it immediately.

"None of your business, that's why."

Her business is her business, no one else's.

The sudden dimming of lights put a halt to any argument. They flickered but did not go out. All four of the lounge's occupants, even Kylo who was pretending no one else existed, regarded their newly altered environment. BB-8 beeped nervously.

"That can't be good," Finn murmured.

"No, it can't be," Rey agreed as she climbed out of the opening, worried. Together, they headed back toward the cockpit.

Instead of Kylo, this time it was Finn who settled into the copilot's seat. Looking back at them was a dead console, and Rey tensed, and so did everyone else. She knew Finn isn't a pilot, but one did not have to be trained to know that a dead console did not bode well for future voyaging.

"It's the motivator, isn't it? That's the component you were so worried about."

She didn't reply, and Kylo leaned forward. His shoulder almost touching herS, and she tried to lean away but couldn't. Why did he have to have such a broad body?

"It's worse than the motivator?"

Both she and Kylo focused on the console in front of them, pressing a few buttons to see if they could fix it, but to no avail. She knew there wasn't anything she could do about this.

Kylo replied without looking up from the instrumentation. "She fixed that; this is something else."

She didn't have to look at Finn to know that he had tensed up. Without much hope, she tried several more controls before sitting back, defeated.

"Someone's locked onto us. All our controls are overridden. They've taken control of life support, too, for that matter. Easiest way to get us to cooperate."

She hasn't been in deep space, but she knows this is one of the tactics smugglers, and pirates use to board ships and steal what they can.

"Who's taken control of us?"

Tapping the scanner to remind him that it was useless, she could only shrug helplessly.

Nervously, Finn got out of his seat and headed for the overhead observation dome. Kylo took his place and began to switch a few buttons, but nothing.

"See anything?" she called back to him.

A few seconds later he responded.

"Yeah." He responded tensely.

He didn't say anything else, not needing to, not when the ship appeared before them at full view.

The other ship was gigantic, an enormous bulky freighter. The cargo bay door was open, and against the open hangar that loomed above, their stolen vessel appeared no bigger than an escape capsule. Its instrumentation frozen, its engines powerless, and its weapons systems dead, the paralyzed ship was drawn upward into the cavernous opening.

Rey looked at the only occupant in the cockpit nervously.

Kylo was eyeing the ship, his hand going to his blaster as if getting ready for the upcoming battle. He must know as she did that being hauled by a ship didn't bode well for them.

Returning to the cockpit, both turned to look at a defeated Finn who slumped back on the wall, his gaze fixed forward as he spoke.

"It's the First Order. They've got us. It's all over."

Behind them, BB-8 beeped, and Kylo tensed up, his hand grabbing his blaster. Having nothing encouraging to say, Finn did not reply.

She's going to wind up dead, like the other pilot, Kylo's friend. Her life wasn't that important to the rest of the galaxy though, she's just a scavenger no one will mourn her, but BB-8, he's important. Whatever map or other information the droid held would be forcibly extracted from him, after which his memory would be wiped, his AI circuits removed, and the remainder probably recycled as scrap.

Behind her, Finn grunted softly.

Rey looked at Kylo, who was glaring at the other ship so intensely that it was as if he was willing it to let them go through sheer rage. That wouldn't work of course, but, her previous experience aside, at the very least it was nice to know they had a capable fighter on their side. That only made her feel a little bit better however. She knew they'd be captured no matter how much they fight, and then they'd be killed, or worse. She may not know much about the galaxy, but she knew this much. The First Order is ruthless with all those who get in their way.

"What do we do?" Rey kept trying the controls. "There must be something."

He didn't look her in the eyes as he responded direction. "We can die."

She instantly refused to accept it. "There have to be other options besides dying!"

He sighed heavily. "Sure. We could run if the engines could be powered up. We could try and fight, if the blasters would function." He shook his head dolefully. "No, we're dead. We don't even have weapons, except for Kylo here and that isn't enough to hold them all off." He stopped abruptly. Now he did turn to her.

"Earlier, when you were working below: You said something about volatile chemicals? Mixing to create poisonous gases?"

She eyed him uncertainly. She didn't like where this was going. "Yeah, but I fixed that. There's no blending now."

His stare unflinching. "Can you unfix it?"

She eyed him for a second, taking her a moment to realize what he was going at. When understanding came, her expression brightened.

She didn't even say anything as she sprang to her feet. Together, they left the cockpit and headed back toward the lounge, BB-8 and Kylo trailing close behind.

For someone that seems clueless half the time, Finn sure has some good ideas.

The emergency masks they removed from their storage stations were designed to protect against loss of atmosphere. They most certainly were not intended to substitute for the environment suits that were employed during excursions. But for the plan Finn had in mind, they should do just fine. Working together, oddly enough Kylo helped this time, they succeeded in wrestling the droid down into the service area below the deck. Once all three had safely managed the short descent, Finn pulled the blown section of decking back into place over his head. Fortunately, it had come loose in one piece and was unlikely to be noticed by preoccupied intruders. At least, not right away. It would have to suffice.

Next to him, Rey was working hard to undo the results of her earlier repair, but it proved to be very difficult due to the tight space. This service area wasn't meant to house a droid and three grown adults, much less if one of said adult was built like a mountain.

"This'll work on stormtroopers?" she wondered as she manipulated the tools she had used earlier and left behind.

"Standard issue helmets are designed to filter out smoke, not toxins," he groaned when Rey unintentionally pushed him hard against the wall.

Rey was plainly impressed, that's two for Finn. "You Resistance guys really know your stuff."

He smiled. "You know what they say: Know your enemy."

Abruptly, the ship's internal illumination returned full strength. Even concealed within the service corridor, they could hear the muted sound of the ship's ramp lowering.

"Hurry" Kylo grumbled.

"I am hurrying!" Her fingers worked on the seal she had applied, but she just didn't have enough space.

"Really hurry!" Finn shouted back.

Sweat was beading down her forehead as she frowned, and concentrated.

"I put this seal in place to keep us alive, not counter a hostile boarding," she hissed back at him as her hands flew. "I made it to last. Don't expect me to take it apart in a couple of minutes! Does this look like I'm taking my—"

When they heard footsteps walk inside the ship, she quieted.

They waited, her heart hammering in her chest, and yet she was ready to spring into action if they're found out. She wasn't going to give up.

"This is a really tight fit!" Finn whispered softly, his cheek against the wall. Rey wasn't doing any better, she was sandwiched between both of them, her back was pressed to Kylo's front. And Kylo arms were stuck together, appearing like he was being squeezed alive.

"Wasn't there any other compartment we could have gone into?" Finn asked, his voice barely audible.

She felt Kylo's chest expand as he took a deep breath, probably to stop himself from murdering Finn.

"Or I could have just shot you and then we wouldn't be in this situation," Kylo growled, anger clear in his voice.

Rey rolled her eyes. Boys.

Finn prepared to argue but Rey kicked them both softly.

"Shut up, they're coming."

They waited for some time until finally, they heard a voice.

"Chewie, we're home," Rey heard a man say.

She didn't recognize the name, nor the voice but for some reason, she felt a shiver run down her spine as the atmosphere inside the service area seemed to dip. Behind her, she felt Kylo take in a sharp breath, and tense up like a statue. Rey tried to look back at him to see what was wrong but she couldn't with her position. Whoever this Chewie is, Kylo seems to know him and by his reaction, it wasn't a good thing.

What she did next, she didn't know why she did it, but when she felt his heart hammering at a rapid speed against her back she instinctively reached for his hand. It was difficult to find his hand at first, as she touched his chest and then his chin, but eventually, she found it and took a tight hold of it. She half expected him to rip his hand out of hers, but he grasped her hand tightly as if his life depended on it.

Rey stopped focusing on Kylo, and stopped breathing all at once when she heard the footsteps stop on top of where they were hiding.

None of them even had a chance to mentally prepare themselves when the covering in the deck above them was ripped away.

She had every intention of fighting, but when she saw Finn put his hands up in surrender, she didn't think twice about copying him. After all, he knows best about these situations. Both of them put their hands up in surrender, fear clear in their eyes until they found themselves gazing up at… not a stormtrooper.

The man holding the blaster on them was not wearing a helmet; not even a protective visor. There was nothing to interfere with his angry expression. he had gray tousled hair, and he wore the look of a man who had seen too much, too soon and been forced to deal with idiots all too often. Despite his age, the hand holding the blaster neither shook nor wavered. Rey eyed him, seeing as he appeared like a man that prefers to shoot first and ask questions later. Thankfully, he did not.

His eyes were glued on her, not looking anywhere else.

"Where are the-"

Before he could complete his question the man's eyes looked away from hers, and to the person behind her.

She felt Kylo's heart hammering faster than ever, not to mention that his grip on her hand was so tight she thought he might snap it in half. By Kylo's reaction, and by the man's impossibly wide eyes and how he paled considerably, she knew that both men know each other.

"Ben?" The man asked softly, sounding like he couldn't believe his eyes.

Behind her, Kylo tensed further, if that was even possible.

"Han Solo."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I watched TROS, that's all I'm going to say about it. However, I am thinking of writing one chapter one shot for it, so stay tuned!
> 
> So if you guys haven't noticed I put a K or an R to indicate the POV of the chapter, or section break. K obviously means Kylo and R is for Rey, and other POV's may make an appearance too. Just letting you all know so you're not confused.
> 
> So cliffhanger again, I know it sucks, but don't worry next chapter should be pretty interesting, trust me.
> 
> So hoped you liked this chapter, please comment and see you guys next time!


	6. Chapter 6

_~H~_

**5 ABY**

The galaxy celebrates. The fearsome Empire not only gone but the oppression is at an end and so the celebrations go for weeks. Fireworks on Chandrila. Festivals of food on Nakadia. Nonstop parties in the streets and on the rooftops of Coruscant. And this time, the Empire isn't there to spoil everything, proof to all those who are skeptical that the Empire is truly gone. None see even one Stormtrooper policing the festivities or protests around the galaxy. Instead, representatives of the New Republic attend all festivities, letting the people have their fun while they too celebrated. Just recently they were nothing but rebels after all.

Liberation Day is what is called, a seven-day festival.

However, for Han, it is everything but celebrations.

He was walking from one end of the hallway to the other, his head down and arms crossed as he looked at the floor worriedly. He was unfazed by the loud sounds of fireworks, and people celebrating on the streets. His faithful companion, Chewie, was leaning back on the far wall, looking at him. Even Luke stood by the doorway, his eyes closed and his breathing steady. Everyone appeared relaxed, all except for him.

It has been three hours since Leia was put inside the room alongside a couple of nurses and droids, and he was forcefully pushed out the door. Three hours and he still didn't know anything!

Han huffed and shook his head, worry was starting to get to him. What if something went wrong? What if birthing a force-sensitive child is different than birthing a regular child? Or what if it's the same, just that their son is a unique case? Luke himself claims that the kid is strong with the force, something he can apparently know before he's even born. But what if that wasn't it, what if-

"Relax Han," Luke breathed out.

Han stopped and raised his head to look at Luke. His now brother-in-law still had his eyes closed, his face one of complete serenity. He saw Luke as a brother, but now he was only getting on his nerves. How can the kid stay so calm in such a stressful situation?

"Leia is fine and so is the child, there's nothing to worry about. I'm monitoring them with the force as we speak."

"Yeah well I'm sorry, but us normal guys don't have your Jedi magics ok."

Han pushed his hair back haphazardly, his hair sticking out in all directions. Luke sighed and shook his head.

If someone doesn't come out soon and tell him everything's fine then he's really going to break the lock and get inside that room! To hell with procedures. He needed to know his son and wife are okay.

It was as if the galaxy was finally listening to him because as soon as he thought that the door opened. Han snapped his head towards it, as did everyone else. A droid stood by the doorway, waving them in.

"The father may now come in."

Han gulped, looked at Luke who was gesturing for him to go inside and he walked towards the door. Scratch what he just thought. He isn't ready for this!

Han entered the birthing chamber, the first thing he noticed was the sharp cries of a baby. The next thing he noticed was the large bed, and that became the only thing he paid attention to. Leia was lying on that bed, a bundle of blankets in her arms she was swaying from side to side as she cooed. Han walked closer and closer, almost afraid to disturb the peaceful atmosphere despite the insistent cries.

He took another step and the floor creaked under him, and that caused Leia to look up. The first thing he noticed was that her eyes looked incredibly tired, but there was still a wide smile on her lips. That only urged Han to leave his worries behind and begin to smile in return. Once he was by the bed he leaned down and gave his wife a soft kiss. It was short, but with it, he tried to show her how proud he was of her.

Once their lips separated he looked into her eyes for a brief second, trying to show as much love as he could through a mere glance. He isn't much of a romantic, and he couldn't really put his feelings into words something that has made their relationship a bit difficult at times, but at the very least he knows this way he can show how much he loves her. She seemed to get the gist as her smile broadened, and with that, he gazed down.

Nestled inside the blankets, in Leia's arms was such a small thing. A baby, his boy. Upon seeing him he couldn't help but notice the resemblance.

The boy, they had long decided to name Ben after the man that brought all of them together, has Leia's soft, yet strong eyes. However, that was where their similarities ended and his began. It might still be too early to know, and he doesn't anything about babies either, but the boy looks exactly like him. His ears, even though they were larger, his jaws, chin, and just his overall face is exactly like his.

As he looked at the crying Ben, he wondered how the hell he became a father. How the galaxy allowed him to become one?

"Do you want to hold him?" asked Leia.

Han tensed a little.

"I-I- well I mean I do it's just, that-well I don't want to drop him," he said nervously, yet trying to sound as confident as he possibly could.

Leia shook her head from side to side, amusement clear in her eyes. She doesn't take any mercy on him as she hands the crying baby to him. Han looks from one to the other unsure.

"How bout we recon-"

"Han."

"Fine," Han sighs.

He leans down and gingerly reaches for his son, weighing almost nothing. He hoists him up and Ben twists and turns in his grip. He's so small. Han thinks how easy it would be to break him. Or to drop him. The boy is vulnerable to everything. And so he does what feels most natural, he protects the kid by bringing him close to his chest. And just like that, Ben stops crying. The boy nuzzles up against his collarbone. He burps once, his dark eyes pinch shut, and he's out like a light.

"He likes you," Leia said softly.

Han looked at the sleeping face of his son, so serene and loved in his arms, knowing nothing will ever hurt him. Not while he is around.

"Yea, I guess he does."

~ _K~_

Father and son look at each other for a while, surprise and shock clear in both their eyes. Both men were so focused on each other, so preoccupied with their encounter, that neither noticed the others looking at them cautiously as if expecting a fight. It was as if for that brief moment nothing else seemed to exist in the lounge room but them, their reunion long overdue.

As Kylo looked into the eyes of the man in front of him he couldn't believe Han Solo was actually there, after so many years. There were so many reactions that could have come to him, but the first and main one was shock at how old he looked.

His hair was the same as he remembered, long and wavy, a bit like his, the only two differences being that his hair is considerably longer, the other being the colour. Han Solo has brown hair with white strands that dominate over the brown ones, while he has jet black hair. Ever since he could remember Han has always had bright, sparkly, and almost cocky eyes, promising all those who looked at them an adventure of a lifetime. However, now they were different. Having aged his eyes were wrinkly, and worn from old age, their old spark is long gone as they appear weary. Even their brown colour has faded somewhat, looking more gray than brown. Overall he is far older than he had expected him to look, almost a different man than he remembered, but then again it's been twenty-two years since he last saw him. He must think the same of him. Last time they saw each other he didn't even reach his shoulder, now he assumes he must tower over him.

"Ben," Han said once more in disbelief, cutting the silence like a knife.

Kylo didn't answer like before, all thoughts of nostalgia and memories that were coming back to him gone and anger overtook it as he tensed at the mention of the old forgotten name.

He clenched his jaw.

It has been eight years since he last heard that name since he killed Ben Solo and became Kylo. Eight years since anyone from his past recognized him, and he had wanted to keep it that way. He may not have joined Snoke but he still stood by his choice to destroy his old self. Ben Solo was weak, he always was. Looking to the horizon, reaching for the stars, and searching for adventure like his parents, his naivety, and softness evident in his wide innocent eyes. No, Ben Solo wouldn't have survived, he wouldn't have survived what he had to go through, in fact, he would have run to his parents for comfort long ago. He couldn't do that, doesn't have the luxury to seek anyone out anymore. It has taken him a long time to reach the realization that he is alone. He liked to have Poe as a friend, and it hurts that he's gone but he always knew Poe would just be a passing thing, a brief breeze in his turbulent world. Nothing ever stays for very long in his life, happiness, friendship, family, belonging, understanding, all these things are a luxury Snoke made sure he could never afford.

"You know each other?"

Finn's voice sounded louder than it probably was in the silence, snapping both men out of their shock.

Kylo's eyes turned from confusion and shock to bitter coldness and anger. Likewise, Han frowned at him as his eyes focused.

"You could say that," Han responded, stepping back to give them space.

The first to come out of the service area was Finn, who was in front. The next one was Rey, but she didn't move, instead, she turned to glanced at him, worry clear in her eyes. For a second he looked at her confused, not understanding why she was looking at him like that until her eyes shifted to his chest, as if to answer his unspoken question. Kylo followed her eyes and he instantly understood. In his large hand he held her smaller one tightly, something he hadn't even realized or didn't even remember doing.

As if it had burned him, he quickly let go of her hand. His eyes went up to hers, his anger now directed at her. A small part of him felt guilty when Rey looked at him taken aback, and with a hurt confusion however, he couldn't very well react any other way. He couldn't be weak, couldn't have others thinking he sought physical comfort, and besides, how dare she assume he needs her help?

Kylo watched as Rey pulled herself together and her brows crashed together and she turned his anger back at him. Rey didn't say anything as she angrily turned her back on him and got out of the service area. He felt a tiny bit guilty, but he didn't dwell on it and he followed after her, but before he got out he grabbed BB-8 and with incredible effort, he lifted the little droid and got him out of the hole.

"Who are you?" Han asked Finn and Rey, yet his eyes never left Kylo as they followed him.

Finn opened his mouth to answer but then stopped.

Once Kylo got out of the service area he walked up to Han Solo and stood in front of him, towering over the man. He was clearly using his usual intimidating stance. Han, however, wasn't fazed as he kept looking up at his eyes, and meeting the anger in them like no one else had ever dared to before.

Seeing that his friend was in danger, the large walking carpet stood behind Han, his form towering over even Kylo. Seeing Chewbacca is a shock as well, but he didn't care so much about him at the moment. Not paying any attention to the Wookiee, Chewie began to growl lowly in warning. He knew the Wookiee could never truly hurt him out of his own volition, but he undoubtedly would if any danger were to befall Han.

"Are we okay?" Asked Finn, looking from one to the other worriedly, snapping them out of their little confrontation once more.

"No," Kylo responded and didn't even give Han another glance as he sidestepped him and the Wookiee. He had nothing to say to them, he didn't even want to be near them because the longer he remained in this place the harder it was to breathe, and the more likely he is in doing something he might end up regretting. There is no point in dwelling in the past, no point in bringing it back to life.

He angrily made it to the archway that would lead him to the ramp, and out of the ship and as far away as possible. His mission is done, Poe is dead, it's time he goes home before this gets out of hand. However, as he neared the archway Han spoke up.

"Is that any way to say hello to your father?"

Kylo stopped dead in his tracks.

Everything seemed to still, as the atmosphere took a dip. He could hear everyone behind him tense, and for a second the barrier between him and the force nearly broke.

Did he just hear what he thought he heard? It couldn't be right, he must have misheard and yet he knew he didn't.

Did the man that tossed him in the Academy when he was only eight because it was easier than putting up with his abilities just called himself his father? Han Solo, the man who has absolutely no parenting skills? That man that spent most of his life fearing his strength in the force, treating him like there was something wrong with him. Wishing that he had another son, one that was more like him and less difficult. The very man he looked up to only for him to discard him like those precious items he's smuggled around the galaxy all his life. That man, who just now, after twenty-two years is taking up the title of father.

It was a miracle that he didn't snap there and then because if he had he was sure the Falcon wouldn't have survived it.

He felt a wave of long-buried anger rise up to the surface, all-encompassing. His hands balled up into fists to stop himself from destroying anything around him but it was proving to be difficult. His anger was quickly becoming irrational, something that can't be easily calmed. The darkness calling to him to give in to his actions as he used to before, but he fought it. He knew that there was more to it than the word Han just used, there were years upon years of resentment and pain all bottled up inside him that wasn't all Han's fault, he was just the last spark he needed to blow over. He needed to get out of here, find something he could beat into an unrecognizable heap.

Kylo did not so much as turn as he spoke, anger evident in his voice.

"For your sake, I suggest you never use that word again."

With that, he stomped out of the ship.

_~R~_

"Ben…" the man whispered, sounding somewhat miserable, a strange thing to see from such a hardened man.

Rey looked at Finn and the Wookiee that was standing beside him. She saw that Finn had the same confused expression in his face, and turned to look at her as if to ask her if she understood what was going on. Rey has absolutely no clue as to what had happened, all she understood is that this man is the father of Kylo yet they don't seem to get along. That was especially strange for her. She always thought the relationship between parent and child is supposed to be a tight one, definitely not like this one. Kylo was furious, for a second there she thought he would snap and physically hurt the man. She was thankful he didn't, she knew he could take the man out but the Wookiee? She's seen a few Wookiees in her life and she knows that they can be quite vicious when they wanted to be. She has no doubt in her mind that if it came down to it he would kill them.

The man shook his head as if shaking the pain and shock away, almost as if putting aside the entire confrontation that happened a mere seconds ago. At Least for now. It wasn't at all odd for her, he strikes her as the type of man that doesn't like to dwell on things too much.

"Who are you two anyway, and how did you find this ship?"

He turned to face them, his eyes hardening. It should make her nervous, but it actually made her feel better. She didn't know why but it just felt wrong to see him so shaken up, he isn't the type of man to look like that.

"Right here." She saw no reason not to tell the truth, not to mention that he seems like the type of man to catch a lie with ease. "I mean, down on the surface. Niima Outpost, to be specific."

Dropping his lower jaw to show his disbelief, he stared back at her. "Jakku? That junkyard?"

Rey grimaced inside a little. Why do people keep calling her home a junkyard? Sure it may be one, but couldn't they find a better description? Calling it that made her feel dirty, for if that's her home then what did that make her?

Looking away from them, their captor addressed his towering cohort. "Told ya we should've double-checked the Western Reaches! Just lucky we were in the general vicinity when the ship powered up and its beacon snapped on." He turned back to Rey. She was trying to make sense of the mismatched pair standing before her and failing utterly.

A wookiee, and a worn-out man who is somehow the father of Kylo, their companion in this ragtag team. something didn't make sense, there was something she wasn't getting, something that was said but she had missed.

"Who had it?" he continued. "Ducain?"

Again, she thought, there is no reason to lie. "I stole it from a salvage dealer named Unkar Plutt."

Brows narrowed. "From who?"

"Look." Rey lowered her hands so she could spread her arms wide. "I don't know all the details for sure. I'm not privy to Plutt's business. But people say that Plutt stole this ship from the Irving Boys, who stole it from Ducain."

"Who stole it from me!"

Their captor's voice was filled with righteous indignation. To Rey, it sounded a little forced. Definitely, this man was not now and never had been a stormtrooper or anything like it. What he had been, maybe, was someone not unlike herself. A bit of a businessman, a bit of a con man, a bit of an adventurer. And since he was older, it was only reasonable to assume that he had been a bit more of all of those things than herself. What his intentions toward them were? She could not yet guess. But the fact that he didn't know who Unkar Plutt was was definitely a plus on his side. He would be unlikely to immediately turn them over or try to sell them to someone he didn't know. Where he stood in relation to the First Order remained to be seen. Thus far, at least, he didn't strike her as someone overly interested in politics. There is also, the matter of his relationship with Kylo. the relationship of both men shouldn't matter to her, but she couldn't shake off the curiosity and unease it brought her. There was definitely a long story there, and not the usual falling out. No, there had been too much anger in Kylo's eyes for any of this to be normal, but then again both men seem far from normal.

Her hurried speculation as to their captor's possible motives, as well as his relationship with Kylo was interrupted when he took a step toward her. Finn tensed, but neither the blaster nor the man's free hand came up.

"Well, you tell him when you see him again, you tell him that Han Solo just stole back the Millennium Falcon for good!"

Turning, he put his blaster inside his holster and headed for the cockpit, his large associate at his side. Either he was satisfied with her answers, she thought, or he didn't care. Either way, she was relieved he put his blaster away. She didn't dwell on her relief though, not with the revelation she's just heard.

Han Solo.

Her face split into a wide smile, forgetting everything else, except for the fact that Kylo had clearly said that name earlier but she hadn't even paid any attention to him, too focused on the confrontation.

She grew up hearing stories about this man from the pilots that would come to Jakku. They always spoke of him in awe and reverence, and now here he was in the flesh. A legend of the Rebellion against the Empire. Trader, pirate, con man, and fighter extraordinaire. It was hard to believe he was real. Han Solo was history come to life. And his companion, Chewbacca, is also here. This is incredible.

Rey looked at Finn. he wasn't smiling like she was, but he did look impressed but also confused as to why they had been left behind.

Without another word, they broke for the cockpit.

Both of them caught up to the unlikely pair in the corridor. Wanting desperately to confront their captor, if captor was what he was, considering that he wasn't acting much like one.

Rey could hardly contain her excitement.

"This is the Millennium Falcon? I didn't—I didn't make the connection when we stole...when we came on board." She could not keep herself from staring at the pilot. After all, it wasn't every day in the galaxy that one met a living legend. In point of fact, it was her first living legend. For a living legend, a part of her mused, his appearance was more than a little dishevelled. Almost as much as that of his companion.

"You're Han Solo," she said excitedly.

"I used to be," Han Solo huffed bitterly, walking off on his own, and leaving them behind once more.

"Han Solo?" Finn asked hesitantly, stopping to look at her. "The Rebellion general?"

Rey stopped.

"No," Rey broke, half accusingly, half admiringly. "The smuggler!"

"Huh?"

Finn looked at her confused, and Rey wanted to roll her eyes. For a rebel he sure doesn't know enough about the Resistance heroes.

"Wasn't he a war hero? In the fight against the Old Empire?"

It was in that instant that Rey realized what ship this was.

"The Millennium Falcon." She could not keep the wonder out of her voice. "This is the ship that made the Kessel Run in fourteen parsecs."

"Twelve parsecs," Han corrected from the cockpit.

Rey could barely keep her excitement bottled up inside her. She didn't want to come off as some little girl who was about to watch her first hologram, at the same time she couldn't help it. She wanted to ask him so many questions, wanted to know if everything they say about him is true. Did he truly face off the entire empire with just a blaster, his friends, and a whole lot of luck? Is it true that he managed to smuggl-

"Hey! Some idiot installed a compressor on the ignition line!"

Her train of thought was snapped in two as Han walked into the corridor once more.

"Unkar Plutt did." Rey saw Finn shoot her a look and she glanced away. "I'd spent some time poking around all the ships parked at the outpost. Mostly at night." She brightened.

She knew she sounded too excited, and annoying but she really couldn't help it. Here, in front of her, is finally someone that understands the mechanics of ships like she does, if not more. There are plenty of people on Jakku who know their way around a ship, but they never cared to talk to her, she is just a sand rat after all.

Han nodded knowingly. "What idiot puts a compressor on an ignition line?"

She nodded in agreement. "I thought it was a mistake, too. Puts too much stress on the hyperdrive flow."

"… Stress on the hyperdrive flow," Han echoed, reaching the same conclusion at the same time. For an instant, he looked puzzled and just a tad impressed. However, his curiosity didn't last long. His brows pulled together once more.

"Chewie, put 'em in a pod and send them back to Jakku. Or anywhere else they want to go."

Everything seemed to crash and burn in the wake of those words.

"Wait, no!" Rey moved toward him. A stern stare halted her in her tracks but she wouldn't be silenced. He may be a hero and her idol but there are more pressing matters at hand. Duty before anything else. "We need your help!"

Holding her ground, she pointed to BB-8. "This droid has to get to the nearest Resistance base as soon as possible. He's carrying a map that leads to the present location of Luke Skywalker!"

Everything seemed to quiet at her words.

In an instant and in response to Rey's distressed request, all the hardness seemed to drain out of him. For a moment Han's eyes weren't looking at Rey, but as if he was looking far into the distance, or rather, to some far off memory. She worried that she had said the wrong thing, but she didn't dwell on it as Finn spoke up.

"You are the Han Solo who fought with the Rebellion? If so, then you knew him."

That seemed to have done the trick.

"Knew him?" The far off stare had gone hazy, the strong voice soft. "Yeah, I knew Luke."

"Well, then," Finn continued, "maybe you could—"

Finn's voice broke off as a distant but distinct metallic thunk reached them inside the Falcon. Snapping back to the present, Han was all business again as he scowled in the direction of the ship's loading ramp.

"Don't tell me a rathtar's gotten loose." Without another word he vacated the corridor, hurrying back the way he'd come. Everyone else followed, with BB-8 bringing up the rear. Neither Rey nor the droid had the slightest idea of what was going on. What in the stars is a rathtar?

"Wait, wait," Finn said.

Han ignored him as he exited the Falcon onto one of the service decks of the enormous freighter and headed directly for the nearest control panel.

"Hold up now. I need to be sure what you said. What's gotten loose?"

"Rathtar," Han replied curtly.

"No." Finn was shaking his head. "You're not hauling rathtars."

Han spoke without breaking stride. "I'm hauling rathtars."

Rey watched as host of images revealed both the interior and exterior of the hulking freighter in the control screens. Her eyes shifted to the other screen, revealing an approaching nonmilitary transport. The sleek craft made its way along the hull. She didn't recognize the ships' design, so she focused on Han instead. The pilot's expression showed that he was not pleased.

"You recognize the arrival," Finn said. It was not a question. "From the look on your face, I can tell that you wish you didn't."

"You could say that," Han replied. "It's the Guavian Death Gang." He looked over at the Wookiee, who moaned confirmation. "Yeah. They must've tracked us from Nantoon. You'd think travelling through hyperspace you could throw people off. Not these guys. That's never good. They're persistent. I hate that."

"Hate what?"

Han didn't look at Finn.

"When someone who wants to kill us finds us." Abandoning the cockpit, he and the Wookiee headed off toward a circular corridor opening. Once again, Finn and Rey found themselves reduced to following.

"What's a rathtar?" Rey asked Finn, needing to be in the loop. They were now hurrying down a passageway that Kylo had disappeared in. Rey almost stopped at the realization that they had forgotten about Kylo in all their excitement.

Ever since she saw him back on Jakku she was curious to know who the man is, and now she has a piece of the puzzle.

Father, Han Solo had identified himself as Kylo's father, but then he didn't call him Kylo, he used another name, what was it? Oh yes, Ben. Han had called him Ben, and that name had angered Kylo exponentially. She found she liked that name better, but anyway. Why was there so much friction between father and son, she didn't know, but she does know that Kylo keeps getting more interesting by the second.

It was Han who replied to her question. "You want the scientific description? They're big and dangerous and ugly."

"Okay….," she responded, that wasn't much of an explanation. "Why would anyone want something big, dangerous, and ugly? And be willing to pay for it?"

"I don't know kid, I'll ask a buyer next time I see em," he responded sarcastically.

Rey was a little annoyed by that answer but she waved her emotion away.

Finn moved closer to her. "Ever hear of the Trillia Massacre?"

She shook her head. "No."

"Good," he replied. And that was the extent of his explanation, which only brought forth her annoyance once more. She so hated not knowing. Fortunately, she at least now understood how dangerous these rathtar are.

"We should find Kylo and warn him." If he is out there on his own, and there are dangerous creatures then he really needs their help, blaster or no blaster.

She turned and watched as Finn nodded in agreement, but he didn't look any less terrified at the idea of going to look for Kylo. However, Han didn't seem at all fazed.

"Kylo? Is that the name he goes by nowadays?" he wondered, sounding more curious of the name than concerned about his son's safety.

Both she and Finn looked at the man, confusion clear in their eyes. His son is in possible danger and he didn't seem at all worried.

Han waved them away dismissively.

"Don't worry about him, kid's safer than any of us are about to be. He can take care of himself."

She was a little surprised by that answer, Who exactly is Kylo that he can undoubtedly protect himself from any danger, and how come she's never heard of him? Never in her life has she heard of Han Solo having a son or a child of any kind, or even a family. He didn't seem like the type to have one, so who is Kylo?

"Wait, you're telling me he can take care of himself from the rathtar," asked Finn incredulous. "He's armed with just a blaster, even a hundred of those won't save him. How can he defend himself?"

Han didn't stop to look at Finn again, but he did seem annoyed by him.

"Because," Han answered vaguely, and quickened his pace. "I doubt either of you can say the same so unless you want the rathtar to find us I suggest you hurry up and stop asking questions."

Both Rey and Finn looked at one another for a brief second, wondering if the man was for real, but when they heard a loud shriek from the rathtar not far from where they were, they quickened their pace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really happy I could get a chapter out on Christmas because I wanted to wish everyone a happy holidays. Whether you celebrate it or not, have fun today!
> 
> In regards to the story there were some revelations here and there. I really wanted to show the contrast in how Rey and Ben look at Han Solo, and without spoiling anything i want to say that both of them have a biased view of him.
> 
> Anyways I hope you liked this chapter, I am very happy you're all liking it, so please keep commenting and see you guys next time!


	7. Chapter 7

He walked through the halls, anger clear in his eyes, and through his footsteps as he kept stomping heavily on the metal floor.

His vision was blurry from anger his breath coming out harsh. He didn't really know where he was going, the interior of the ship is different than any he had been in before. Usually, freighters are easy and straightforward to navigate around, this one though is all over the place. There were hallways were there shouldn't be, counsels that don't make sense with their location, strange hisses and sounds coming from all around the ship. A ship such as this could only belong to a man such as Han Solo. disorganized, dirty, old, and worn out from too many voyages across the galaxy, just like Solo.

Kylo's clenched fists tightened to the point that he thought his fingers might snap in half, his face pulled into a scowl. His facial expression betrays him, that's what he's been told often. He can remain cool and collected through his action if he focused enough, but not through his face. His emotions always come through if not from his facial expression then in his eyes. Wearing a helmet made this predicament easier and for that reason, he wished he had his old helmet, the one he wore when he was one of the knights of Ren. When he had joined the dark side, a different man from a different life.

He thought he would never really need it, but now he did, but unfortunately for him, he had long destroyed it along with the rest of his clothes. He was afraid they could track him through those objects somehow, but he also didn't and doesn't have any intention of ever going back to that life again. That helmet belonged to another man, to Kylo Ren a member of the Knights of Ren.

Kylo turned into another hallway, his mind easily going to the knights as he preferred that over thinking about Han Solo.

He had only been twenty-one years old, only a boy, when he had joined the knights, well more like became their acolyte. One becomes a knight of Ren after the completion of a series of tests designed to tear a person in half. Yes, he had been young but with the help of the master of the Knights of Ren, a scarred man who calls himself Ren, he managed to learn and become one of them.

Destroy all other emotions but pain, and anger. Bather yourself in it, let it consume you, that's what Ren had told him. In order to become a knight of Ren, he had to consume everything around him, be a force to be reckoned and feared by all those who gaze upon him. Destroy, and kill indiscriminately but do not question why you do so. There is no other life outside the order, no free thought, nor free will. He must become an instrument of the Darkside by living with these principles. Accept them and allow them to shape him, to change him into a knight of Ren. Only then can he truly be free.

Kylo sighed and shook his head, his eyes closing.

Old memories of people screaming and begging for mercy as he merely looked down at them resurfaced. He still remembers each and every one of their faces as they haunt him in his sleep. Of how he looked down at their terrified expression as he cut them in half with his lightsaber. There was no mercy, not among the knights, not in the First Order.

He was wrong, thinking of Han Solo is easier than of the knights, and his time among them, or perhaps it's easier not to think of anything at all.

With his eyes opening he continued to walk, aimlessly, his mind blank.

He's looking for any signs of an escape pod, or another ship, or anything that can get him out of this situation. Or, something to distract him from everything. He often wished the galaxy would take pity on him, and listened to him for once, but what happened next was not at all what he was thinking.

A loud spine chilling howl reverberated throughout the entire ship, calling all to attention.

Kylo stopped, the howl sounding familiar, but he couldn't pinpoint it. That is until he heard loud thumps, and howls coming from behind him and he turned, his hand going to his blaster.

What he saw made him freeze, and his eyes widen. A rathtar was making its way towards him.

It was so large, so much so that it could barely fit in the cargo corridor. Large tentacles worked to roll it's large body around, it's enormous mouth, for it was all he could pay attention to, was wide open as if redying to eat him whole. It's loud screech and howls making him shiver, and tense up.

He isn't a rathtar expert but he knows what they are and what they can do. From what he learned at the academy, they are ravenous and persistent eaters, capable of consuming virtually anything that they can fit into their mouths, which are shaped and lined with rows of razor-sharp teeth. They are incredibly dangerous even to force users due to their speed, persistence, large and heavy body as well as thick hide which makes them immune to blasters. One rathtar can easily overwhelm a young Jedi, and eat an entire crew, who in the stars would have something like that on their ship?

Of course, there was only one man crazy enough.

He's going to kill Han Solo!

Snapping out of his shock he turned and bolted the opposite way, running away as fast as he could. It did irk him a little, and could only imagine how stupid he must look running away from a large rolling ball of razor-sharp teeth, but there wasn't much he could do. He can't face the rathtar, not with just a blaster, and without the use of the force. All he can hope to do is retrace his steps and make it back to the Fal-

Kylo shook his head stubbornly, anger consuming him at the thought of who was inside the Falcon. He isn't going to run back to the Falcon, not-

The rathtar howl, a tentacle reached for his leg and barely missed by a hair. His eyes widened at how close that was.

He hated to admit it, but it seems he has no other choice but to run back to the Falcon, that is unless he wants to be eaten alive. But before he could do that he needs to stall the beast, if only for a second, enough to give him time to distance himself from it.

Kylo grabbed for his blaster and unholstered it. He turned his head to look at the rathtar as he kept running away from it. Without the force, everything's harder, but he's got great aim even without it. He closed one eye as his finger began to pull down on the trigger. However, before he could shoot, a tentacle he hadn't noticed shot up and tangled itself around his ankle.

Kylos eyes widened. Could his day get any worse?

The rathtar yanked on his ankle and he fell on his shoulder with a loud thump.

He grimaced, pain shooting up his arm, probably dislocating it, but he couldn't dwell on it as the tentacle dragged him across the floor, bringing him closer to the rathtar.

His empty hand tried to claw at the floor, hoping to find something to latch on but to no luck. So instead he turned on the spot, his back dragging on the metal floor, bolts digging and scratching his back painfully. He took a deep breath to prevent himself from panicking. If there's one good thing he learned from Snoke, it was to keep his composure under stressful, and dangerous situations.

So with his mind somewhat cleared, he brought his blaster up but a sharp groan through gritted teeth from him was all that came instead. He could barely raise his arm, his shoulder throbbing from pain, confirming that his shoulder is indeed dislocated.

He growled in frustration as the dumb beast continued to drag him across the ship's corridor, going to who knows where perhaps to join other rathtars to share the meal. Who knows but he isn't going to wait and find out.

Seeing as his shooting arm is dislocated he has no other choice but to grab the blaster with his other hand. He isn't kidding himself, he isn't exactly an expert marksman, he can't shoot equally well with both hands, but at the very least he can shoot some part of the rathtar and hope it lets go of him.

With his shooting arm resting on his chest, useless, his other hand pointed the blaster at the rathtar's large body.

His hand was shaky, not used to holding a blaster, but he managed to steady it enough to shoot.

A red blast shot straight to the rathtar's body, not piercing its skin but it was enough to burn it's hide.

The beast howled in pain, let go of his ankle, and retracted it's tentacle back to its body. Before it did that, however, the rathtar raised Kylo and tossed him away.

Kylo groaned as his back hit the cold metal floor, his dislocated shoulder crying in pain, and from mistreatment. If he wasn't long used to pain he would have cried from agony. He doesn't have time to complain about his injuries though, so instead, he reached for his shoulder and pulled it back to its socket. There was a loud crack followed by a pained groan from him. He saw stars, but he didn't have a second to even compose himself as a large howl pierced the silence.

He's really starting to hate this entire krifing day!

He leaned his head up and watched as the rathtar began to turn to face him, it's body appearing larger than before almost as if it were showing him how mad it is at him.

Kylo reached for his blaster. With his good arm, he can now shoot it somewhere vital, but as he reached for it he found it was nowhere to be found. He looked to where the rathtar had let go of him and watched as his blaster was crushed by the beast's large body. With it went his remaining patience.

His eyes narrowed, and his brows furrowed in anger as he glared at the creature making its way towards him. He slowly brought himself up on his feet, no longer scared of the rathtar as it rolled to him at full speed.

First his ship, now his blaster. No, he's done running away from this useless dumb beast, done with it all. This damn mission that turned out to be futile, the two stowaways that think this is all some big, fun adventure. Done with Han Solo, with the idiot pilot killing himself on some stupid mission to find Luke Skywalker. Mad at himself for putting his neck on the line, and for what? So the First Order can find out about him and track him down once more? They must have his face by now, so it's only a matter of time before Snoke sends the knights after him. And with this new development, not just the First Order knows about him, but the Resistance. Han Solo will no doubt go back to the Resistance and tell them all about him, tell _her_ about him. He screwed up big time. He can't go back to the same life he had before this. Can't do anything but get dragged into everything he's worked so hard to run away from. He laid low, worked as a smuggler, earned a living, it seems that wasn't enough.

All he had wanted was some peace.

He didn't have to reach deep inside himself to find his connection with the force, all the anger he felt at that moment did it for him, and he allowed it. He let it consume him as he was once taught. Allowing it to flow through him. Before he had only allowed a sliver to his connection to the force go through the crack, but this time he was almost letting it all go through.

It felt exhilarating as always, but also painful. Most Jedi believe that using the dark side of the force is painless and intoxicating and while it is the latter, it's not at all painless. Having so much raw, and emotion fulled power inside one's self can be incredibly painful, and overwhelming if one isn't used to it. Thankfully he knows how to channel it, how to use it, and got used to the feeling long ago. Like an old forgotten friend.

Kylo didn't even put his hand up, instead, he merely opened his eyes and the rathtar froze in place before him.

He watched coldly as the beast's eyes snapped from one side to the other, it's mouth hanging open as if confused as to what was happening. It has not yet realized that it's now at his mercy.

Sweat was beading down his forehead from exertion from holding the beast in place, which only became harder when the rathtar realized the situation and attempted to move it's tentacles, trying to get free.

The task of keeping the beast levitated is a challenge. It's been a long time since he's used the force like this, so his body is struggling. It had long forgotten what it felt like to wield such power, to have a life at his mercy.

He should have stopped there, simply let the rathtar go and run for it, but he found he couldn't. The darkness in him wouldn't allow him to let go, it needed to be sated, to be unleashed somehow or it would destroy him. That is the price of using the dark side, of giving in. Everything always comes with a price, especially power.

Using the force, Kylo closed his eyes and looked inside the rathtar, bridging his mind to his. It's primarily a Jedi ability, one that allows them to connect and communicate with lesser beings. Young Jedi's would often be instructed in communicating with animals, and he was no different.

The first time he had done this he had done it in the Jedi temple when he was a young boy. Luke had stood behind him, guiding him the whole way as he urged him to connect his mind with the orbak's, for that was what he was practicing on, and feel the life essence inside it. It's a lesson meant to teach young Jedis the perfection, and beauty of nature and the force part in all of it. Ben Solo had been awed, as he felt the orbak's life in his hand, it's lungs as it breathed, it's strong legs and neck and it's beating heart. Luke had instructed them to never disrupt the natural way of things, to understand their place in the force. Of course, such a skill could be used for other things.

He felt then, on the old freighter, as he felt before, the life essence of the rathtar. While the orbak's life essence was beautiful, the rathtar's was tainted and blackened, yet he could feel a purpose in it. He reached further, feeling the organs of the beast working overtime, yet in harmony. He could feel it's fear, knew that it was no longer interested in him, he just wanted to run and regroup with the others of its kind. It thought he would be an easy target being all alone, but it had been wrong, and now it just wanted to be free. A different man would have let the rathtar go, would have taken mercy on it, but not him.

His eyes snapped open and he stretched his hold on the beast further and further until he found what he was looking. The beating organ that gave the rathtar life.

It felt weird to have such an important organ in one's grasp, but he didn't really feel anything at that moment. His eyes grew cold as he gazed at the frightened beast trying to get free.

It does not deserve mercy.

Kylo's hand came up, and he slowly balled it up into a fist, the force imitating his movement.

The beast howled in terror and pain as its heart was slowly squeezed by the force, its eyes going from one corner to the other in utter fear, it's tentacles swaying around. Anyone would have felt sorry even for such a beast, but not him.

Mercilessly he closed his fist with a finality. He felt as life left the beast body slowly, draining out of him like blood, slow and agonizing. A Jedi should be appalled by such a thing, anyone should be disgusted by such an act of cruelty. He watched as the rathtar's eyes rolled up and its body slumped on his hold, dead.

Kylo felt the connection break but didn't think even feel anything and he let out a deep breath and let go of the dead carcass, the heavy body falling to the ground uselessly.

He barely stopped to look at the dead body. Indifferent.

He worked on closing the connection to the force but it was harder than ever before as a part of him refused to let go of such power. The more rational one, however, knows that if he doesn't close the connection it'll consume him, and possibly-

Kylo stopped suddenly.

Everything around him seemed to get cold, and the lights appeared as they had dim ever so slightly. Every muscle in his body froze on the spot, his eyes widening in fear as sweat rolled down his forehead. It was distant, and it almost felt like a whisper but it was there nevertheless. The ever distinctive feeling of a familiar mind brushing against his mind, or more like clawing at it, as if threatening to destroy everything.

' _Kylo Ren,'_

A deep voice whispered in his head.

For a brief second, he felt his heart stop.

_~R~_

"You shut the hatch behind us!" Han instructed Rey, who nodded a swift response. To Finn, he snapped, "You take care of Chewie!" Half slipping free of his burden, half throwing the wounded copilot in Finn's direction, Han ran up the ramp.

Nearly collapsing beneath the Wookiee's weight, Finn did his best to help the moaning Chewbacca stay upright as the two of them staggered the rest of the way up the ramp.

"How do I do that?" Finn called after the pilot. However, Han didn't answer, and Rey didn't move to help him either.

Chewbacca, on the other hand, groaned and bellowed. She understood everything the exasperated, and wounded Wookie was telling Finn but she really didn't have time to translate for Finn, not when there's a hungry rathtar and a murderous gang after them.

"That's right… for sure… yeah, I'll do that… no problem," Finn huffed, and Rey did feel somewhat guilty of leaving Finn behind, and she ran down the same corridor as Han.

When she had met Han Solo, a personal hero of hers, she hadn't expected this whole meeting to go quite like this. Being chased by hungry beast that nearly killed Finn, to dodging every blast from the gang, she really hadn't pictured this situation in her head before. She knows that Han is a swindler and not very much liked by a few people across the galaxy, but this is a it much. Still, she didn't want to complain too much. Even though she has come close to dying at least three times in the last ten minutes this is really exhilarating and almost fun. She never felt her heart, and adrenaline pump so fast in her life. To be running alongside Han Solo, it really is a dream come true. In Jakku she never had this kind of blood-pumping excitement before, the most being the rare times she came about a challenge when scavenging but it never compared to this. It almost made her want to stay and never go back to the desert planet.

In the cockpit, Han was hitting one control after another, bringing the Falcon back online. She watched as he was startled by her presence, but she didn't stop to say anything nor for an invitation as she settled on the copilot's chair.

"What are you doing?" Han gestured back in the direction of the lounge. "Passengers back in there."

Expertly sliding her fingers over the counsel controls, she spoke while barely glancing in his direction.

"The guy who last had your ship installed a fuel pump. If we don't prime it, we're not going anywhere." she looked across at him sympathetically.

"You could use a copilot."

Han frowned at her.

"I got one. He's back there," he huffed stubbornly but after realizing that she isn't going nowhere, and he really needs help, he sighed and shook his head.

"Fine," Han shouted back, and she wanted to grin. She knows he was only being prickly to sound tough. "Be that way!"

Han's hands flew over the controls. "Fuel pump's primed. Watch thrust from your end: we're gonna jump to lightspeed."

Rey froze a little, confused.

She knows a lot about ships, all kinds of ships. But in all her studies she has never come across the manoeuvre he had just proposed.

"From inside the hangar?" is that even possible."

Han didn't even look her way, focused entirely on the controls.

"I never answered that question until after I've done it."

She didn't argue with him as she began to set out on her task. She's never once thought of the possibility of jumping to lightspeed inside a hangar, and she guessed, in theory, it could be possible. However, she never would have been brave enough to test it herself.

Rey pushed a few buttons, the ship ready to leave this wretched place, until a thought came to her, something important they had forgotten.

"We need to get Kylo." She glanced to look at the pilot, worry clear in her eyes. She may dislike the guy, but they can't just leave him behind.

Han stopped imputing information in the counsel, and gave her a sideways glance with a raised brow.

"Why are you so concerned about him? Are you two together or something?"

For a second Rey thought she misunderstood what Han said, and so she looked at him confused. It was only after a few seconds that it clicked and she blushed.

"What? NO! I just don't want him to die!" She said flustered.

In a relationship with that man? As if! She couldn't even imagine it. If she were ever in a relationship with anyone it definitely wouldn't be with a brooding man like that.

Rey shook her head, hastily to change topics.

"And aren't _you_ his father? Shouldn't you be somewhat concerned?"

It was almost as if he hadn't heard her as he looked at her with a raised brow, and continued to flick buttons on the panel.

"Kid should be-"

Before Han could finish his sentence they heard the ramp lower, and a loud set of footsteps walking inside the ship.

"Oh, you're here, great! Come help me with this thing!" They heard Finn yell as Chewie roared in anger.

Kylo, for she knew it had to be him, no other could have such loud footsteps, didn't pay attention to Finn.

"what are you waiting for?" Kylo asked from the lounge, Rey knew he was addressing them specifically.

"GET THIS PIECE OF JUNK OUT OF HERE!"

Rey winced a little from the loudness of his voice, meanwhile, she watched as Han rolled his eyes and continued to make calculations.

"Well, there he is, now let's go."

Heavy thump penetrated the cockpit, indicating that something was moving in its direction. This was confirmed a moment later by Rey' scream in response to the appearance of a giant radial mouth that all but covered the forward port. The tooth-filled mouth belonged to a rathtar, who was chewing its damndest to get to them. Designed to sustain against meteoric impacts, the port suffered little damage.

"This is _not_ how I thought this day would go," he muttered.

Seeing the Falcon was powered up, a handful of the gang members took a chance in emerging from cover to fire at the ship. Thankfully she had put the shields up so the blaster shots made no damage to the hull.

As far as Rey knew, there was nothing more to do or prepare for. There was nothing else to do but to sit back and hope that they don't crash against the hangar, or a meteorite or a planet, or a sun, or anything. She trusts Han. If he's made it this far living this recklessly then he must have an ounce of knowledge.

"Hang in back there, we're leaving in a hurry!"

A grunt from Finn, a roar from Chewie, but nor response from Kylo.

" _No problem!_ " Finn said, his voice sounding like his throat was being obstructed somehow.

Rey looked back worriedly, but she didn't have time to worry as Han grabbed the main hyperdrive control.

"Come on," he murmured, as he pulled.

Nothing happened.

"What?" He growled, looking around the controls confused.

Reaching across to his side of the counsel, Rey calmly activated a control he had not touched and spoke calmly.

"Compressor."

He glared at her for a second and she shrank a little. She hadn't meant to anger him, she just wanted to help.

He turned away and slowly pulled back on the drive control for the second time, and she watched as he half-smiled at her.

An enormous, overpowering thundering sound filled the cargo hangar as the Falcon's engine came to life. Deciding to rush to the ship, the remaining gang members choose an unfortunate angle that put them directly behind the engine. Everything seemed to get burned by the Falcon as it energized, and vanished from the hangar. As for the rathtar, it fell apart as the Falcon jumped through it, leaving smears behind.

And so they were

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope people are reading the Rise of Kylo Ren comics because I'll be making a few references to it, but if you haven't don't worry. I will be explaining everything as I go along but it will be easier to understand if you have read the comic.
> 
> Also, I finally finished planning out everything for this story, and I just want to let you guys know that the story will diverge from canon after TFA which makes everything really interesting, and exciting.
> 
> I am really happy, and thankful for everyone who took the time to comment and like the story and even read it. I too wasn't so happy with TROS so it's nice to write this fic for closure.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading, please comment and see you guys next time!


	8. Chapter 8

_~RE~_

The fleet of Star Destroyers stood around the white world. The planet was spectacular and isolated, with a mean surface temperature varying from merely cold to permanently artic. It was obvious that the planet had been altered. Its mountain tunnelled into, its glaciers hacked, and its valleys modified until it no longer resembled its original form. Those who had remade it had renamed it.

_Starkiller base_

Hollowed out of one snow-covered mountain was a central control facility. At its heart was a great assembly chamber. At present, it was occupied by only three figures. One was Ren, wearing nothing but his dark pants, cape, and silver helmet, leaving his heavily scarred torso bare. The second was General Hux.

Seated on the raised platform that was at the centre of the chamber was the blue holo of Supreme Leader Snoke. Tall and gaunt, he was humanoid but not really human. The hood of the dark robe he wore was down, leaving visible his pale face so aged it verged on translucence. Poorly reconstructed, the broken nose added to the asymmetry of the damaged visage. So did the position of the left eye, which was situated lower than the right. Beneath gray eyebrows, they were blue eyes. Long since healed over, old cuts and wounds marred the chin and forehead.

Seated in shadow, the tall slender form loomed over the other two men. Other than the face, only long fingers showed from beneath the dark robe.

"The droid will soon be in the hands of the Resistance," Snoke claimed, his voice deep, and very much that of someone in complete control, "giving the enemy the means to locate Skywalker and bring to their cause a most powerful ally. If Skywalker returns, the new Jedi order will rise."

Ren stood impassive, not commenting. His arms folded over his chest.

Hux dipped his head by way of apology and took a step towards the throne.

"Supreme leader, I take full responsibility for th-"

"General!' The holo form of Snoke stood up abruptly, cutting him off. "Thanks to your incapability to acquire the droid, our strategy must now change."

Hux shifted on his feet, aware that he had just been spared and unknown but certainly unpleasant fate. Ren watched as the redhead spoke up immediately.

"The weapon. We have it. It's ready. I believe the time has come to use it," the redhead straightened his back, looking every bit the General he is even though Ren could feel the delicious fear oozing out of him.

"We shall destroy the government that supports the Resistance. The Republic. Without their friends to protect them the Resistance will be vulnerable and we'll stop them before they reach Skywalker."

Snoke's expression changed, seeming pleased with the General as he sat back down on his throne.

"Go. oversee the necessary preparations."

"Yes, Supreme leader." bowing stiffly, Hux turned and exited the chamber, he took long strides, walking briskly, clearly pleased with himself.

Snoke and Ren silently watched the General go.

"There has been an awakening in the force. Have you felt it?"

Ren turned and nodded. "Yes."

Snoke leaned forward.

"It has come to my attention that the droid we seek is aboard the Millenium Falcon, in the hands of the betrayer Kylo Ren and his father."

The knight's body visibly tensed, but he did not show any emotion as he kept his posture and kept looking up at the Supreme Leader. The only thing that gave away his displeasure of hearing that name was his robotic hand which was balled up into a fist.

"Shall I gather my Knights and go after him, my lord? The boys are restless for a new mission."

The large figure that was Snoke shook his head.

"I still have use of Kylo Ren."

That had not been what Ren had wanted to hear as the muscles on his neck stood out, and his body tensed further.

"But my lord, that boy has no interest in joining us, killing hi-"

"Ren, my most esteemed knight," Snoke spoke up softly, yet dangerously. "You have stood by my side since the beginning, your loyalty unwavering. I have given you the order to bring Kylo Ren to me, not to question my orders!"

Ren lowered his head slightly, either from fear or abashment. Still, his robotic hand remained balled up into a tight fist. He didnèt dare respond.

Snoke tilted his head and looked down at the knight.

"I will worry about the boy. His lineage is full darkness, he will always be a tool of the dark. He will join, I have foreseen it, but this time I won't be as patient as before." Snoke hissed, clearly still angry about Kylo's betrayal.

Ren nodded and bowed. He was determined to bring the traitor to his master, even if it's in chains.

"I am a tool of the dark my lord, my will not my own. I will do as you order, and I won't fail."

Snoke nodded, pleased, but Ren knew that wasn't the end of it. There was more, something Snoke hadn't said yet.

"There is one other thing," Snoke leaned forward, looking at him as if he was looking straight through his helmet. "There is a girl amongst them, she fits the description of the one we seek. If I am correct... bring her to me."

That was his dismissal, and he didn't question it nor ask further. Turning, wholly preoccupied now, Ren followed the way the General left and exited the vast chamber. Power of authority, and the thrill of the hunt shown in his very posture and step. A monstrous smile twisted across Ren's face, hiding behind his silver helmet. He will enjoy bringing Ben Solo to his knees and make him suffer for the humiliation he cost him years ago.

_~K~_

Despite their escape, all was not peaceful aboard the Millennium Falcon. Whoever had the ship before didn't maintain it well and so the freighter was encountering problems after another.

The machinery wasn't working well, the ship wobbled mid-flight, and pipes threatened to burst from the pressure the malfunctioning was costing them. The sound they made was frighteningly loud. As for the crew they were just as much of a mess. Han and Rey spoke loud enough that their voices could be heard in the lounge, and Finn was practically being choked by the Wookie who was growling at him. The alarm, however, was the only thing working, and the only person on the entire ship who seemed unaffected by it all was Kylo.

He was sitting on the booth, his shoulders hunched over the table, his forearms resting on the surface as he looked ahead of him. His eyes were glazed, almost as if he were looking through the metal panelling and into the furthest reaches of space. He could vaguely hear anything, he barely even heard Finn cursing and Chewbacca roaring from pain every time the so-called rebel tried to patch the Wookiee up. Yes, he long knew that Finn isn't a rebel, he's met rebels before and has worked with a few to smuggle cargo into their bases, his best friend was a rebel, so he knew that Finn isn't who he says he is. Not to mention that he had begged BB-8 to reveal the location of their base. So no, he is no a rebel but it doesn't matter to him either. He's always been a good judge of character. He can see it in his eyes that he wasn't responsible for Poe's death, and that he's just someone who was at the wrong place at the wrong time, at least that's what he seems like to him.

However, none of that mattered, even his previous anger and the meeting with Han Solo didn't matter, not after that voice whispered in his head. It has been nine years since he last heard that voice since he last had him inside his head. Ever since he could remember he's been whispering in his head, whispering treacherous thoughts of hate and anger at him. Reassuring him that he's there for him, that he understands him unlike anyone else. For a boy who hated everything, and no one understood, that voice had been a breath of fresh air, of hope. He had a friend that understood him, that knew what he was capable of, more than just the name Solo, nephew of Luke Skywalker. He of course, now knew those were just lies, lies told to a weak, naive boy. Snoke never believed in him, he never stood by his side like the friend he had imagined. He just wanted to use him, and once he had no use for him he would dispose of him just like everyone else. That realization made him feel worse, rather than make him feel better that he found the truth. Even the most wretched didn't understand him. And so he had shut his connection to the force to prevent Snoke from ever whispering inside his ear ever again, and from ever finding him. After nine years he thought he would be out of his influence, that he couldn't reach him anymore and that he lost interest in him, it seems he was wrong.

The first time using the force, at least truly using it, and Snoke didn't waste time in slipping inside his mind. It was as if he had been patiently waiting for the moment to strike. He always feared that would happen, that Snoke would find him if he uses the force, and it seems that he was right to fear. What if he knows where he is? What if he's sending the knights after him this very moment? He could face them, but not the entire First Order, not without the force.

"I need help with this giant fuzzball!" Finn yelled towards the cockpit, startling Kylo out of his train of thought.

Chewbacca roared again in pain and a grimaced Han walked inside the lounge area.

Kylo looked around confused for a second, he hadn't even noticed the alarms had stopped blaring, and that they were now flying smoothly.

"You hurt Chewie," Han pointed star the Wookiee and then back at himself. "You deal with me."

Kylo wanted to roll his eyes. The relationship between the Wookiee and the smuggler seems to be stronger than ever. A treacherous memory came to him. He remembered when he was young, Han would bring Chewie over to their apartment to look after so he could go out with Leia. Chewbacca would stay up with him watching holovideos. Those days seemed to be eons ago.

"Hurt him!?" Finn continued to struggle with the Wookiee. "He almost killed me six times!"

Angry, Chewie grabbed Finn by the collar of his shirt and bared his teeth at him in anger. Finn paled.

Han walked up to the Wookie and knelt alongside him. Chewie let go of Finn, pushing him a few steps away. The large Wookie was still moaning from pain, but not nearly as much as before seeing as Finn had succeeded in patching up his wounds. Kylo watched in the corner of his eye as Han checked the bandage carefully, not even looking back at the dazed Finn. Chewie let him look over his wounds without making a fuzz, but Han was still careful in not applying too much pressure. Had it been anyone Chewiw would have ripped their arms off, and he knows it.

Chewie mumbled something Kylo couldn't pick up. He had long learned to speak Shyriiwook from Chewie himself, but he hasn't used the language in quite some time. Somethings had been forgotten along the way.

"Nah, you'll be fine," Han answered, tapping Chewie on the shoulder.

Han turned to face Finn who was now sitting on the lounge across from Kylo, trying to turn on the holochess alongside BB-8. The angry force user kept looking at the man with hostility, annoyed that he had sat near him. He thought he made it very clear through his body language that he doesn't want anyone around him, but Finn didn't seem to get the memo.

He and Finn looked at Han who seemed to hesitate for a second.

"Good job on Chewie… and thanks."

For a second Kylo's eye widened, shocked. In all his life he's only ever heard Han say that word maybe three times. He isn't one to thank others, not one to admit he needed help and therefore show weakness. He knows Han isn't really a cold person, but he doesn't show his emotions outwardly either. When he was young he never told him he loved him, never told him he's proud of him, never even told him he liked him. He would just ruffle his hair and smile down at him and then walk off. That was the kind of father Han Solo was.

"You're welcome," Finn answered and glanced back at the holochess. He slid a finger across the control, bringing the set to life. The pieces started to fight amongst each other and Finn fumbled with turning the device off. Kylo watched as Han smirked. He clearly found Finn amusing.

"Fugitives huh?" Han crossed his arms and turned his eyes on Kylo who was now looking at him. "Even you?"

He didn't answer, he simply sat there looking at the man. Was it childish to act so stubbornly, perhaps, but he didn't care. He didn't want to speak with Han Solo, didn't even want to share the same air as him.

"I'm surprised you got caught up all this. Last time I heard, you disappeared into thin air, leaving a burning temple behind."

Finn looked up from the holochess.

"A burning what?"

Neither Han nor Kylo answered as they kept looking at each other, not even showing any signs of having heard Finn. Kylo kept glaring at Han, still not saying a word.

"You got a lot of explaining to do."

BB-8 beeped urgently, and father and son turned to look at the droid. Rey stood beside the small droid, looking from one to the other, worry clear in her eyes as well as confusion. After seeing her Han seemed to realize where they were, and that there were other matters to be tended to. Their reunion maybe a long time coming, and he may have a lot of things to discuss with him, but he knew Han saw the urgency of their situation. He too, couldn't dwell on his anger towards Han Solo. Snoke now knows where he is, and it's possible that after breaching his mind he may still have a way to find him, so the faster they find a planet the faster he can go his own separate way and find somewhere to hide.

The smuggler gave Kylo a piercing look and pointed at him.

"I'm not done with you kid. After I figure this whole thing out you and I are going to have a very long talk."

Kylo glared at Han one last time but didn't say anything, his eyes following him as he walked up to the girl. He so hated that nickname.

"So what the story then?" He asked Rey and Finn.

Finn indicated to BB-8.

"It's the map he's storing. The First Order wants it and they'll kill anyone that gets in their way."

Han nodded, and Kylo's lips formed into a tight line. He had forgotten BB-8 is holding the map to Skywalker, that this whole mission is about finding his old master. If he was smart he would destroy the droid so no one can ever find Skywalker. He wants to remain hidden? Then let him rot away on his own. That, however, wasn't the only course of action. He could get the map and then go and kill Skywalker himself. He'd be doing the First Order a favour but he doesn't care. Skywalker deserved no less for what he did.

Han gestured at Rey with his head.

"How bout you?"

Rey pointed at Finn and BB-8.

"They're with the Resistance, and they saw me with them so I guess that means _I'm_ with the Resistance."

Kylo watched as Han nodded, but then eyed Finn. If there's one thing he remembered about Han, it's that nothing gets past him, it's what's kept him alive this long. So obviously he didn't believe Finn's a Resistance fighter. However, whether or not he really knew he didn't say anything about it, probably thinking that it's none of his business. He knows he left the Resistance long ago, they're none of Han's concern now.

Han looked down at BB-8

"Let's see what you got then."

Dutifully the droid rolled into a suitable position. A lense brightened, and abruptly the lounge was filled with an enormously detailed and complex star map. Nebulae, solo stars, translucent splashed of concentrated dark matter, and entire solar systems were displayed before them. Even Chewbacca sat up to have a better look. Finn was impressed and Rey was awed, but Han was frowning.

Moving towards and into the three-dimensional map, he looked from system to system. One finger traced the outlines of a, particularly bright nebula cluster. Like everything else on the map, it was brilliantly depicted.

Kylo however, knew it held only half of the map with the way a few sections seemed to be missing. He is no expert in the unknown regions, but he's dwelled in the borders between the known galaxy, and what laid beyond it. When he left the Knights and went on the run he considered flying into the unknown region and never coming back he even did it for a few months. It was difficult to navigate around that region, not knowing what was ahead of him and made lightspeed calculations near impossible so a lot of it had to be done through tiny jumps of lightspeed to avoid hitting anything by accident. It's easier to travel through lightspeed in the known universe because the ship has a clear and precise map, and knows where everything is which makes calculations incredibly easy. But when everything is uncharted, the ship and pilot have to work overtime to make the calculations which is why small jumps into lightspeed is the only thing he could achieve. Regardless, he delved into it for a time and did found a small habited planet named Hadrion, with a beautiful lush ecosystem. The inhabitants were humanoid, but they had no knowledge of the galaxy near their doorsteps. They had technology like their own, but it was behind considerably and he suspects they don't even have lightspeed capabilities. Still, from what he saw they are a happy people, ignorant of the war and things such as the force, and thankful for what little they have. They lived in small huts, and fish in the sea for food. He had wanted to stay, knowing he would never be found but he couldn't. He didn't understand why but he felt like he just couldn't leave the galaxy behind. Almost as if there was something missing.

Han turned to the others.

"This is accurate but it's not complete. It's just one piece. But I can tell from the location and from the breaks where this map leads to." He grunted softly. "Ever since Luke disappeared, people have been looking for him."

Kylo bet they were probably hoping that Luke can somehow save everyone as he did in the past. Things is, dreams and hope are always far from the truth. Luke won't save them, because he wasn't captured as most people think, nor did something happen to him. Luke left out of his own volition because he couldn't live with his guilt and mistakes. The great master of the Jedi order was brought so low that he could no longer show his face, and that's what he deserved if not more. Because of this he knows looking for him is a waste of time. Luke won't come back, and it will remain that way.

Kylo shook his head and looked at anything but Han, hating how he reminded him of Skywalker. The first thing his eyes landed on turned out to be the girl.

Rey looked at the map in amazement and awe clear in her wide eyes. He found it was a little endearing especially since she reminded him of a younger version of himself, one that was awed by the stories of the Jedi's fight against evil. Again, dreams are always far from the truth.

"Why'd he leave, anyway?" She asked.

Kylo turned to look at Han with intrigue, wanting to know what his reaction and answer will be. He must know he is somehow responsible. He had seen the holonews of what happened, or the Republic's version of it rather. He saw all the names of the recovered bodies found in the destroyed temple. Everyone that lived in the temple was accounted for, except for him and Luke. Due to that people speculated that they somehow got away and that they're hiding out somewhere, hoping to strike back at the First Order. Of course, no one has the real story. The only ones that do is him, and Luke, and he hasn't told anyone anything and he doubts Luke did either.

Han pursed his lips, his eyes going to his, his emotion unreadable.

"He was training a new generation of Jedi. No one really knows what happened, but one day the temple was found destroyed and in flames. Everyone that lived there was found dead, except for Luke and one apprentice. Luke felt responsible, he walked away from it all."

Han's eyes never left his as he spoke. For a second he was surprised that Han knew Luke ran away. He must know him really well to know that's exactly what Luke would do, and not what everyone else claims. They were really good friends after all, so it makes sense.

Finn's tone was soft. "Do you know what happened to them?"

Han finally looked away from him to look at Finn.

"There's been all types of rumours and stories. People that knew him best think he went on to look for the first Jedi temple."

For once Kylo was a little surprised. So Luke went to look for the first Jedi temple? He isn't at all surprised, he was always out looking for lost Jedi artifacts and temples, he even brought him along at times. If he went on exile, the first Jedi temple would be the place he'd go. He doubted anyone in the galaxy know where that is, even Snoke, making it the perfect hiding spot.

Rey was quiet through everything as she absorbed it all, but now she could no longer contain herself.

"The Jedi were real?"

His eyes jumped to her in a flash.

She looked so young and hopeful with her wide eyes. He was a little shocked that she would think them to be myths and legends, also ironic when he can feel the force flow through her. If she were trained she could become a powerful Jedi, too bad there's no more Jedi's left.

Han half-smiled, showing his age for the first time, shocking Kylo a little. He seems to like Rey, a rare thing to see from a man that rarely trusts anyone.

"I used to wonder myself. A bunch of mumbo-jumbo is what it sounds like. Some magical power holding good and evil, dark and light." He paused, turning his eyes to look at him in what seemed to be almost pain. "Crazy thing is, it's all real. The Jedi, the force, it's true. All of it."

The lounge fell silent for a long while, no one saying anything as he and Han kept looking at each other. He knew that what he was referring to was him. That when he was born and had to struggle with raising a force-sensitive child, is when he realized that the force is indeed real. He will always remember the day when Han finally realized that, because that was the day he sent him off to the academy, running away from his problems and things he didn't understand was his specialty. In the meanwhile, he was left behind to make sense of things on his own.

When the silence broke, it was by Finn who whispered softly, as if he didn't want to interrupt Han's and Kylo's silent confrontation.

"How about the apprentice? What happened to him?" Asked Finn.

Kylo was snapped out of his train of thought alongside Han who turned and looked at Finn. He knew the conversation would eventually lead to this part, and if not they would wonder how he managed to escape the rathtar. He wasn't too happy about them knowing since he knows that they'll have a thousand questions and won't stop bothering him about it, not to mention that he doesn't want people knowing. The fewer people know the easier it is to hide.

"The apprentice? He disappeared like Luke."

Kylo gritted his teeth at the mention that he's similar to Luke. Han turned his attention back on Kylo, his brows knitted together.

"But he's been recently found."

"Where?"

Rey asked almost enthusiastically as if this was some good news. Almost as if she was glad they now had a force user on the Resistance side, if only she knew. However, Finn was skeptical.

Finn's hand went to his chin, as he looked at Han as if deep in thought.

"Wait, you said earlier Kylo can take care of himself even against a rathtar. No one can protect themselves against a rathtar, not without an army."

Kylo cursed inwardly at himself, knowing that Finn has put two and two together. This is why it's never a good idea to bring attention to oneself.

The so-called rebel turned to look at him unsure.

"You're the apprentice aren't you?"

The air around the lounge became almost stifling in a matter of seconds. No one said a word as Kylo looked at them all. Finn was looking at him like he was some dangerous beast that could lash out on them, while Rey looked at him wide-eyed as if looking at him in a different light. She could clearly not believe that there was a Jedi in front of her, something she probably thought only existed in legends. But he is no legend, just a broken man with a lightsaber he refuses to use. Not to mention, that he hated being referred to as an apprentice. Reminding him of both Snoke and Luke, two masters that had betrayed him.

"I'm no one's apprentice."

He hissed and left the lounge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, this update has taken some time. I’ve started my last year of college and I’m busy with internship and work, and school so it’s really hard to find the time to sit down and write. But anyway it’s here, and I’m starting the next chapter already. 
> 
> In regards to the story. Very time I say Ren I mean the master of the Knights of Ren as seen int he rise of Kylo Ren comic. I know some people don’t read comics, so I just want to let everyone that doesn’t know who he is, he’s the master of the Knights of Ren before Kylo took up the title. 
> 
> Another thing, the story is near the point of diverging from canon which is really exciting. 
> 
> Also, I really disliked how Palpatine was a last-minute addition to the story. He was obviously not planned in TFA and TLJ, and that just bugs me so much. So this being said I will have to change canon a bit here, and make some reference to him every now and again. 
> 
> Anyways, hope you liked this chapter, please comment, and see you guys soon hopefully.


	9. Chapter 9

Kylo sat on the copilot's seat, looking out into the vast darkness of space. He had been sitting there for a little over five minutes, brooding. After he had left the lounge in anger he had made his way straight to the cockpit, the only place he could think of to have some privacy. The ship is equipped with rooms, but he couldn't go to them. There's too much memory held by those rooms. Of him staying in one of them whenever Solo brought him along on expeditions. A part of him tells him the room hasn't seen much change since he last left, and he rather not face a part of his past more than he already has.

Kylo huffs his displeasure at the whole situation. He looked at the coordinates Han had set the ship on to, and huffed once more.

Takodana that was their destination, the long way around it would seem. He's been to the planet before as a child, and later as a smuggler, so he knows it isn't too far away, yet Solo made it so they would arrive in no less than a day. He obviously did that on purpose to keep him trapped here longer and give them time to talk. Kylo, however, has no desire to talk to the man but he also had no desire to go to Maz's castle either. He went there once when he was but a child alongside Han and Chewie. The ancient woman had been enthused to see him then, and he's younger self was honestly freaked out at the entire place, and people in it that he couldn't remember much about it except how scary everything was. Still, if he were to go now there's no doubt in his mind that Maz will know who he is. There will one more person who knows who he is and that he's alive as if there weren't enough already. At this rate, Snoke and his knights will find him in no time.

_~H~_

Han showed the self-proclaimed rebel, he forgot his name to, and the girl to the two rooms inside the ship. He could tell they were exhausted from all the excitement and adrenaline rush that was now fading out of their system. He doesn't know them well enough to really care about their well being, or so he always said to himself. Inside, Leia's always told him he's a big pushover. A part inside him did feel bad but mostly for the girl who got dragged into this whole mess. Other than that, however, putting both stowaways in their own room means that they're out of his way for the remainder of their journey, giving him enough time to speak with Ben.

The girl was a little more difficult, refusing to leave without any answers. She was clearly exhausted, but that didn't matter to her. Eventually, he managed to get her to leave him alone and get her inside her room.

Han sighed at the knowledge of the upcoming confrontation.

It's been twenty-one years since he left Ben in the academy. Twenty-one years since he last saw his son. The first reaction upon seeing him had been shocked at how much he's grown. Of course, he expected him to have grown, last time he saw him he was eight. He didn't expect him to stay small forever. Kid's always been tall for his age anyways, in fact, most people used to mistake him for a kid four times his age, but to see how tall he is now was shocking. He himself isn't a short man, but his son is definitely taller than he is, and his body much bulkier. It was a little intimidating. In regards to appearances, he grew up to resemble him, but not to the point that he's his spitting image either. He is his own person in that regard, which is good seeing as some people hate being similar to their parents when it comes to appearance, and Ben would hate it more than anyone. However, he didn't get so lucky with his eyes. The kid's eyes are the spitting image of his mother, containing the same fire in them as hers.

Han smiled as an old memory entered his thoughts.

He remembered when Ben was a kid and he would come running to the entrance of their apartment to greet him home after a long journey. His eyes would be wide with excitement like a little ball of energy. Seeing those eyes would always make it harder to leave the house, but every time he made up his mind to leave he did manage to do it regardless. He's a smuggler, always has. It's in is blood, he couldn't just stay put and let Leia do all the work. Her purpose has always been with the Republic, something he learned the hard way, and he's has always been smuggling. Ben just got caught in the middle of all that, and then there came Taris and things became even more complicated.

Han walked inside the lounge area and looked at the booth. Chewie was sitting by the table, his head leaned back on the wall with his mouth hung open as he slept. After the whole fight with the Kanjiklub gang, and then with the self-proclaimed rebel that patched him up he was clearly left exhausted. For a Wookiee Chewie is still somewhat young, but he's still older than he used to be when they were facing off against the empire, not to mention the year of peace that made them all lazy. The big guy just doesn't have the same energy he used to have back then.

Han walked through the lounge, his footsteps as soft as possible, not wanting to disturb Chewie's sleep.

It still felt weird being back in the Falcon. It's old walls, wires and upgrades he put into it reminding him of the old days, of those days when it was just him, Luke, Chewie, and Leia against the empire.

He smiled in fondness at those memories.

Yes, those were the days. The days when decisions had to be made quickly, and without putting too much thought behind them because you never knew when you'll take your last breath. Nowadays everything's too slow, far too much for his comfort. Well depending on how things go with Ben he won't have to make any decisions in the foreseeable future, so he can only hope.

Han stepped inside the cockpit, his body appearing taller and bigger than it was in the small space. His eyes quickly landed on the copilot's seat. Occupying it was Ben, his back to him and his arms crossed above his chest. He was clearly deep in thought because he didn't make a sign of having heard him come in. Either that or he was doing one of those Jedi meditation things, that is if he's still a Jedi. According to Luke Ben had passed the exam to become a Jedi, but whether or not he remains one is still to be seen. Truthfully, he thought Ben had gone to that asshole Snoke, his path always seemed to be leading down the dark side. He and Leia always felt hopeless watching him make the wrong decision after wrong decision. After what happened to the temple and the other Jedi, they thought Ben would join the First Order, but that doesn't seem to be what happened. He honestly doesn't know the full story of what happened at the temple, all he knows is that Ben and Luke disappeared and now here's his son, helping a pair of stowaways and a droid get back to the rebel base, it just doesn't make sense. Something's definitely up. However, despite all that, a big part of him is very happy seeing his son again after all these years.

"It's been some years since I've had the Falcon, but that seat might still have some leftover Wookiee fur on it," Han mused, leaning on the entrance of the cockpit and crossing his arms. "I don't think you wanna get any of it on you. It's hard to get fur off your clothes."

Ben visibly stiffened. Yea, he clearly hadn't heard him come in. for a second he thought Ben would pretend that he wasn't there, but then he watched the seat turn slowly and he took a deep breath.

Hazel eyes met brown ones. For what felt like a long moment they both simply looked at each other, unsure as to how to respond. He didn't know what to say, which was strange to him. He's never been one to freeze up, but what was he supposed to do?

It's not like he could just say, hey kid how's the last twenty-one years been treating you? Ben, on the other hand, his brows were knitted together in anger. He hadn't expected Ben to be happy in seeing him, he did, for a lack of a better word, abandoned him, but he hadn't expected this strong hate for him either. It made something in his chest squeeze upon seeing such anger targeted at him from his own son. There's been many people that have wanted him dead before, and hated him to the death, but those were different. This was his own son that hated him. When he had held Ben when he was born he had never expected this outcome, never expected the kid that loved him above all else to hate him so much. Many would say he's a bad father, and he supposed he deserves that and more. He deserves his son's hatred, but at the same time, he didn't have any other choice. Ironically, the only way he could come up with to save his son back then was to abandon him.

"Twenty-one years eh?" he asked, trying to break he ice.

Ben's expression sour further, and he knew he made the wrong calculation. As if he needs more reasons for him to hate him.

"Twenty-two," Ben corrected, his voice audibly angry.

Han raised a brow, trying to salvage the situation the only way he knew how. Feign indifference. That seems to always work.

"That long huh?"

That was probably the wrong thing to say too, given Ben's frown it definitely was. Now not only does he hate him, but he thinks he hasn't even thought about him ever since he left him. Yea, that was very smart.

Ben leaned back on his seat, adopting a more relaxed posture despite his tense shoulders.

"Yes, you dumped me in the academy and never looked back," he hissed.

Han's brows softened. Ben was clearly trying to sound as indifferent and uncaring as he possibly could, but even he could hear the pain in those words. After so many years he still carries the pain around. He honestly thought he wouldn't care at this point, that he would have moved on. Surrounded by the force and being around Luke, something as insignificant as he should have left his thoughts long ago.

"Kid-"

"I don't want you to misunderstand Solo," Ben interrupted, leaning forward on his seat. He looked at him with those icy cold eyes that went straight to his very soul. "Ben Solo hated you, despised the very mention of your name. Hated the father that claimed to love him but left him behind. I'm not the weak Ben Solo. I don't share the same hate he felt towards you."

Ben leaned forward further, his expression emotionless as if what he was saying didn't matter to him.

"To me, you're just the smuggler Han Solo."

Silence dominated the cockpit. Han didn't know what to say. He felt like he's just been punched in the stomach. He expected that reaction, but that still didn't make him feel better one bit. He long knew Ben didn't see him as a father, to hear it in words was another thing. Despite that, a part of him still felt like Ben deserves an answer, to know why he left him in the academy all those years. He didn't know what he was hoping for. That his son would hate him less if he knew? He doubted that.

"Ben... I know you-

Ben waved his hand dismissively, interrupting him halfway through.

"I don't want to hear it. Those years are behind us now. If there's one thing I've learned ever since you left me in the academy, it's to let the past die." Ben leaned back on his seat and looked at Han bored. "Once we land I'll go my separate way, you'll go yours. We'll never cross paths again, but for the meantime, I've decided to put our differences aside until then."

Han uncrossed his arms slowly, not sure as to how to respond. That's never happened to him before, and it made him feel uneasy. Ben just wanted to treat him like a stranger he was a hitching a ride from, and a part of him was saddened by that. However, another side of him knew he had every right to treat him that way, and that this is for the best. Ben's never needed a father before, he doesn't need one now. Still, that doesn't mean he's leaving things as they are. There are still questions he needs answers to. Answers that at the very least his mother deserves.

"If that is what you want, I'll stay out of your hair. It's the least you deserve," he sighed, looking a little defeated. "Still, I need answers."

Han wiped the sadness from his face, as he hardened his heart and he knit his brows together.

"What happened at the Jedi temple nine years ago Ben?"

He watched as Ben's emotionless, and uncaring bravado fell and his expression turned distant and almost pained. That reaction gave him a bad feeling. This wasn't good at all. He long-expected Ben had something to do with the destruction of the temple, but he always denied his suspicions. No father would ever want to believe that their son committed mass murder. He couldn't accept that the happy-go-lucky son of his that used to play around with a toy X-wing could possibly be responsible for murder.

"Ben, what happened?" he asked, slightly more frantic. He wanted Ben to tell him that he was just overthinking and that he hadn't done anything and simply ran away.

That seemed to have snapped Ben out of his faraway thoughts, and no doubt memories as he looked up at him and frowned in anger as if he had forgotten he was there and was now angry to find him standing before him.

"I owe no one an explanation."

Anger flared inside him.

"You do to the family of the people that died that day."

That seemed to cause Ben to backtrack as he looked at him a little shocked, and for that look of pain to return to his eyes. It made him feel a tiny bit better to know that if Ben did have a hand in killing all those people, then at the very least he feels somewhat guilty about it. Still, he hopes with all he's got that he's just overthinking and that he isn't responsible.

"Everyone died," Ben said softly, his eyes far away once more.

It pained him to see him that way, but in this state, he seems to be more pliable and more willing to talk so he keept asking questions.

"How? Who killed them?"

Ben didn't answer, he simply pulled his brows together and looked at the ground. Whatever happened, it clearly brought back terrible memories, he only hoped that Ben didn't have a hand in creating them.

"Was it you?" he whispered, almost as if he didn't want to ask and didn't want to know the answer.

Ben's pained expression deepened for less than a second, only for it to change to one of rage as his eyes looked up from the floor and meet his eyes. For a moment Han was taken aback by the furry in those eyes, and he felt the urge to just leave the cockpit but he stayed his ground.

"Would make sense wouldn't it? The most obvious answer. that the grandson of Darth Vader was the one to kill all those Jedi? That I became what you always knew I would become, a murderer." the temperature inside the room seemed to take a dip, and Han regretted his words. That was not what he had meant. "Well, it won't please you to learn that it wasn't me that killed all those Jedi. It was the Knights of Ren that killed everyone, destroyed everything and forced Luke to run away like the coward he is."

Han looked at his son confused, but also relieved. Upon looking at his expression he knew he wasn't lying, either that or he's a really good liar, either way, he believed him. If he didn't have a hand in the destruction of the temple then it makes sense as to why he didn't become Snoke's lackey. Still, there are too many things that don't make sense.

"But-"

"Snoke did try to recruit me, but it didn't work." he interrupted, the anger in his eyes getting hotter by the second. "I wanted to join him, I wanted to become the man you, Leia, and Luke always knew I would become but I didn't"

Once again Han felt like he just got punched in the stomach. Is that what Ben thought they thought about him? That he would become a murder? A sith like his grandfather? Did he make that impression? He did worry that would happen, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't. But he was more concerned about his well being, about his poor decisions, not that he feared him because he was some sort of monster.

He wanted to say that he never expected him to become a murder, but he didn't.

"Then how did you survive?"

Ben quirked a brow.

"I was more powerful in the force than anyone in the temple, including Skywalker," he sneered at the mention of Luke. There was definitely bad history between Luke and Ben, but he didn't ask or bring it up. Those questions aren't as important, nor as pressing at the moment.

"When I saw what was happening I fought my way out and ran away. I never looked back. I forgot about the force, the Jedi, the war, all of it. I became a smuggler, ironic I know, but it was the only job I knew how to do other than being a weapon for the Republic."

Han was a little shocked that at the mention that Ben became a smuggler. A father should be proud of their son if they choose to seek the same career as them, but not Han. he always expected much more for Ben. A better life, perhaps as a respectable Jedi master or something, but not a smuggler.

Ben sighed, and put his hands on his knees and stood up. Now that they were face to face, their height difference was obvious, and so he had to look up at him a little.

"I think I've answered enough of your questions, enough to satisfy your curiosity and the General's," he huffed almost tiredly, and Han finally realized how tired Ben looked. His eyes were red, and there were deep bags under them. He clearly hadn't slept in a long time. "I'll be on the opposite side of the ship."

With that, he sidestepped him and exited the cockpit, however before he disappeared he stopped and turned his head to look at him. "Don't come looking for me unless something's threatening to destroy the Falcon."

And with that, he was gone, and Han was left on his own to ponder on everything he's just heard.

_~K~_

Kylo walked down the halls of the Falcon, anger clear in his blazing eyes, and balled up fists. Furry was boiling inside him softly, but not dangerously so that he would destroy anything near him.

It had been hard to stay calm in that confrontation with Han, but he couldn't deny that he had taken a load off his chest he's been carrying these last twenty-two years. Back in the cockpit there was much he wanted to say to Han. Ben Solo would have wanted to rage and tell him how it had felt to be abandoned, but he isn't Ben Solo. It's taken him a while to realize it, but after joining the knights, for however brief, and after today he can clearly see it now. He isn't Ben Solo, and he hasn't been for many years. At the same time, however, he isn't Kylo Ren. The persona Kylo Ren would have killed Han Solo back there, and Ben Solo would have raged until he couldn't anymore, but the man he is now could do neither. He felt exhausted, not just in a physical level but mentally and it didn't help that he hadn't slept in two days. Adrenaline had kept him on his toes, but now that it was wearing off, and after that confrontation, he felt like he could fall asleep where he stood.

Kylo rubbed his eyes to keep the exhaustion at bay.

He really needs sleep, or he's going to lose it, or worse. If he's so weakened by exhaustion, it's possible that Snoke will be able to enter his mind, and he simply cannot allow that. He's come too far to simply lose to something as insignificant as exhaustion.

He had wanted to avoid it, knowing that it would bring back too many memories, but Ben found himself walking to his old room, not wanting to think about anything else. Once he stood in front of it, he clicked the button and the door slid open. However, what he found there was something he hadn't expected.

The room was dark, enough that the human eye could barely see a thing, the only source of light was the one bleeding into the room from the open door. It wasn't much, and he could barely see a thing, yet he didn't t need to see to know what was inside it. From what he could tell, the room was the same as he had left it years ago. A pang of nostalgia hit him as he noticed the holo-images of podracers zooming around in their images, and of the workbench by the end of the room with various metal pieces, and unfinished projects. From what he could see the room looked the same as he had left it, almost as if frozen in time.

He was a little shocked. He had fully expected Solo to throw everything out and use the room for storage. Why did he keep all this stuff?

As he tried to look for the answer, half expecting it to reveal itself in the room, his eyes landed on the bed and looked at it confused. On his bed there laid a ball on blankets, rising up and down slowly. As he looked at it, it took him a little while to realize that there was someone under those blankets.

Suspecting who it was, he narrowed his eyes. He wanted to sleep, now it seems that he'll have to find another place to rest. For a second he debated whether he should simply wake the Scavenger up and throw her out of his room, but he opted not to.

He sighed and made to close the door but he was stopped. He barely heard it, but she whispered something. For a second he wondered if he had woke her up, and she was addressing him, but as he took a step inside the room he saw that she was still sleeping.

Now able to see her, he took the time to look at her.

Sleeping she looked less feral, if he could call it that, than she did awake. Her expression was soft, her lips parted slightly, completely serene and happy. Once again, he knew he could just wake her up and order her to leave, she isn't his friend or anyone he cares about, nor does he care about her anger. However, seeing how tranquil and happy she looked he just couldn't do it. Her eyelids were closed softly, and her nose would twitch a little in an almost innocent, and adorable way.

As he looked down, his eyes narrowed as he noticed the position she was in and the story it revealed.

Her sleeping position was anything but tranquil, and happy. Her body was formed into a tight ball, with her nose almost touching her knees. It's a strange sleeping position, and not very comfortable by the look of it but she didn't make a move to change it nor did she seemed bothered by it, in fact, it seemed that she was long used to it. Something told him that if she were forced to sleep differently, she probably wouldn't fall asleep. Her body was clearly far too used to this uncomfortable position, and he didn't have to wonder why. He already knew why.

Body movement reveals much about a person, and sleeping positions are no different. He could tell she was scared of something, scared that something would come and hurt her when she's at her weakest, and it's likely that her fears are legitimate. For someone to sleep like this without moving a muscle, there must be a previous experience that caused this fear. It wasn't odd seeing as she's from Jakku, it's likely that she had to live with the reality that she's always in danger even when sleeping. As he looked at her, he realized that he, strangely enough, wanted to know more.

He furrowed his brows, trying to figure out the enigma of a girl that is the sand rat.

She's clearly a nobody, from a backwater planet, and yet she holds so much power inside her frail body. He knew she's strong in the force, the evidence was in her impossible piloting, as well as the force signature he could feel flowing through her. From what he could feel she's powerful, more than any other he had ever seen, apart from himself and Skywalker. But, strangely enough, he could feel another small force signature, so small it was barely noticeable. He wondered where it came from for a second but didn't dwell on it for long. His focus was on the girl sleeping so happily, yet alert, in front of him.

His mind too focused on the girl, he hadn't noticed that his hand had gone up, it's palm facing her head. When she stirred a little, he froze as he realized what he was about to do.

Looking into someone's head is forbidden, at least for the Jedi it is. Even when he had been a kid he's always been skilled with manipulating the force to access the mind, something that Luke always scolded him on. He had felt angry then, that his uncle and master was scared of a gift he had, and wouldn't let him use. Of course, when he had become Kylo Ren he had learned to use his gift to its full potential. He could enter a person's mind by force, something that is very painful for the victim, but very effective for him. Snoke had been enthusiastic about his gift, to say the least. According to him, mental abilities are one of the hardest skills to learn in the force, and yet he was a natural at it. That revelation only proved his suspicion that he's meant for the dark side, always has. After he left the knights he was against using the force altogether, but he didn't fear his natural gifts in mind tricks like his uncle. However, he still refused to use them without permission, unless the occasion calls for it, and this is not one of those times.

He lowered his hand slightly and was about to turn and leave, but then she whispered something in her sleep once more, this time sounding somewhat agitated. Like before, he hadn't understood what she said, but his curiosity peaked. He was on autopilot as he raised his hand, and took a step closer so that his hand was almost touching the back of her head.

Narrowing his gaze and his focus, he locked eyes with the back of her head. It's not like she's going to find out anyway.

It was instantaneous, almost as if flicking a switch and he was inside her head.

She was asleep, so the first thing he got from her was her dream. Dreams were often difficult to decipher, being full of incoherent thoughts, and images, and emotions that only make sense to the person having the dream, but he understood some of it. He saw flashes of a little girl, being held by her wrist as she screamed at the top of her lungs for a ship to come back. She could see from the same eyes of the girl as the ship left, tears streaming down her cheek and the overwhelming feel of fear, betrayal, anger, and sadness all mixed together. The emotion was so strong, even he was taken aback by it.

He didn't have time to dwell on it however, as the vision changed to the same girl, older now. He couldn't see her surroundings, but he could see her, it was obviously the scavenger. She was sleeping on a hard desert rock. She was balled up into a fetal position much like she was doing at this very moment. However, unlike now, this version of her was fully awake. Her face was scrunched up, her teeth gritted together, tears were sliding down her cheek. There was almost an uncontrollable anger mixed with sadness and bitterness showing through with just her expression. The emotions themselves were much more powerful. He could feel the overwhelming anger, bitterness, sadness, anger, and fear almost as if it were his own, and that made his breath catch. Never in his life had he felt that. Never had he felt the emotions of another, even when he looked in their heads had he felt what they were feeling, and though he didn't understand how this was happening, he knew it was dangerous and had to stop.

He instantly tried to tear himself out of her mind but, to his horror, he found he couldn't, and his eyes widened. Almost as if the force connecting both of their minds had a mind of its own, the vision blackened, and changed, as if it understood the turmoil inside him, and he froze.

_~R~_

She didn't understand what was happening around her. She knew she had been sleeping, and having her usual nightmare. Sometimes it's hard to tell when one's sleeping until it becomes obvious, which is what makes dreams so terrifying and exciting at the same time. However, when she had attempted to wake up as always, she found she couldn't, she was stuck. She instantly felt fear flood inside her.

She'd experienced something similar before but this was different. It felt odd, almost as if there was something pushing against her consciousness, something that was tearing into her mind, and she couldn't wake up. She felt emotions that weren't her own, thoughts that were definetly not hers, and she could do nothing about it, except watch as things unfold.

She watched, afraid, and confused as the vision of her dream changed. Instead of her on the desert floor, crying herself to sleep, and old forgotten memory of her, she saw a little raven-haired boy in the corner weeping.

His little hands rubbed at his eyes to wipe the tears away, but to no avail. She couldn't help but instantly feel concerned and sorry for the boy. She tried to run to him but couldn't, and that's when she realized she didn't really have a body to speak of, she was just a disembodied being, watching things unfold. She once again felt emotions that weren't hers. Anger, sadness, pain and many others, but underneath all that she could feel indignation, and shame which was odd. It didn't feel like it was the boy who was feeling those emotions, but as if they were coming from somewhere else but she couldn't quite place.

She watched, utterly confused, unable to do absolutely anything as the boy cried. She couldn't see the boy's surroundings, as he was shrouded in darkness, but she could hear voices that weren't his, coming from somewhere else.

The voice was female, that much she knew, but she didn't know who it belonged to.

" _We have to be patient, Luke sai-"_

" _Luke isn't here,"_ a voice that sounded oddly familiar, yet she couldn't place interrupted. There was a moment of pause. "Can't you see he's only getting worse?"

The voice was soft, almost a whisper, but the boy had heard it as his silent weeping intensified.

" _We've done all we can, but it's not enough. He needs someone that can teach him how to control his powers, and that's not us."_

The little boy tensed and looked up, finally revealing his face. His hair was shoulder-length, and his face was round, full of baby fat. His eyes were red from crying, and his nose and cheeks had a puff of redness to them too. He was adorable, but it saddened her to see a child in so much pain.

"Then what do you suggest we do?" yelled the angry female voice

A few moments pass before the man replied, but when he does his voice was cold. _"I told you, we have to send him away. It's the only way."_

Rey watched as the boy took a sharp breath, and his eyes widened.

_"That's your answer to everything, isn't it? Avoiding the problem._ " the woman asked bitterly. " _By now I shouldn't be surprised. You always did run away from things!"_

_"And you've always been blind when it comes to him!_ " the man barked sharply. Rey watched as the boy winced, and tears fell down his cheeks. _"I love him just as much as you, but can't you see what's happening to him? The kid's got too much Skywalker in him. If we keep him with us we're only hurting him more. The only person that can help him is Luke._ " the man's voice became progressively softer as he spoke, losing its anger, and replaced with resentment, and sadness instead. _"I may just be a smuggler, and I may not have the force, but even I can see that there is a darkness growing in him. When will you start to see it? If we do nothing about it, what will become of him?"_

Neither of them say a thing, both voices seeming too upset to say anything ells. The boy however began to cry once more. Rey felt the need to help him again, but before she noticed, everything turned black again.

She was surrounded by a pit of darkness, confused, wondering how long she will remain like that until something comes out of the darkness until it finally changes.

It isn't a vision like before, not a solid one at least.

Voices are what come out of the darkness, none of them making sense and too noisy to make out anything. She grimanced at how loud they were, all of them scattered around the black space. She couldn't understand what they were saying, but from what she could gather, they were remnants of things lost past.

It felt like hours had gone by when finally, most of the voices disappeared, allowing two voices to rise above them.

She listened intently, half expecting not to hear what the voices were saying, but this time they were clear to her ears.

_"I don't want to stay here dad, I want to come with you."_

Rey didn't recognize the voice but it clearly male, and belonged to a kid. The pain and desperation in it were audible.

_"Ben we've talked about this,_ " the voice from the man in the other vision said. " _Your place is here son. Besides, it won't be so bad. You'll learn to use the force like your uncle, and you'll be a Jedi in no time at all._ " said the voice reassuringly, and playfully but also, with a hint of hesitance and sadness.

When the boy doesn't say anything, the man cleared his throat and continued.

" _You'll be alright kiddo, I'll visit you one day so don't worry about me alright? We'll see each other again."_

Rey waited for the voices to say more, but they never came. She was alone in the darkness again, the only thing that was with her was the immeasurable anger that didn't belong to her.

This time she wasn't given any time to adjust or to make sense of things as the darkness left her, and she was back in another vision.

The first thing she noticed was that this vision was different from all the others. This one was more solid, being able to see everything around her as if it were a holo-video, but more realistic. Despite the clarity, she was confused at first as was seeing.

There was pitch black smoke all around her. Everything she could see was on fire. She didn't know where she was, never having seen such a place, not to mention that the smoke made everything hard to see. She tried to move her head to see more, but she couldn't and that's when she realized that she had a body this time, but to her confusion and horror, it wasn't her own body. It was a strange sensation, one that made her feel weird, as she was looking through someone else's eyes.

Just what was going on?

She didn't have very long to think about it as something ahead of her exploded. The body she was in did not flinch as debris flew everywhere, it's, and now her eyes she supposed, were trained on what was ahead.

Something as burning in front of her. She couldn't quite make out the structure under all the black smoke, but from what she could see, it looked like some sort of temple.

Rey concentrated as she tried to make out what she was seeing. Once the eyes focused, and she could see she instantly regretted it. Indeed it was a temple that was burning but coming out of it wasn't just flames, but people who were screaming in horror and pain as they tried to escape, only for the fire to engulf them, and silence them forever. Those that managed to get out were covered in flames, their bodies running desperately, trying to put out the flames but to no avail. And those that did manage to exit, were met with hooded men that killed them on the spot.

As she looked at the horrific sight before her, she wondered what kind of hell she'd gotten herself into. In her life, she's seen terrible things. She had seen her share of people starve to death, even children, while she was unable to do a thing, but this? This was beyond anything she'd ever seen.

Feeling herself become sick by what she was seeing, she attempted to close her eyes but found she couldn't. She couldn't even avert her eyes form what was unfolding before her. She felt desperation escalate inside her as she was unable to do anything. She needed to get out of this place.

_"Ben!"_

She was instantly snapped out of her thoughts.

The body she was in finally turned slowly. As the body turned, she realized that it was holding a glowing blue weapon, something she had seen in stories before but was now very real.

It was a lightsaber.

As the body turned completely, and she could see who had called out the name, Ben, he quickly noticed their expression. The people that had called the name out froze, and looked at the owner of the body in whats he could only explain as shock, betrayal, and fear. The body she was in took a step towards them, his lightsaber in his hand raised.

Rey watched in fear, not wanting to see what would happen next. She tried to close her eyes, but it was futile, she was trapped. desperate, she tried to wake herself, but the closer the body got to the other, the more she realized there was nothing she could do. She was going to witness the murder of these people.

**"Stop!"** a voice rumbled angrily in her head, and she instantly knew it didn't belong to the vision.

Rey's eyes snapped open, and she took in a large gulp of air. Her body lurched up, covered in sweat. She took in deep sharp breaths unable to breathe properly. Her eyes were fixed on what was ahead of her, that is until she turned them and came eye to eye with the intruder in her room.

Kylo.

Her eyes instantly narrowed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I see a huge fight coming up! And what an emotional rollercoaster this chapter has been!
> 
> Anyways, sorry for the delay on this chapter. I've been busy with school, and work :(
> 
> I hope I'm forgiven, but before I leave you guys, there are a few things I have to say about the story.
> 
> I know Han seems like an asshole is earlier chapters and a bit in this but there's more to it than just being a bad father. In the canon movies, we only see Rey's perspective on Han, so obviously that's completely biased since she didn't even know him. She painted this perfect picture of him, and we know that's not entirely true. We know Ben had parent issues, especially daddy issues from what he's said in the movies, and from what we know about him. There's obviously a lot of hate and scorn towards them, and it's probably justified. He wouldn't lie about his parents not being there for him, why would he? Han and Leia were definitely not good parents, but maybe not at the level that Ben remembers them either. However, since this story is mostly from his point of view then you also get his biased view of Han Solo. So the more I go along in this story the more you'll learn as to who is right on their views of Han. Rey or Ben. Naturally, there is always a gray area.
> 
> Lastly, as the story goes on, I have found myself wondering about pairings. This story will be a Rey and Ben story, that won't change, but the other characters, I'm still on the fence. I initially wanted Finn to end up with Rose, and Poe with Zorii like in the canon. But I don't know if you guys want that. So I'm letting you guys decide. Who should Poe end up with? Finn, or Zorii Bliss?
> 
> Anyways, thank you for your support, hope you liked this chapter, please comment and see you guys next time!


	10. Chapter 10

_~F~_

Finn woke up with a start upon hearing the commotion going on outside his room. He looked at the door, a little confused at first as to where he was. For a brief second, he expected to see the black slide door of one of the star destroyers, but instead, there was an old, somewhat rusty door before him.

He blinked once, then twice, and stretched his neck from side to side.

He's on the Millennium Falcon, the legendary ship of Han Solo, he? who was a stormtrooper a few hours ago? Funny how things have lead from one thing to another in a matter of hours. After that whole fiasco with the rathtar, Solo had brought him to this room, saying that he needs his sleep. He honestly didn't think he needed to sleep, he's survived all this long on very little sleep due to the First Order's harsh regiment. However, as soon as his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light. He's never fallen asleep so fast in his life, usually, it takes some time to fall asleep, which isn't all that weird sleeping on metal like mattress aboard a star destroyer. In fact, he's never slept on a mattress as comfortable as this one. It made him want to sleep forever and never wake up.

"How dare you invade my privacy?!"

His eyes widened upon hearing those words. He instantly recognized the voice to be Rey's.

Finn jumped to his feet, all traces of sleep forgotten as he headed towards the door.

He pushed the button that slid the door open, and the lights outside the corridor hit him. He blinked a couple of times, but once he adjusted to the lights he was met with all the commotion.

Rey and Kylo were standing in the middle of the corridor, just outside his door. Finn's eyes looked up and saw Rey's staff right above Kylo's head, all of her weight behind the handle as she tried to push it downward. Meanwhile, Kylo was holding on the staff with just one hand, his teeth grit together as he glowered at Rey.

Finn could make out a large red swell on Kylo's arm, no doubt from a hit Rey hand landed on him. At that, Finn was surprised. Rey managed to land a hit on a Jedi, last he heard that was no easy feat. Either Rey's more skilled than he gave her credit for, or Kylo was just distracted. Wait. Rey did say he invaded her privacy, could it be the Jedi had gone to her room for-

No that couldn't be right. Kylo didn't strike him as that kind of man. There must be more to the story.

Finn's eyes moved from one to the other, noticing that they haven't even noticed him. Both of them were too busy staring daggers at each other.

"What's going on here?" he asked unsure, not wanting to startle either of them.

He wanted to say that out of both of them he rather not be on the wrong end of Kylo's wrath. He's a Jedi after all, but something told him Rey's no pushover either. She managed to take down a couple of thugs, including himself, with one swift swoop of her staff. Yea, he rather not be on either of their's bad side, he already has the First order after him he doesn't need anymore. And besides, she's pretty too, not that changes anything.

Upon finally hearing him, both Kylo and Rey seemed to finally acknowledge his existence by glancing at him for one brief second, only to turn their eyes back on each other almost as if not trusting the other to attack.

"He looked inside my head with his Jedi mind tricks!" she spat, her grip on her staff tightening.

Finn's brows lifted as he turned his attention from Rey to Kylo.

Read her mind? Sure he's a Jedi, but is that a thing that can be done? His knowledge of Jedis and the force is very limited. It's not like the First Order is going to educate them about it, not when their enemies have used the force against them. The Order only told him what they deemed necessary knowledge for a trooper. If you encounter someone who can wield it, kill it immediately. Of course, there are exceptions. He's heard of the Knights of Ren, who hasn't? Every trooper in the Order knows about them. How they're a group of bloodthirsty, force wilding mercenaries working strictly under the Supreme Leader. He's never seen one before, and he's thankful for that, and honestly would rather keep it that way. But if it's true that a force user can read people's minds then does that mean that Kylo knows his secret?

Kylo's nose flared in anger, his jaw clenching.

"I'm not a Jedi."

"I don't care. How dare you go inside my head?"

"You did the same!"

Finn looked from one to the other, unable to get the image of two children arguing. It was a little funny now that he really saw them. Kylo towering over her by at least one head, yet Rey was unfazed as she continued to try to force her staff down at his head. Kylo could probably disarm her with a wave of his hand, yet she didn't seem to care, and Kylo just glared at her in return.

"Ok, ok, how about we put the stick down hm Rey?" he suggested, gesturing to Rey to lower her staff.

Neither she nor Kylo turned to look at him. Rey made no move to lower her staff as she continued to glare at him. Finn started to consider that maybe he should change his approach, and do it fast before they start to kill each other.

"Look, I really don't know what happened, but I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation right Kylo?"

He turned to look at the raven-haired, but he didn't even acknowledge him, his eyes far more interested in the staff above his head and the girl that was threatening to hit with it. Upon looking at him, Finn could see the genuine anger behind his eyes. Whatever happened, Rey managed to piss Kylo off, and vice versa.

"If you don't take that staff away from my face I swear I'll-"

"You'll what? Use your Jedi mind tricks against me again?"

Kylo's glare intensified, his nose flaring. Finn too in a sharp breath. He knew he needed to diffuse the situation and fast.

Damn, he's never been good at this. Usually, if a fight broke out in the Order a trooper just needed to call an officer and they dealt with it. Said trooper was always sent to reconditioning which is why no one dared risk in something so meaningless. Maybe if Solo could deal with this, he strikes him as a grumpy old man that doesn't take shit from anyone, so he'd be perfect for this situation. However, the fact that they've been yelling and he hasn't come has to mean that he's either busy or doesn't care enough to come. which means that he's all alone in this.

"Seriously there are more important things to worry about than both of your damn tantrum," Finn's voice rose. "I don't know if either of you remember but we got the whole kriffing Order after us! Can't we just work together until we get BB-8 safely in the Resistance hands and then you two can kill each other?"

Once again neither of them seemed to hear him as they continued their standoff. He was actually a little shocked. He half expected them to turn their anger on him after calling their standoff a tantrum, but it seems that he was wrong.

At the corner of his eye, Finn noticed Rey tightening her grip on her staff and for a second he thought she was going to swing it at Kylo. Finn held his breath for the imminent fight, but nothing came. Instead, Rey let out a deep sigh and lowered her staff, but kept her eyes on Kylo. Likewise, Kylo seemed to relax now that he didn't have a staff above his head, and a very angry girl threatening to hit him.

"Ok, good." Finn sighed, relieved. He looked from one to the other. "Now, can anyone explain what the hell's going on?"

Rey's eyes narrowed and looked at Kylo sourly, almost as if she was seeing what had happened once more.

"He came to my room uninvited, and went inside my head."

Finn knew that much, she already told him this, what he doesn't know is why.

He turned his attention to Kylo who seemed like he rather be anywhere else but here.

"Ok, but why? Why did you look inside her head?"

Kylo shrugged.

"Curiosity I suppose."

On the other side, she could hear another fight brewing inside Rey.

"Argh!" she grumbled frustrated and annoyed.

Of course, he knew there was probably more to it than simple curiosity. However, something told him they're not likely to get an answer any time soon, if ever. He strikes him as the type of guy that would rather die than tell the truth, or admit he was wrong.

"Wait, but you said Rey did the same? and I'm guessing this is some force trick thing right? So how?"

Beside him, Rey finally seemed to calm down a little as she crossed her arms, and tilted her chin up genuinely intrigued to know the answer.

Kylo seemed to become more annoyed by their questions.

"I bridged our minds," he answered simply as if it was obvious.

Kylo opened his mouth to add more but then stopped briefly as he noticed the repulsion in Rey's eyes.

"It's only temporary, a simple trick Jedis used to use to get information. Nothing permanent," he clarified as Rey's disgust deepened.

Finn however, was a little intrigued and wanted to know more. All he's ever heard about the force are of the terrible things it could do. He always knew that it wasn't as bad as the Order claim, but to see that it can do more than he had expected, it was fascinating, to say the least.

"That still doesn't explain-"

Kylo interrupted Finn before he could finish what he was about to say.

"A bridge works both ways, but only one strong with the force can cross the connection. This is one of the reasons why it can't be used on other force sensitives."

Finn's eyes widened, more confused now than before. is Kylo really saying what he thinks he's saying?

"Wait but, Rey doesn't have the force… does she?"

Finn looked at Rey unsure as if looking at her for the first time. Has she always been a Jedi and she never said anything? No, it just doesn't seem like something she would hide. They could have used her Jedi powers a bunch of times back there, but she didn't do anything out of the extraordinary besides fly like the best pilot he's ever seen, and that's saying something. Kylo hadn't done anything overly strange before either and kept his abilities hidden, but he always knew there was something off with him. The way he killed those Stormtroopers so effortlessly, it wasn't natural.

Finn looked at Rey, noticing that she looked just as shocked and confused as him. If Rey is indeed force-sensitive, this is no doubt the first she's heard of it too.

"Have you not heard a word I just said?" Kylo asked sharply, clearly losing his patience. "Only someone force-sensitive can breach the connection, and I just said she did it."

"But how? How can Rey be force sensitive?"

Rey looked shocked, and at a loss for words. All anger forgotten.

"Some people are just born force sensitive, she just happens to be one of them, despite being a desert rat."

that seemed to get a rise out of Rey who glared at Kylo, who simply met her eyes unfazed as if daring her to do something. Before another argument could break out, Finn spoke up.

"But if that's true then why did you look inside her mind? if you knew she could look inside yours?"

Kylo looked away from Rey to look at him. For the first time, there was something else in his eyes. Could it be intrigue, and confusion?

"Because she was asleep, she shouldn't have been able to notice."

"And that gives you the right to invade my privacy!"

Kylo quirked a brow, unamused, and unfazed as ever.

"If you expect me to apologize, don't waste your time," he declared, crossing his arms. "I looked inside your mind, you looked inside mine. We're even now."

"You-"

"Ok! Let's all just relax, and you know get back to our rooms and put this whole issue behind us for now, before we start trying to kill each other again?"

Rey seemed like she wanted to argue some more, Kylo, however, seemed to agree with him for once.

"I'll be in the maintenance room," Kylo grumbled, walking away from them and exiting the corridor. Rey tensed as she watched him go, no doubt wanting to go after him to argue some more but stopping herself.

After Kylo was out of eyesight, Rey growled her frustration and anger, her hands balling up into fists.

"You still wanna follow him and smack him in the head I take it."

Rey turned her glare at him and Finn shrank down on himself slightly at seeing the full strength behind her eyes.

"How would you like it if someone went inside your head?"

Finn rubbed the back of his neck, unsure as to how to answer and make her feel better.

"It mustn't be very nice I can imagine," he answered, but Rey still didn't seem to be getting any better. "Look what Kylo did was wrong, no one has the right to enter someone's head. But we can't fight amongst each other, not when our lives are on the line."

Rey uncrossed her arms and let out a deep breath, her brows furrowed as she looked behind his head, her expression changing.

"It isn't just looking inside my head Finn there was more there. I saw something, I- I just…"

Finn straightened and leaned forward a little, once more intrigued.

"Yea?"

Rey shook her head and looked at him.

"I don't know what I saw, for all I know it could have just been a dream. It did feel like one after all."

Finn noticed Rey's distant look in her eyes and did the only thing he could think of. He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, worry clear in his eyes. Whatever Rey had seen, it clearly shook her, and if something scared her then it's probably bad.

"Rey, what did you see?"

Silence passed between them, all that could be heard was the rumble of the engine until she sighed and broke the silence.

"He killed innocent people before Finn, in cold blood."

_~K_

"What are we doing here again?" Asked Finn as the four of them made their up a large stone staircase.

Kylo looked up at the stonework, feeling nostalgic from when he used to visit this place as a kid. He had been around six when he last visited if his memory serves him well. Most people wouldn't even bring a child to such a place, but there's Han's parenting at its finest. All things aside he was actually a little nervous about meeting Maz again, not to mention her force sensitivity. It was small, enough that she couldn't possibly wield the force, but she could use it in other more subtle ways. There is always a possibility, however small, that she'll find something she shouldn't know from him. That blasted girl already knows something, now whether she understood what she saw or not is yet to be seen, but he rather not have anyone else know more about his past. The only reason he's walking to Maz castle is that he's got no other choice. He needs transport off-world, and hopefully somewhere far away.

His thoughts going to the girl to stop himself about the meeting with Maz. She was walking one step ahead of him, her grip on her staff tight, not trusting him while he's on her blindside. He looked at the back of her head and watched as her head leaned to one side as if she knew he was looking at her.

His eyes on her, he remembered how it felt being in her mind. If someone were to ask him to describe the feeling he would be at a loss for words. It felt almost as if he had lost himself inside her mind and couldn't really see a way out. Even when the dream she started to see his memories he couldn't break the bridge between their minds. Thankfully he managed to somehow break it just at the most crucial moment. He had been angry, furious even, that this girl has seen some of his most private memories, his weakest moments. Still, when he thought about hurting her he found he couldn't, not genuinely at least. He thought that maybe it's because she's just a kid and therefore couldn't hurt her, but something told him it wasn't but he couldn't understand why.

He thought there's something strange about this girl, but it seems that there's more of a mystery behind her than he had expected.

"To get your droid to the resistance. Do you think it was luck that Chewie and I found the Falcon? If we can find it on our scanners, the First Order's not far behind." Han indicated the soaring walls now rising before them. Coloured flags representing numerous cultures and tribes hung from the walls. "The galaxy's full of watering holes, but nothing like this place. Want to get BB-8 to the Resistance? Maz is your best bet."

He didn't doubt that. Through all his travels he's heard the name Maz come up more than once. Her reputation precedes her. If anyone can get the droid to the rebellion, it's Maz.

Kylo watched as Han reached for the blaster he had given Rey out of her hand, Han pointedly holstered it at the back of her belt, giving her a pointed look. "Not an establishment to walk into holding a gun. First impressions are important."

When they landed Han had given the girl the blaster. He had been off to the side, watching them. His father took the time to actually teach her a bit about shooting, knowing full well that she no doubt never even see a blaster in the first place. As he had looked at them he couldn't help but feel a little nostalgic. He had barely been able to hold a blaster when Han had taught him how to shoot. His mother had been angry when she learned what he was teaching him, but Han had stood by his decision.

' _It's a dangerous galaxy kid, and a man's gotta know how to protect himself,'_ that's what he had told him all those years ago.

Han spoke again, snapping him out of his memories.

"The most important thing here is to keep a low profile, stay under the radar. Maz is a bit of an acquired taste. So let me do the talking. And whatever you do, don't stare."

Rey and Finn replied almost simultaneously. "At what?"

The entrance to the castle slid open. A corridor led to an open hall of stonework where a large number of humans, humanoids, and distinctly nonhumans were engaged in a lifestyle Kylo is very familiar with. People were eating, drinking, gambling, scheming, negotiating, arguing, and occasionally attempting to kill each other.

Han turned to face them, and responded."Any of it."

Leading the way, Han alternately shoved, or side-stepped occupants of the hall out of their path, until at last he halted.

"HAAAAAAAN SOLO?"

All activity in the hall immediately ceased as everyone, regardless of what they had been doing, turned to look in the newcomers' direction.

"Maz…," Han said wearily.

Kylo closed his eyes in disbelief. Just a few seconds in this piss pit and the entire room knows of their whereabouts, wonderful.

"You still in business?" Han asked her sarcastically.

The small form that is Maz approached them. As expected Maz hasn't changed one bit all these years, time doesn't seem to affect her after all. She still wore the same goggles as before. When he was a kid he didn't know why, but those goggles always caught his eyes. They just took up most of her face, and he supposed when he was a kid he thought it was a little funny

"Barely!" she snapped back at the much taller Han, her eyes stuck on him, not really noticing the others. "Thanks to a certain-"

She suddenly stopped when her eyes drifted away from Han for a second, and landed on Kylo, shock clear in her eyes. He's met people far more threatening, but even he had to admit that the little figure that is Maz Kanata exudes authority.

Her lips pulled into a smile. "Well I'll be damned, Ben Solo. Last time I saw you, you were around my height."

Kylo raised his head in a curt greeting.

"Maz."

Her smile remained. "Heard your mother's been looking for you, as well as half the galaxy. As far as everyone is concerned you died all those years ago, and still, here you are," she said bluntly, and amusedly.

Kylo couldn't help but tense up a little at the mention of his mother, and of her looking for him. Of course, he knew she's been looking for him. After what happened at the temple and his abrupt disappearance, she's been trying to connect with him through the force, but he's blocked her ever since.

She didn't speak further on the matter, much to his relief, as her eyes went from his to Han, smile fading a little.

"We got a lot to talk about, especially about that money you still owe me."

Hand chuckled. "It's been a while Maz."

Maz goggled eyes looked around, as if looking for someone, only to land back on Han.

"Where's my boyfriend?"

"Chewie's repairing the Falcon," Han told her. Maz nodded.

"That's one sweet Wookiee. I'm so sorry," she abruptly said to Finn and Rey.

"For what?" Rey asked nervously.

"Whatever trouble they've dragged you into. If that boy's anything like his father, I bet he has something to do with you being here" Maz said, eyeing Kylo.

Silence passed for a brief while, Kylo looking down at her a little nervously. He only needs her until he can get someone to get him off this planet. Until then he'll have to play nice.

"Come! Sit! I can't wait to hear what you need from me this time," she said to Han, all implications forgotten.

The group headed off, trailing Maz out of the main hall. As they walked they drew only the occasional passing glance

Among those who watched them go was a woman, Bazine Netal. In contrast to her hulking companion, Bazine was thin. Unlike those whose eyes lingered but briefly on the new visitors, her eyes tracked Han and his companions until they were out of sight. As soon as they had disappeared, still following Maz Kanata, Netal slipped away from the crowd.

She slipped a communicator from her sleeve.

"Inform the First Order... I've found the droid."

_~R~_

Smoke rises from newly burned down piles of blackened rock, and ash. The Niima outpost, once full of life is now as empty and deserted as the environment it is located. Indeed nothing moved, or twitched, nothing except for the group of cloaked, helmeted man standing in the middle of the aftermath.

Ren, standing slightly off from the group, a clear indication that he's above them all, was cleaning the sweat off the back of his neck.

"You're sure everyone's dead?" He asked.

The most muscled of all the knights came forward, his sword resting on his shoulder. As with all the knights of Ren, he wore a mask similar to that of his fellow knights, but very different from their leader.

"We killed every last living thing and searched the entire area. There's no sign of the droid or the traitor."

Ren's answer was a simple nod, his helmet hiding his disappointment. He had hoped to find some clue that would lead him to Kylo and the droid before anyone else in the Order learns their whereabouts. The droid he couldn't care less about, it's just a pice Snoke wants for this war. Kylo however, his desertion is a personal matter of his. Snoke, and especially his Master wants the boy alive, well he can have what's left of him once he's finished with him. Will it mean his death by the hands of his master for disobeying his orders? Most likely, but it makes little difference. He doesn't like to admit it but he's getting old, in just a few years one of the other knights will try to kill him to usurp his position, that's just the way life goes for them. Personally he'd rather die knowing the traitor is dead right alongside him.

"Well then, guess we'll h-

Before Ren could finish what he was about to say, something buzzed inside his pocket. A little annoyed he reached for the object and took out a communicator.

He pressed the button, and a voice emanated from it. "Ren, we just received news the droid has been located on the planet Takodana. Supreme leader Snoke demands your presence there."

The voice, belonging to the ever loathsome general Hux went silent, not saying anything more on the matter as the communicator went dead. Ren looked down at the device angrily knowing that if it had been anyone else he would have gone off and killed him. Still, his anger was diminished by the news he's just heard. He knew it was only a matter of time before the Order finds the traitor, too bad he didn't find him first but oh well.

Turning on the spot, his cape swishing alongside him as he faced his knights.

"I got my orders, I'll find the droid and the traitor. As for you all, I want you to go to Star Killer base and wait for me there."

The other knights didn't say so much as a word, they were bowed, turned on the spot and headed to their ship. He, on the other hand, smiled under his helmet and headed off to one of the ships they hadn't destroyed. Kylo Ren is his unfinished business, even the other knights have nothing to do with this. He'll kill that asshole himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys sorry, this update has taken some time, but I've been super busy with college despite the quarantine and all. Online classes suck, but oh well.
> 
> So anyways the story is finally starting to move forward and soon we'll conclude the TFA and from there on out it's AU I suppose, but you know still technically canon complaint. Also, one more thing before I go. I did say that this story won't be the usual Reylo story where they fall in love in just one chapter. This is a slow burn guys, it will happen even though they sort of hate each other at this point, and their relationship won't be so sappy. Still, the whole force dyad is happening in this fic, just be patient. And as I said before, I am taking into account a lot of loose ends that the movies left off, and how things didn't connect with TROS, so things will be a little different in this story. This being said the emperor will have a presence earlier in the story. 
> 
> Anyways, as always really happy for everyone's continued support and comments. 
> 
> Hope you liked this chapter, please comment and see you guys next time.


	11. Chapter 11

~ _K_ ~

While Kylo and Finn ate what Maz had given them, they could not help but not stop themselves from marvelling at the amount of food Rey downed. It was as if she had never eaten real food in her life. Knowing her origins he wasn't as surprised, especially of her table manners, but still. She grabbed and consumed anything within reach without bothering to even look at it. Han also ate energetically, but he was careful with his manners. Kylo found himself envying the girl eat with such gusto, he has never been big on food.

"A map to Skywalker himself? You're right back in the mess." She briefly glanced at Kylo as she said this, referring to both father and son.

Han nor Kylo share the same enthusiasm as the small humanoid. Han as always cut to the chase. Seems something doesn't change.

"Maz, I need you to get this droid to Leia.

Silence fell in the group as Maz seemed to consider Han's request. As for him, he doesn't care about the droid, the resistance, any of it. He's just playing nice until he can find a way off this planet, unfortunately, the only way to do that is through Maz's help.

It was a little while later that Maz shook her head, and gave him her answer.

"Hmm. No. You've been running away from this fight for too long. Han, nyakee nago wadda. Go home!"

The words were meant for his father but he also found himself thinking about that word. Home. For many years he hasn't really had one, and his father is no doubt on the same boat. Neither really stopping to settle down for longer than a year, always on the run. The only difference, however, is that he's being chased across the galaxy, while his father is chasing something he doubts he even knows what it is. All his life he's been chasing it, leaving everything behind.

"Leia doesn't want to see me," Han said uneasily.

At the mention of his mother's name, he tensed a little. It's been a long time since he's heard her name, a long time. He's always kept an eye on her, not that he had to even try. The legendary Resistance General, Leia Organa, her name's always mentioned on the holo news. Much like Han, she's always dedicated her life to the Republic, to freedom as she calls it.

He looked down at his food distractedly for a second, feeling a pair of eyes on him. His eyes snapped up and met Maz's small beady eyes. It was brief but he could see the understanding and sadness? For him maybe? She didn't look at him long enough to know as Finn spoke, her eyes going to him.

"Please, we came here for your help."

Maz regarded Finn for a little while, only for Rey to finally put down her food and speak up.

"What fight?" She asked, far more intrigued on what Maz had said before.

Kylo watched as Maz's goggled eyes widened a little, no doubt wondering how Rey doesn't know about the war.

"The only fight, against the dark side. Through the ages, I've seen evil take many forms. The Sith. The Empire. Today, it is the First Order. Their shadow is spreading across the galaxy. We must face them. Fight them. All of us." She made sure to look at him once more.

Finn snorted, gaining everyone's attention again.

"There is no fight against the First Order! Not one we can win. Look around. There's no chance we haven't been recognized already. I bet you the First Order is on their way right-" He broke off as Maz adjusted her goggles, making her eyes grow even larger than usual. "What's this? What are you doing?" Finn asked indignantly.

Instead of answering right away, Maz's eyes somehow grew even larger within the goggles, impossibly huge. Then she climbed up onto the table and made her way to stand directly in front of Finn. Kylo looked amused as Finn looked at the tiny woman nervously. So much for the bravery he liked to fake. He couldn't really expect much from a liar anyways.

"Solo, what's she doing?" he asked.

Han shrugged. "No idea," he said, "but it ain't good."

Finally close enough to Finn, Maz finally spoke. "If you live long enough you see the same eyes in different people." She adjusted the goggles again, her eyes going back to normal only to show the disappointment behind them. "I'm looking at the eyes of a man who wants to run," she said solemnly, her eyes shifting to Kylo's briefly.

"You don't know a thing about me," Finn said in frustration. "Where I'm from. What I've seen. You don't know the First Order like I do. They'll slaughter us. We all need to run."

Maz considered him, and for once Kylo couldn't disagree with Finn. He knows what the First Order is capable of, what he was once capable of doing for them.

Finn's eyes followed Maz's finger as she pointed back at a booth.

"You see those two? They'll trade work for transportation to the Outer Rim. There, you can disappear."

That was Kylo's cue to finally leave this place.

Awkwardly, Finn rose from his seat, followed by Kylo. He noticed the look of confusion in Rey's eyes as she looked at them both, as well as the pain brief in his father's eyes.

"What-" Rey couldn't finish her question as Han interrupted her.

"Leaving already?"

Kylo merely raised a brow. He had told Han he is leaving as soon as he finds a way out of this planet, this isn't some big news. Still, he could hear the unease and hurt? Coming from his voice, almost as if he had hope he would stick around for longer.

"There's no reason for me to stay longer than I need to," he said bluntly.

Han looked hurt for a second, almost vulnerable. For a second he was actually shocked. Never in his life has he seen his father like this. He's always been strong, uncaring and unfazed, never showing any weakness.

"Kid…" he paused, his brows knitting together as if he was concentrating as to what to say. Kylo watched him with rapt attention, unsure as to what will come out of his father's mouth? An apology? Tell him how sorry he is that he left and never came back? He wasn't sure, and he'll never know as Han wiped the vulnerability from his face and gave him a cocky half-smile. "Be careful out there."

Kylo responded with a nod, not at all surprised. He didn't say or dwell on the matter as he turned on the spot. Beside him, Finn reached for his belt and drew the blaster Han had given him and offered it back to its owner.

Han didn't look at him. "Keep it."

Finn hesitated for a second but he didn't waste time saying anything further. Turning, he walked away with Kylo. Before they could leave, however, Maz spoke.

"I do not know your past young Ben Solo, what made you change so much. But I do know you're just like your father, running away from where you belong." Kylo's eyes furrowed, he stopped and looked back at the small woman.

"Sooner or later your past will catch up to you, and you will have to face it. Your destiny is not out there, it's here, now."

Kylo didn't answer, he merely balled his hands into fists, only to unclench them. What did she know about his destiny? Not saying a word, he turned on the spot and walked away.

"No matter how much you deny your past, you'll always be a Skywalker."

He nearly stopped as he heard that name, but thankfully he kept walking. His thoughts were churning, but he kept them under control as he approached the table Maz had pointed out. There were no humans in the group, save possibly the red-helmeted captain, but they eyed him with prejudice. Far used to the scrutinizing look from working as a smuggler, he met their eyes with confidence. He's going to get off this planet, leave everything behind again and start a new life. This time, however, he'll go somewhere nobody can find him. He always felt there was something keeping him around, pulling him from leaving and going to the unknown regions. He could never pinpoint where that feeling came from, but now he's more than happy to ignore it as he should have long ago.

Finn stood before the captain and was the one to speak for them.

"I'm told you're looking for help. We'll work for a lift to any civilized world on the Outer Rim." The captain didn't respond, instead, it was the first mate beside him that did. From Finn's expression, he didn't understand a word the man said, and neither did he.

"I don't know what that was," he responded, "but it's a deal." Finn smiled, naively, trusting too quickly. Kylo doesn't know the intentions of these men, so he's sure to keep an eye on them if they try anything.

The exchange was interrupted by Rey's arrival, accompanied by an anxious, softly beeping BB-8 who bumped against his leg, as if asking him why he's leaving.

Finn turned to look at Rey, then smiled anew at the leader of the alien crew. "Give me a second." Finn

walked Rey away from the table, leaving the aliens to mutter incomprehensibly among themselves.

Kylo didn't have any plans to follow them, that is until BB-8 kept pushing him towards them and he had no choice but to sigh and follow after them.

' _Just a few more hours and you're out of this nightmare,'_ he kept telling himself.

"I'm not who you think I am," Finn said as Kylo walked into the conversation.

She was shaking her head slowly, not comprehending what she was hearing. "Finn, what are you talking about?"

His voice tightened as he finally blurted out the truth. Even Kylo was a little intrigued, he's been wondering who Finn really is.

"I'm not a hero. I'm not Resistance. I'm a stormtrooper."

That silenced her, it was even enough to shock him. Kylo looked at Finn as if this is the first time he's seen him. A stormtrooper? Out of all the things he thought he was that was never one of them. Finn's just too gutless to be a stormtrooper, but still, it shocked him that maybe they're not so different. Not that he cares anyways. As soon as they reach their destination he'll be sure to go his own way and never see him again.

"Like all of them, I was taken from a family I'll never know. And raised to do one thing…" Finn hesitated, pain clear in his eyes. "But my first battle, I made a choice. I wasn't going to kill for them. So I ran. As it happens, right into you guys." Finn took a step closer to her. "Rey you looked at me like no one ever had. I was ashamed of what I was. But I'm done with the First Order. I'm never going back." He offered her his hand. "Rey, come with me."

She looked at him with disbelief and shook her head. "Don't go."

He knew she meant Finn, she couldn't care one bit that he's leaving, as she shouldn't. So he was a little shocked when she looked at him briefly as if to tell him that she was also asking him. Kylo was actually confused and unsure as to how to feel at that as his brows furrowed.

"Take care of yourself," Finn begged her. "Please." He turned and headed back to the group of waiting aliens.

Kylo remained behind for a second, regarding her for a little short while. Knowing this is the last time he'll see her, he wondered what will happen to her, what she'll do now that she knows she's force sensitive? Will she become the new poster girl of the resistance? His mother would sure like that, but for some reason, he hoped that wasn't the case. She may be annoying, sticking her nose in things that don't concern her but in the end, Rey's just a kid, a kid that would be used as a weapon by the resistance. He knows how that feels, the burden of being force sensitive. Most would find it a blessing until they realize they're just being used as a weapon. It doesn't matter if it's the light side or the dark side, they both end with killing. He suffered that fate, and now it felt wrong to just let her become that.

Kylo took a step towards her and looked at her straight in the eyes.

"Don't let anyone know you're force sensitive."

She looked at him confused. She clearly didn't understand the warning but he didn't stick around for her to figure it out as he turned and followed after Finn. With every step he took, he felt like something wasn't right, his feet dragging and weighing a ton.

_~R~_

Rey made her way down a distant corridor, BB-8 followed.

There was a stairway there, ancient stonework leading downward.

Her mind preoccupied itself with the strange feeling calling to her, a welcoming distraction from thinking about Finn and even Kylo. She's only known them for a couple of hours but she still felt the pain of losing them, of having people walk out of her life yet again. The feeling of loss is stronger with Finn, his kindness something she won't forget. With Kylo, well she isn't really sad about parting with him. He's selfish and arrogant, still, she can't help but remember what she had seen in his head and his last words to her. Don't tell anyone you're force sensitive? Why would he say that? She always thought having the force is a blessing, something to be happy about? It just doesn't make sense.

An echo of a girl crying snapped her out of her thoughts, her head back in the now.

She headed down the hall, to the very end. There she found a door. It almost seemed to vibrate. BB-8 chirped nervously, but she ignored the droid, drawn to the large door. She looked down, seeing a seal, a lock, on the door. She reached out, only to draw back her hand when it opened before she could make contact. She took a nervous gulp and walked in.

It was darker still in the room beyond. Among the stone arches she could see crates piled haphazardly and shelves filled with packages heavy with age and dust. Tarps and cloth-covered much of the collection. There seemed no reason to the place, no organization of any kind. Objects of obvious value sat side by side with simple woven baskets and bundles of unknown plants.

Though curious as to their functions and origins, she ignored them all, moving deeper into the room toward a table on which rested a single wooden box. There was nothing especially impressive about the container, nothing overtly valuable or significant. Yet of all the items in the chamber she was drawn only to it. The feeling was unexplainable, but she knew she needed to see inside. Behind her, not a peep of a beep came from an anxious BB-8.

She reached for the box finding, to her shock, that was not locked. She opened it.

A heavy, slow, mechanical breathing filled the room.

Startled and a little scared she turned on the spot, finding that she's no longer where she had been a few moments ago. Instead, she found herself looking down an impressive hallway, its architecture reminiscent of the Old Empire. Peering harder, farther, she saw in the distance a section of the famed Cloud City.

"Hello?" she called confused but received no answer. Instead, the world turned inside out, causing her to trip and fall. As she looks around she notices that the ceramic she had just seen, had now turned to dry grass.

A sound made her turn, and she blinked in surprise at the sight of a small blue-and-silver R2 unit. Everything was now dark, ash and sparks falling onto the ground. In this new place, a figure appeared, sitting. The figure was covered in a long cloak, the only thing visible was the robotic arm that reached for the droid.

She blinked and both were gone.

Day became night, sky ominous and filled with rain. She was standing, she was sitting, she was looking up—to see someone, a warrior, take the full force of the lightsaber. He screamed and fell. She realized then that she's on a battlefield. Scared, she rose and turned. As she turned, she found herself confronted by seven tall, cloaked figures, dark and foreboding, all armed. Soaked and shivering, she stumbled backward, turning as she half fell. The one in the middle, his chest bare and full of scars looked at her and took a step forward.

She held her breath, but as soon as they came the seven vanished.

Around her, the scene changed. A village in flames, dark smoke rising and covering the dark, night sky. Realizing that she must be losing her mind she climbed to her feet and took a deep breath. She instantly wished she hadn't. The smoke burned her throat, causing her to cough and her eyes to water. From in front of her, not far away, came the sounds of battle, the cries of the wounded and the clashing of weapons. Then behind her, another voice.

"Don't do this."

She whirled, glazed eyes desperately scanning the dark space before her, trying to look through the darkness. Eyes going from one spot to the other, she found where the voice had come from. Through the heavy smoke, there stood two figures. One, she had never seen before, clad in a long cloak, dark armour and helmet, a red lightsaber in hand. The other person, however, she instantly recognized. It was Finn, his clothes different from what he had seen him in and his face full of bruises and cuts.

Confused, and now terrified, she watched as Finn stood in front of a group of what appeared to be innocent villagers, trying to shield them from the ominous figure. Devoid of any mercy, the figure lifted up its hand and with it, Finn levitated briefly and was pushed to the side like a doll.

"Please don't," Finn begged tears in his eyes. The figure didn't so much as hesitate as it approached the terrified villagers, lightsaber raised.

She screamed, and screamed again, and fell backward, backward, sitting down hard in—

It took her a little while to realize she was once more in the underground corridor, sitting on the cold old stone, her chest pounding.

"There you are."

The voice made her jump. But as she turned, she found it was only Maz, standing alone in the doorway.

"Wh-what was that?" Rey stammered as she struggled to catch her breath.

Maz looked from her to the open doorway and then back to Rey, not at all angry that she was there. "It called to you."

Rey stood unsteadily, her mind still burned with the images of the villagers being sliced in half by a lightsaber, and of Finn begging the figure to stop.

BB-8 rolled out of the room to come to a stop beside her.

"I—I shouldn't have gone in there." Aware that she might well have violated unknown privacies, she hurried to apologize. "I'm sorry…"

"That lightsaber was Luke's. And his father's before him and now, it calls to you!"

Rey stood up fast. Overwhelmed, she felt the need to get away.

"I have to get back to Jakku."

"Han told me." Her voice was gentle now, not at all the hard, sardonic tone she had up until this moment. Maz gently grabbed her hand. "Dear child. I see your eyes. You already know the truth. Whomever you're waiting for on Jakku, they're never coming back. But... there's someone who needs your help."

Tears were beginning to trickle down Rey's face. She'd had enough of all of this. It was too much.

"Luke." She said unsure, but Maz didn't correct her either.

"The belonging you seek is not behind you. It is ahead. I am no Jedi, but I know the Force. It moves through and surrounds every living thing. Close your eyes. Feel it." Maz extended the lightsaber to her. "The light. It's always been there. It will guide you. The sabre. Take it."

Rey's voice strengthened as she wiped away tears. "I'm never touching that thing again. I don't want any part of this."

Without another word Rey took off running, heading determinedly toward the stairs. Accelerating, BB-8 easily kept pace. Maz watched her go and sighed.

One could teach knowledge. One could teach skills. One could even, she knew, teach something of the Force.

But patience had to be learned alone, and sometimes pain.

~K~

Finn and Kylo loaded the employer's freighter. Being taller and stronger than Finn Kylo carried two boxes at a time, while Finn settled for one. The men that hired them didn't breathe down their necks like the regular employer he was used to. They had simply grunted their instruction by pointing to a pile of boxes, and so without a word he and Finn went to work. The sooner he can get off this planet the better, especially when he kept getting a feeling that something's off.

Without warning, a sharp needle-like pain stabbed the side of his head. He's long used to pain, having suffered much hardship amongst the knights and as a Jedi, but this was unlike anything he's ever felt before. Being inside the corridor of the ship, Kylo leaned his body on the walls for support, his head down, eyes shut tightly from the pain. He vaguely heard a box fall to the floor, and footsteps coming his way.

"Whoa, are you ok?" Finn asked, standing beside him and putting a hand over his shoulder.

"I-I don't-"

The pain stopped him from continuing his sentence, instead, he gave out a groan and pressed the tips of his finger against his temple, trying to alleviate some of the pain. He didn't understand where the pain was coming from, much less the strange emotions that are clearly not his own. Fear, anger, sadness, he felt all that but he didn't understand from where. He thought maybe it's Snoke who's attacking his mind, but it felt nothing like his old master. No, it felt like...

He managed to open one eye and peered at a confused, and concerned Finn.

"Rey."

The ex-stormtrooper's confusion deepened, but then his eyes widened with concern.

"What about Rey?"

The pain subsiding out of nowhere and then disappearing just as fast as it came, Kylo straightened up. Finn took a step back and took his hand off his shoulder. Turning, Kylo looked at Finn, concern reflected on both their eyes.

"Something's happened to her."

He didn't clarify or explain himself as he sidestepped Finn and exited the ship. Behind him, he could hear Finn following closely behind, calling his name.

He didn't understand what he was doing, why he even cared about the sand rat, but at that moment he couldn't help but worry for her. He kept getting this irrational feeling that if he didn't make sure she's ok, he'll regret it. Besides, he just needed to find her, see with his own eyes that she's fine and he can go back to work and leave, it's that simple so why was his mind still so shaken? Why did his mind connect to hers?

~R~

Overwhelmed and exhausted both physically and mentally, Rey finally slowed to a halt. Running solved nothing. Besides, she had nowhere to run to, and she could not run from herself. A familiar electronic chirp made her turn.

BB-8 slowed as he approached, beeping inquisitively. She was far too tired to acknowledge the little droid's concern.

"No," she replied, gesturing. "You have to go back." More beeping and she could only shake her head tiredly.

Above her, lines of red light made their way across the dark vacuum of space. Too preoccupied with what she's just seen, she hadn't even noticed them.

~H~

The crowd of visitors who had filed out of the old castle had turned their eyes to the sky. Everyone watched the lights fly across the stars, all speaking in various languages, wondering what the lights were. When it became apparent that the lights are man-made, and in fact a blast from some unknown battle station everyone turned to fear and uncertainty.

Han and Chewbacca stood among the crowd, looking up at the red blasts. For Han, it was obvious that these strange red lights are blasts coming from a battle station. He's seen what a blast like that looks like, what fear it brought whoever looked at it. Before he could voice an opinion, his fears were confirmed by someone behind him.

"It was the Republic. The First Order—they've gone and done it." A concerned Finn looked past him, Ben standing beside him not looking at him either, but as if he was looking for something or someone. "Where's Rey?"

That immediately changed Han's focus.

"Thought she was with you."

The four of them looked at each other concerned.

A voice interrupted them. They turned to see Maz approaching.

"You three come with me. There's something you must see."

_~B~_

The subterranean corridor in the castle was one Ben had never visited. It was also a place to which he doubted she allowed anyone in, yet here she was leading them through it. He's heard stories that she hoards powerful, old artifacts, some of them from Jedi and even Sith origin. Despite the opportunity to analyze such a place, he couldn't help but get this strange buzz feeling. He couldn't explain it, but it was almost as if he had been here recently, and yet it wasn't really him. He guessed that's what a phantom limb would feel like, as if it was still there but not at the same time. What's going on?

A familiar door he had never seen before opened to admit them. Dark, treasure-filled, and in the distant dark, a box on a table.

"You will need this."

His eyes landing on it he felt something odd coming from the box.

Maz opened it, and from inside the box, she removed a lightsaber. Finn eyed it uncertainly, while Kylo's eyes widened, recognizing it instantly.

"Kept it locked away."

"Where'd you get that?" Han demanded, just as shocked as Kylo.

"A good question for another time."

Maz extended the lightsaber to them, and without thinking it Kylo reached for it. He knows the stories, he knows who this lightsaber belongs to, his uncle of course, but most importantly to his grandfather. His eyes were wide, looking at the sabre almost reverently as his fingers curled around the hilt, only for it to be ripped out of his reach.

"Ah, you already have your own lightsaber, one of your own making. Whether you use it or not is your concern," she scolded, looking at him and then at Finn with a knowing look. Surprising them all, she handed the weapon not to Han or Chewbacca, but to Finn.

Kylo straightened his back and looked down at her, angry and disappointed, reminiscent of a child. He has every right to argue, the lightsaber belonged to his grandfather, it belongs to him. Still, he wasn't shocked as to why Maz would offer the lightsaber to Finn. He was counting on Maz to figure out Finn's secrete, one he doubts even he knows. Ever since he looked inside Rey's head he's suspected that Finn's also force sensitive. Little force signature is what he kept feeling while aboard the Falcon. He thought it came from Rey, but her force signature is massive, akin to a sun, rivalling even his own. This force signature was almost difficult to feel, and it came and went, but at the same time, it was growing. He knows his father isn't force-sensitive, the universe would have a sense of humour if he is, and neither is Chewie which left Finn. Obviously, he's not very strong with it, but enough that he could have become a Jedi under the proper circumstances. Still, lucky that he didn't otherwise he would have burned alongside the other Jedi students in the temple.

"Take it! Find your friend!"

At the mention of Rey in danger, Kylo snapped out of his train of thought, concern overtaking his expression.

Finn stared at the lightsaber, almost as if he wasn't sure whether to keep it or give it back to Maz. Before he could make up his mind, something potent and loud slammed into the castle, causing dust and rock to fall from the ceiling.

"Those beasts," Maz said. "They're here."

~R~

Rising her head she saw the fleet of First Order ships thundered overhead, dropping toward the castle. The castle where her friends still were.

She didn't think twice about it. Racing through the trees and back toward the castle, Rey slowed for a little while. Wide-eyed, she could only hope that her friends had managed to flee the complex before the attack began. She watched as swooping TIE fighters were reducing the stone walls and towers to dust, while others targeted smuggler ships and traders who were frantically running for cover. Their panicked flight was futile, as they were quickly intercepted by squads of stormtroopers who had landed nearby.

Turning to run in the other direction, she caught herself just in time as a shuttle touched down nearby.

Without the slightest hesitation, the tall figure of Ren emerged, making its way towards the castle to join the battle. A stunned Rey could only track him with her eyes. She had seen this man before, in Kylo's mind and in that nightmare.

She didn't have time to keep looking at him. Beside her, a tree erupted in flame, splinters flying from it. Rey covered her face with her hand, thankfully nothing hit her. However, she did gain the attention of a squad of troopers.

Turning their helmeted heads, they spotted her and opened fire without so much as saying a word. Taking cover, she drew her blaster, aimed, and pulled the trigger. For a second she was confused when nothing happened, then she remembered she needed to slip off the safety.

"Safety!"

Once activated, and a little embarrassed she pointed her blaster at the approaching troopers. She had never fired a blaster in her life, but how hard could it be? Apparently not so hard as she managed to take down two of the troopers and give the rest reason to pause their pursuit.

She didn't have time to celebrate as she knew the troopers would soon re-gather themselves and continued to chase after her. Calling to BB-8, who was at her side in an instant, she started back into the woods and away from the scene of combat.

"You have to keep going, stay out of sight," she told the droid. "I'll fight 'em off." A loud beeping prompted her to answer. "I hope so, too."

_~R~_

Emerging from behind the rocks and trees where they had taken cover from the deadly precise fire that had hit two other troopers, they resumed the search but more cautiously than before. Spotting Ren moving through the debris, one trooper hurried to report.

"Sir, the droid was spotted heading west, with a girl."

At this Ren said nothing, but instead looked sharply in the indicated direction. Under his helmet, it was hard to keep the excitement from taking over his expression. The droid's wanted by Snoke, and he wants Kylo, but the girl...she's wanted by his master. For years he's been looking for her, and now here she is. He didn't need to check to make sure it's her, he knows, he can feel the familiar force signature coming from her. The excitement almost made it feel better that he's giving up his chance to kill the traitor to go after the girl. For if his master learns that he had the opportunity to capture her but didn't, he won't just kill him, he'll do much worse. Death is all nice and good, but torture? He would rather not go through that.

So forgetting Kylo, for now at least, he followed after the most important piece in this war.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright guys that was chapter 11, and after such a short time between chapters. Anyways things are starting to happen, and as you can see the story is already starting to separate from canon. Also, as you can see the force bond/dyad is already starting to take form and it'll be interesting to see it develop more in the story. ALSO, I hope you guys like my drawing of smuggler Ben. that's the way I picture him in this story, and I thought the rebel look fits him well. Also, yes his lightsaber is still red. 
> 
> Anyways that was all from me so thanks for reading, please comment and see you guys next time!


	12. Chapter 12

As the woods closed in around her, Rey jumped at every sound, she glanced sharply at every rustled branch and falling leaf. She was scared but held tightly to the blaster and prevented herself from firing defensively in every direction.

She sensed it before she saw it, there was something up ahead. Rey slowed and brought the blaster up.

A figure stepped out from behind a tree. She froze when she recognized it as the man from the vision. Much like he did then, he wore no shirt leaving his scarred chest bear. He wore long pants and a silver helmet covered his head. On one hand, he held a red lightsaber.

Shocked, she merely stood there as he turned and noticed her. The hairs at the back of her neck rose up, and her hand began to tremble. For a second she almost dropped the blaster, but then without even realizing it before she did, she pulled the trigger. The helmeted man didn't so much as flinch as he deflected the blast with his lightsaber. That prompted Rey to fire again and again yet each shot was deflected just as easily. His face was hiding behind the helmet but she could almost tell that he was smiling underneath it. Terrified, she realized that this was clearly a game to him. He was playing with her.

Eventually, he seemed to tire of their game. He raised a hand, holding it toward her. Instantly her body froze, and she inhaled sharply. She tried to turn, to run, but her legs refused to respond. She could only stand there wide-eyed as he came towards her.

The man halted right in front of her, his head tilting to one side as he studied her.

"Could it really be?"

She had barely even heard what he had said, she was much more preoccupied with the lightsaber he still held in his hand. The man walked slowly around her paralyzed body. Frightened, she tried to follow him with her eyes, but even her head would not turn. Having circled her, he moved even closer, peering into her face. Then he brought his hand up and grasped her chin between his fingers.

"This won't hurt one bit."

_~K~_

Reaching the outdoors after having worked their way through mounds of debris, Kylo and the others kept close to the destroyed stone walls. He looked up at the swarm of TIE fighters flying above them. If he wanted to remain out of the First Order's grasp he better find transportation off this planet and fast.

Maz suddenly stopped, the others soon followed.

"Rey and BB-8, they need you. Now go.

Finn looked back the way they had come as if looking for something.

"I need a weapon."

Kylo rolled his eyes but didn't comment as he kept an eye on the stormtroopers that hadn't noticed them yet. Maz grabbed the wrist holding the lightsaber and raised it up.

"You have one!"

Finn stared down at her, then at the sabre almost as if he didn't get it. Eventually, the ex-stormtrooper activated the lightsaber. Hearing the familiar humming sound of a sabre, Kylo turned his head. Finn held the lightsaber in hand his eyes fixed on it as he admired the beam. Even he couldn't help but admire it. The lightsaber of Anakin Skywalker, his grandfather.

With neither Kylo or Finn keeping an eye on the incoming stormtroopers, they were both easily found and the troopers wasted no time to target them. Taking cover, Han and Chewbacca returned fire. Kylo reached for his own blaster and began to fire at them with lethal precision.

"You got some good aim kid," Han remarked when Kylo shot three stormtroopers in the head.

Kylo looked down at his father for a second, faltering.

"TRAITOR!"

Everyone turned around, surprised by the Stormtrooper approaching Finn. none of them had the chance to watch them fight as more blaster shots came their way, prompting them to turn back to their own fight.

_~R~_

"Hmm, I can't really find anything. Nothing special about you is there?" Ren shut down and belted his lightsaber. He contemplated his captive. Rey refused to meet his gaze, she looked away, straining with the hold he had on her. She didn't so much as dare breathe.

"Still, can't rule out anything just yet-and what is this I see?"

How did he know all these things? She was terrified as she stared back at him. Surely she hadn't thought it! She'd tried to keep her mind blank, her memory locked, and still, he had wormed his way in. He was within her mind and her thoughts, and there was nothing, _nothing_ , she could do to keep him out.

"You've seen it, the map!"

She could hardly swallow as she tried to pull away from him.

She wanted to scream, but even that he would not allow.

_~F~_

The trooper who was fighting Finn was big, strong, agile, and considerably more experienced. Had it not been for him holding the greater weapon, Finn knew he would have long lost the fight. Still, that didn't stop the trooper from eventually knocking Finn to the ground and raising his own weapon for a killing strike. Finn stared up at the trooper's helmet eyes, his frightened reflection painted on them. The blow never came however, the trooper fell backwards instead.

Rolling over, Finn gave out a relieved sigh as he saw Kylo, blaster in hand, with Chewbacca and Han. The oldest of the two men reached down and helped Finn to his feet.

"You okay, big deal?"

Finn nodded and looked at Kylo. "Yeah, thanks." For a second there he really thought he was dead.

No one could speak more on the matter as, out of nowhere, a dozen stormtroopers appeared and aimed their weapons straight at their heads.

"Don't move!" The captain trooper ordered. "TK-338, we have targets in custody!"

Finn and the others glared at the troopers but they had no other choice but to comply. He doesn't know much about Jedi's, but he doubted even Kylo could win against a dozen troopers simultaneously shooting at his head. One trooper eyed the lightsaber and quickly picked it up.

They didn't try anything. Instead, they all put their hands behind their heads and went where the troopers led them. Finn's mind races as he figures out how to get out of this predicament. He honestly had no clue. Thankfully he didn't have to force himself to come up with a plan as he heard a low rumbling coming from behind them.

Simultaneously, Finn and the others turned their heads towards the loud rumbling that made the very ground shake. In his life as a stormtrooper, he has never been so happy to see a squadron of X-wings.

The familiar crafts flew low and fast, roaring over the lake and the forest, not at all afraid or intimidated by the TIE Fighters blocking their way. Chewbacca was the first out of all of them to voice his surprise with a loud roar.

"It's the Resistance!" Han murmured, relief clear in his voice.

Finn smiled, finally understanding the hope of seeing those crafts brought all those fighting against the First Order. His eyes struggled to follow the X-Wings as they disperse to chase and target tactical points of their own. One craft, in particular, caught his attention. It stood out among all other with it's black and orange stripes. He watched in awe as the craft swooped dangerously low and blasted TIE fighter after TIE fighter from the ground, as well as unsuspecting troopers all this without wasting a single energy blast.

Seeing the fight turn its tides, their captives dove for cover and tried to fight back against the resistance. Finn and the others didn't waste any time in recovering their weapons. Turning his gaze skyward, Finn followed the black X-wing as it looped around at an impossible angle.

"That's one helluva pilot!"

_~R~_

At the sound of nearby explosions, Ren ceased his probing, but he did not remove his hand from Rey's face as he turned toward the now ruined castle. She remained standing before him, unable to move, gazing blankly into the distance. A handful of stormtroopers came toward them through the trees.

"Sir," the leader gasped. "Resistance fighters!"

Ren considered what to do. He would love to go out there himself and cut some heads, or even better, go after the traitor but he has his orders. If it were not for the girl he would gladly go against those orders, but this is something even he does not dare disobey. If there's one thing his master is particularly good at, it would be torturing.

"Always ruining the fun aren't they? Well no matter, we got what we need." Ren turned to face her. "Pull the division out. Forget the droid. We have what we need."

The squad leader saluted and left.

Ren merely flicked his wrist and the girl collapsed like a marionette that just had it's string cut off. He stepped over her unconscious body without so much as glancing back. He pointed back at her.

"Get her all neatly wrapped up, this one's coming with us."

_~F~_

Two, troopers running away from the X-Wings were taken out by Finn. Behind him was Kylo, both of them looking around the battlefield in desperation. Eventually, Finn found his attention drawn to a singular figure striding through the edge of the forest. He nearly missed it but he easily managed to identify both the man but more importantly the figure a couple of troopers were dragging to a shuttle. Finn's stomach plunged.

"REY!"

Ignoring the fire of retreating stormtroopers, paying no attention to the blasts from X-Wings and TIE fighters, Finn raced toward the shuttle only to watch helplessly as it lifted off and rose toward the clouds. Kylo followed closely behind, albeit more tensely, his eyes on the shuttle as it left.

"No, no, no, no… Rey!"

Out of breath, tears glistening on his cheeks, Finn slowed as he walked alongside Han.

"He took her!" Finn managed to gasp. "He took her! Did you see that? She's gone, Rey's gone!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know…" Han said.

_~K~_

Finn stood there for a few seconds, shocked as he looked at Han walking away not at all caring that they had taken Rey. Kylo, on the other hand, wasn't at all surprised. A girl he's known for a mere few hours? Even he didn't understand why he felt so worried about her but he has more concerning things to think about, Ren being one of them. He had frozen on the spot when he has spotted him. He suspected that Ren no doubt was aware of his presence yet didn't make a move to go after him, in fact, he seemed far more interested in the girl. Why? Kriff knows why, but one thing's for sure. If Ren is willing to let him go after finally finding him after so many years, then Rey's no mere sand rat.

"She'll be alright, she's strong with the force they won't kill her," he assured Finn, not really sure why he was trying to make him feel better. Or was it himself he was trying to reassure?

Finn turned to look at him, no trace of hope in his eyes.

"How can you be so sure? The First Order, they're monsters there's no telling what they'll do to her!"

Kylo realized that he may just have shared a little too much information on his knowledge of the First Order.

"I used to be a Jedi once remember, I know what the knights of Ren do with force sensitives."

Before Finn could ask a question Kylo tapped Finn's shoulder and walked towards the direction Han had left.

"Come on."

Finn followed him to the X-wings and the newly landed transporter. Kylo had this attention on the aftermath before him. Troopers putting down their blasters and rebels nudging them towards the transporter. The outside of the castle was a mess, rocks and stones belonging to the structure laid all around the forest. Troopers, and civilians were scattered all around the ground, dead. All things considered, it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

Finally, among the rebels standing around the transport, Kylo looked at his father and that's when he noticed her. His eyes widened. Before him, was his mother, she was busy talking to Han. She hadn't yet noticed him but that didn't last long. As if she could finally sense him, he watched as his mother tensed and slowly turned her head towards him.

Their eyes met and for a second it was as if everything stopped.

"Ben."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course, I had to post a chapter on May 4th, even if I had to put all my assignments aside!
> 
> Anyways sorry for the late update, I've been busy with school and on my other stories that have not been updated for far longer. I will always get a new chapter out there even if it takes me a little while. Anyways, we finally reached the meeting between Leia and Ben. I won't say anything on the matter so I don't spoil it!
> 
> so thanks for reading, supporting this story, commenting, and see you guys next time!


	13. Chapter 13

~Rey~

Rey woke up slowly. Disoriented, she looked around confused. She was in a dark metallic room in which she thought she was alone, that is until her eyes landed on the other person. He didn't so much as move, not even a sound as he stared at her.

She tried to move but realized she couldn't, this time not because she was being held hostage by an invisible force. Rey looked down and saw the restraining apparatus holding her in place against an angled platform.

Startled, and confused she blinked, her eyes going from one point of the room to the other. The last thing she remembered was the confrontation in the forest on Takodana, especially the mind probe. The pain. She had done her best to shut it out, but her mental defences were easily brushed aside. Now the forest was gone, everyone was gone, all except the masked man in front of her that terrified her more than she'll ever admit.

"Where am I?"

He chuckled, amused by the anger in her voice.

"Touchy aren't you?" Rey glared at him, her jaws tightening. "You should just relax and enjoy the ride sweetheart, we're halfway across the outer rim. It'll be a couple more days until we reach our destination. You don't want to spend the ride making an enemy out of us."

Frowning, she indignantly looked past him. She refused to comply with a monster. She knew he was telling the truth, she could feel the telltale rumbling of the ship meaning that they're currently flying through light speed.

"Where are the others?

He waved his hand dismissively.

"You got bigger problems than worrying about a handful of traitors and rebels."

She stared at him. Though at the moment he was calm and almost in a joking mood, she could not escape the feeling that a wrong word could easily set him off. With this person, she had to tread carefully.

He tilted his head as if she had just spoken aloud. She cursed herself. She should have remembered that he can read her mind, might as well have voiced her thoughts.

"Oh, you hate me don't you?" He asked, clearly amused.

Rey didn't respond; she simply turned her head so that she was no longer looking at him. When she heard a soft click it prompted her to turn her gaze back on him. He slowly removed his helmet. She just stared at him in silence.

She didn't know what to expect but it was definitely not a middle-aged man with graying hair. Unlike the rest of his body, he was devoid of any scars, but his skin looked rough with a short stubble. He was smiling at her charmingly, much like many of the visiting pilots used to smile at the woman in Niima Outpost. But there was that gaze, the kind of gaze that warned her that he is no normal man.

"Well aren't I pretty?" Rey didn't respond. If she ever showed any interest in anyone it'll definitely be on somebody close to her own age, not a man that could very well pass off as her own father. "You know you remind me of my daughter."

Rey jerked her head to look at him, wondering where that self-revelation had come from.

"She died of course, and I devoted myself completely to the dark," he turned and put his helmet down on the table. "Now, I know what you're thinking." He faced her once more and gestured with his finger. "What a boring and typical story. Father loses daughter, father turns to evil etc, etc."

Rey didn't make a move to answer him, but the man didn't seem to care as he continued to talk. "Yea I think that too, I myself would have preferred something more dramatic you know. But anyway, don't think that the similarities between my daughter and you will stop me from torturing you. You see she was kind of an idiot, so I killed her."

Straining against her restraints Rey tried to move away from the man as he approached her and raised his hands towards her face. His warm hand touched her temple, and Rey's breath began to quicken as she prepared for another mind probe.

"Names Ren by the way. Mind if I take another look inside your head?"

She knew resisting would be pointless not to mention painful. Still, she couldn't just stand there and allow him to waltz inside her head like Kylo had done. At the thought of Kylo, she was filled with dread. She hoped he and Finn made it out alright.

As she strained to resist the probe, he pushed into her, brushing aside her awkward attempts to keep him out. While he investigated her mind, he spoke with amusement and venom dripping down his voice.

"I see you've met the traitor, good."

For a second Rey's eyes flew to him with shock, but she couldn't think further on what he just said as he reached further inside her head.

"What's this? You didn't know he was one of us? Well, this just keeps getting better and better," he chuckled, his eyes reflecting his insanity. "We should both sit down sometime so I can give you the whole story of how he helped burn and murder entire villages."

Rey looked at him in disbelief. He was lying, he had to be. She knows Kylo is arrogant and a jerk and from what she's saw when she looked inside his head, he's far from innocent but a murder like this man? He couldn't be. He helped them get out of Jakku, he did threaten to kill them when they first met but he doesn't strike her as the type of monster like Ren. He had to be lying to make her question herself.

"You two were buddies I see, too bad you won't see him again. After I'm done with you I'll go after him."

All the rage and terror bottled up inside her came out as she turned to meet his stare. That only prompted him to smile even wider.

"Did I hit a nerve? Don't want me touching any of your friends do you?"

Rey's nose flared.

"Get—out—of—my—head."

It only made him lean in closer, enhancing her feeling of complete helplessness.

Tears were streaming down her face from the effort she was making to withstand him. Desperate, she did try to strikeout. But just as on Takodana, her body refused to respond. Where the strength to defy him came from she did not know, but if anything, her voice grew a little stronger.

"You won't get anything from me!"

"Whatever you say, sweetheart."

Narrowing his gaze and his focus, he locked eyes with her. She met his stare without trying to look away. She should have looked away. It would have been the rational thing to do. The sane thing to do. Instead, she just glared, trying not to flinch, not to blink.

He reached far inside her mind to places even she didn't know existed. There was something there of interest to him as he shifted his focus towards it, seeking to identify, to analyze, to—

It shocked her as much as it did him when he encountered an unyielding barrier. This time it was he, Ren who blinked, confusion clear in his eyes. He pushed, hard, with his mind and the probe went nowhere.

A look of amazement replaced the fear on Rey's face as she discovered herself inside his mind instead. Stunned at the realization, she found herself inexorably drawn to—to…

"You," she heard herself saying clearly, a tear falling down her cheek at what she saw. "You are a monster."

His hand pulled slowly away from her cheek. Confused, he stepped back from her, the smile gone. Her gaze followed him. After several seconds of just staring at her his smile returned.

"You are full of surprises aren't you?"

He turned around and once again donned his helmet.

"Go to hell!" She spat.

Ren chuckled.

"You should treat me a little more nicely you know, after all, I know who you really are Rey."

That made Rey backtrack. Her eyes widened, her body freezing. What did he just say?

"Wh-"

"Sorry, said too much. It's not my secret to give but you'll know as soon as I get you bagged and shipped to your new destination."

He turned. All the while she looked at him confused, for the first time she actually wanted to talk to him, she wanted him not to leave.

"you'll be a nice surprise for my master."

With that he was gone, leaving Rey with a thousand questions.

~Ren~

In the corridor, a smiling Ren was looking at the other knights. He hadn't expected the girl to block him and enter his mind instead, that definitely had been unsettling. Still, that only proved that she has to be who they've been looking for all this time, it was the only explanation. No normal force-sensitive could figure out how to put up a mental block with no formal training. She has to be her.

"Find anything?" Trudgen asked.

Ren chuckled and nodded.

"Oh yes." He didn't say more on the matter as he sidestepped them and walked down the corridor.

"I'm taking my shuttle to Star Killer, Snoke wants me there in case there are any complications."

Snoke may not be his real master but he still has to maintain appearance. He wanted to take the girl to his master himself, but duties are duties.

"What of the girl?"

Ren stopped and turned to look at them. All six of them stood by the door to the holding cell, awaiting his command. There was no better place to keep the girl than with his fellow knights. Knowing who she is, who her family is, he wouldn't feel confident in leaving her with anyone else. They will make sure she doesn't get any ideas.

"Maintain your course for Exegol," he ordered. "If this girl is who we think she is… then you better not mess this up."

Ren turned once more and continued to walk towards his destination.

"Oh, and we still need information on the droid. Don't bother trying to search her mind, you won't get anything, so use the good old method instead."

Trudgen and the other knights didn't require any further clarification as they turned on the spot and opened the door to the holding cell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that went differently, didn't it? As you can see things are already starting to change. Rey is being taken straight to Exegol instead of Star Killer so that's going to make a lot of changes, won't it?
> 
> Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter, please comment and see you guys next time!


	14. Chapter 14

~K~

D'Qar's terrain was green and lush, with flourishing trees that put those on most worlds to shame in size and appearance.

Careful not to damage a single one of the immense, unique plants, the Resistance squadron landed between them. Forage camouflaged hangars and other structures. Resistance techs were everywhere, repairing damaged craft, running cables and cleaning. The base was a hive of activity, nearly all of which was hidden from above. One restoration team instantly ran to the Millennium Falcon when it landed.

A group of people, both rebels and none rebels, walked towards a hangar bay. Kylo walked in the middle, flanked by two rebels, in front of him were his parents. Much like the trip from Takodana, no one said a word. By keeping his mind blank, he managed to keep his emotions in check and stop his anger from flaring up. First Han Solo, and now Leia Organa. Just perfect.

Inside the hangar, there were a lot of techs working on the X-wings that's just returned from battle. Pilots were exiting their ships, visibly exhausted from the fight yet they stuck around to help the others. Everyone present in the hangar had something to do but the General walked inside the hangar bay, they all instantly stopped what they were doing to look at her. Kylo rolled his eyes when he noticed the way everyone was looking at Leia almost reverently. However, when their gaze switched to him their eyes narrowed, suspicious of him.

Not having any unoccupied room, Leia settled with leading them to a secluded area in the hangar, one where the other couldn't pry unless they really tried.

"You may return to your duties," Leia ordered the two rebels escorting them. Both men gave Kylo narrowed looks and left them without a word.

Father, mother and son remained quiet, not saying a word to no another, the buzzing of the people in the hangar sounding louder than it was. None of them knew what to say, the last time they had all been together had been twenty-two years ago.

As expected, it was Leia who broke the silence first.

"Ben…"

"Don't." Kylo shook his head, looking at some greasy panel rather than his mother.

If he looked at her he knew he'd see the pain in her eyes, the sadness as well as the joy of finally seeing him. Hating his father has always been easy, but his mother? It has always been difficult. He knew he had many reasons to hate her but for some reason he's always had to force himself to do so, to see the many faults in her parenting. If he looked at her he feared he might crack.

More silence befell them, none of them knew how to go from there. It was after a little over a minute that Kylo couldn't take the awkward silence but rather than breaking the silence, he simply turned and made to walk back to the hangar. He couldn't take the family reunion, he had to leave. There were plenty of ships lying around, he was sure he could find one and leave the planet, go on the run and forget about everything.

"Where are you going?" Asked Han.

"Away."

Kylo could only take another step before Han spoke up again.

"Come on kid, you've only just arrived."

Freezing on the spot, Kylo looked at Han over his shoulder. That sounded an awful lot like something he didn't want to hear.

"Arrived where?"

Silence once more dominated the small area, until finally, Leia decided to speak once more. What she said next made him take in a sharp breath.

"Home."

For a few seconds, they all just stared at each other. Not sure where it had come from, or why, Kylo laughed. It was unlike any other laugh for there was no amusement behind it, the sound was empty, devoid of any emotion but anger. As fast as it came it went as Kylo shook his head in disbelief.

"I know what your plan is General and it's not going to work," he said coldly.

Turning on the spot, full of anger and resentment towards the man and woman before him he mustered the courage to look at his mother. As he had expected, he faltered a little when he noticed the way her eyes sparkled with pain but that small hesitation didn't last for long.

"You think you can just bring me here and somehow convince me to stay? And for what? So I can join your rebellion? Become your new poster boy is that it?"

The General didn't say anything, nor did she show any other emotion other than sadness, which only caused the anger in him to spark. Glaring at her, Kylo walked closer to the General. His large figure towered over her making him look intimidating and as if that wasn't enough, his brows were furrowed, his jaw clenched as he glared down at the tiny woman before him. All the terrible memories came flying back to him, all the times he was alone with no one to turn to for help, all the hate, all the pain and it was all being directed at her. Any normal person would have flinched, kriff, his father had squirmed when he had glared at him during their talk on the Falcon, but his mother? She didn't so much as move a muscle as she looked up and met his eyes, her gaze not showing any fear. Any other man would have been surprised and backed down as he had seen countless politicians do before, but Kylo stood his ground. Her meeting his anger at full charge only made him angrier.

"I expected that from the lousy excuse of the man you call husband," Kylo hissed. He wasn't sure what he was trying to achieve, what he was trying to say. A passing thought told him that he simply wanted to make his mother as angry as he is, to make her feel what he feels.

"Boy," Han warned but Kylo didn't show any signs of having heard him as he kept glaring at his mother.

"I truly expected a little better from you General."

Once more his mother didn't say a word nor did her expression change. Kylo balled his hands up into fists. He took a step forward so that he was closer to his mother but she still refused to move even as a mountainous figure of anger stood before her, ready to blow at any minute.

"Finally being reunited with your only son after thirteen years and all you can think of is your pitiful rebellion, and how you can use him as a weapon," he growled frighteningly soft.

There aren't many things that could affect the General, but that seemed to have done the work. His mother took in a deep sharp breath, and her eyes widened, clearly taken aback but not enough to step back. He honestly didn't know what would be better that she faced him, or back away. Her standing her ground made him feel like he was four again, arguing with her because she wouldn't let him go see the pod races. On the other hand, her backing away only showed him how little she cared. Leia Organa does not back away from anything, not even from death, so if she did now it would only mean that she doesn't care enough to fight him, it truly was infuriating.

Kylo grit his teeth and bent at the waist so that he was face to face with her.

"I bet that now that you got me, you won't go looking for Luke. Why would you? You got the weapon you wanted General," he growled, his nose flaring. "And you call yourself his sist-"

He couldn't end his sentence, at first, he didn't understand why he had stopped but when he felt the sharp sting on his cheek he understood why. Leia, his mother had slapped him across the cheek. The sound had been so loud that it caused all those who hadn't already put everything down to listen to what was happening, to stop what they were doing and turned to look at the small secluded area.

Everything grew quiet for Kylo, the buzzing of people inaudible to him as he looked at his mother, both of their eyes wide in equal shock. When he was a boy she had slapped his father a few times when he was being difficult, of course never with any actual anger behind it, mostly just out of affection, but never had she slapped him. Even when she had visited him back at the academy when he was a teenager and he lost that famous temper of his. The slap itself hadn't hurt, not really but it had been enough to make his mind snap back into place, the anger draining out of him.

Kylo took a deep breath but before he could say or do anything, his mother suddenly lunged at him and took him into a tight hug. For a few seconds he wondered what the kriff was happening but then his mother spoke up,

"I am so happy to see you, Ben."

Upon hearing that, Kylo frowned, unsure as to what to say or think. She hugged him for what felt like minutes when she finally separated herself from him but still held on to his arms. At that moment he could do nothing more but look down at her, his frown disappearing as she raised her hand and stroked his cheek with motherly tenderness, her eyes soft and full of sadness and paradoxically immense happiness. For a passing second, he wished he had someone tell him what to do, how to react but it was just him and he didn't know where to go from there. He had a plan laid out but that was all thrown out the window in a matter of seconds.

"My little Ben…" she smiled fondly but then her eyes sharpened out of nowhere. "Do you have any idea what you put me through?" Kylo's eyes widened a little, not having expected that reaction. "All these years I thought you were dead, I even thought about holding a burial ceremony for my own peace of mind. Do you have any idea the kind of hell you put me, us, through?" She gestured at herself and his father, her brows knit tightly together. "I couldn't even feel you in the force and now here you are, in one piece!" His mother's grip on his arms tightened, her nose flared. "All you had to do was send me some kind of message to let me know you were alive.

Kylo opened his mouth and closed it again, confused and taken aback. When he finally did speak, what came out of his mouth was pitiful.

"I- a…"

"Short for words, now that's a first. Then again, it's one of your mother's many gifts," Han chuckled.

Upon hearing him, Leia seemed to be reminded of his presence. She snapped her head to the side to look at his father, a glare targeted at him.

"I am having a word with you after, Solo." She turned her gaze back to his. "The both of you, but right now we have a far more important problem on our hands. Our family matters can wait a little while longer."

Finally, she let go of him and took a step back. He knew she was busy, countless planets have just been obliterated, he felt it through the force, all those people perished in a matter of seconds. Being the general of the rebellion she had her duties but it still stung him that she picked the rebellion over him, just like she had when he was a little boy.

Leia gave him one last look and turned on the spot to walk back to where the others were, Han one step behind her.

"What if I refuse?" He asked softly. Both of them instantly stopped and turned to look at him.

Kylo sighed.

"I'm not here to stay General. A _family_ reunion wasn't part of my plan." His voice sounded so tired, it actually surprised him a little.

Leia knit her brows.

"I want nothing more than for you to stay, but I won't stop you if you want to leave. This isn't the First Order, you're not our prisoner," she sighed and tilted her head to one side, her eyes softened. "I only ask that you give us a chance, Ben."

Jaws tightening. For a passing second, he actually considered giving them a chance, if only a few hours to speak things over but a big part of him refused the very notion. By the way Leia's shoulders slumped a little, she knew exactly what he was going to say next.

"No," was all he said. Without giving them another glance, Kylo turned on the spot and walked away. Neither of them so much as called him back.

All over the hangar, people stopped what they were doing and turned to look at him. Kylo wasn't looking at them but he could feel their eyes on the back of his head. He should have been concerned to have so many people watching him, to have so many people know who he really is but he wasn't, he couldn't care less.

While in the academy, young Ben Solo had thought about his future reunion with his parents. For the first two years or so he was looking forward to it, wanting to show his father and mother what he could do. It was seven years into his training, and of no one coming to see him that he came to terms with the bitter reality. Since then the way he imagined his reunion between him and his parents became darker and darker. He had planned as to what to say, what to do if he ever found himself in the presence of both his parents. Always expecting himself to hold dominance over the inevitable argument, and perhaps even fight. Never did he expect that he would feel so empty, so devoid of emotions after it. He didn't even know what to think.

Without even realizing it, Kylo was outside the hangar, amongst the grass and lush vegetation. His first realization that he was outside was the sun rays hitting his eyes, making him squint.

"Hey Kylo, over here!"

Frowning, a little shocked that someone knew his name but then realizing that the voice belonged to Finn, he turned his head to look towards the X-WINGS stationed outside the hangar. Finn stood beside one of the X-Wings, waving him forward.

Rolling his eyes, Kylo was about to turn and go the opposite way when he saw the man standing beside Finn.

Kylo's eyes widened.

Wasting no time, he ran towards Finn and the man he thought dead but a few hours ago, Poe.

"Kylo?" Poe asked, shocked and confused.

He wasn't sure whether he wanted to punch or, embarrassingly enough, or even hug him, in the end he settled for neither. Kylo stopped in front of him, looking down at the pilot in shock.

"What the hell are you doing here man?" Asked Poe with a smile on his face, clearly shocked but happy to see him.

"You're alive?" Kylo said more to himself, still not believing that the pilot was indeed in front of him.

"Course I'm alive, why wouldn't I be?" Poe crossed his arms and frowned."How did you find me?"

"I put a tracker on your X-Wing and BB-8 a while back."

Poe glared down at BB-8 knowing full well that he must have known about the tracker. The little droid lowered its head and gave out a soft beep, as if ashamed for not having told him.

Poe huffed, looked back at him and spoke.

"But-"

Kylo interrupted him, too shocked and in need of answers.

"What the hell happened to you? Finn said you died escaping the First Order." Kylo looked at the ex-stormtrooper for a brief second then back to Poe. By the look on Finn's face, he too was surprised to see the pilot alive.

Poe shrugged and smirked cockily.

"I'm more resourceful than you give me credit for." Poe tilted his head to one side. "My ship was shut down and I managed to escape the wreckage. I made contact with the rebellion and now here I am."

There was more to the story, Kylo knew and he wanted to ask more questions but before he could Poe took a step forward and continued to speak.

"More importantly, what the hell are you doing here?"

Both Finn and Poe looked at him.

"I lost signal with your X-Wing, I knew you must have been captured so I went to rescue you," he answered.

Knowing better than most, Poe frowned, clearly confused. Kylo knew that Poe never expected him to care enough to put his life on the line to save him. He wasn't kidding himself either, he thought that too.

For a little while, Poe just stared at him, then suddenly his eyes softened, a large smile dominated his face.

Poe chuckled and shook his head in wonder.

"Kylo the smuggler, the I don't work well with others, leaving his much-beloved hole in the ground he calls home to come and save me." Poe placed his hand on Kylo's shoulder. "You are my hero."

Kylo huffed, annoyed and shook off Poe's hand.

"Don't get used to it, I've learned my lesson. Never to come and save you again."

Poe chuckled and Kylo shook his head. For a brief second, he forgot about his family reunion, his life that's been more or less destroyed in a matter of two days. He felt like he was back in Hosnian Prime having a drink with Poe in some dingy bar in the lower city. Everything was so easy then.

Eyes softening, Kylo opened his mouth to speak but he was interrupted by Finn before he could say anything.

"Look I'm glad you're both reunited and all but this is urgent."

Poe and Kylo turned to look at Finn. Wiping the smile off his face, adopting a more serious expression, Poe straightened his back looking every inch the commander he is.

"Yeah sorry." Poe waved his hand. "Just that I never expected him of all people to be here."

Finn nodded, fully understanding. Kylo knew that even Finn must find it odd that he had gone out of his way to save anyone. The ex-stormtrooper may have only known him for a day or so but it is clear that he knows the kind of man he is. For someone so useless Finn is much more perceptive than he initially thought.

"So anyways Finn, you said you met a Jedi that could help us get your friend? Honestly, I'm surprised, I've never met a Jedi before. I'm kinda curious to meet him." Poe looked around as if trying to find the Jedi amongst the other rebels. As for Kylo, his muscles tensed when he heard the word Jedi.

Finn frowned, a little confused and no doubt wondering if Poe was messing with him.

"What do you mean? Of course you've met a Jedi before."

Poe turned his gaze back to Finn and shrugged.

"Nah, never. They're pretty rare especially after that incident at the Jedi temple a few years back, no one here's met a Jedi except those that fought in the war against the empire."

Finn's frown deepened, more confused than before. Kylo wished that Finn would just keep his mouth shut.

"But you know Kylo, he's a Jedi." Finn gestured at Kylo. "How else do you think we got here in one piece? He helped us."

For a few seconds all three of them just looked at each other, Kylo with a murderous look in his eyes directed straight at Finn, while Poe looked more confused than ever. Poe may be his best and only friend but he's never told him about his past, not even about being force sensitive.

Comically, Poe looked from Finn to Kylo as if trying to understand what he's just heard. His shock didn't last long as his mouth dropped open, his brows raised.

"You gotta be shitting me!" Poe looked at him in surprise disbelief. "You're a magical monk and you never told me?"

Kylo rolled his eyes.

"I'm not a monk and it's called the force."

"The hell to what it's called, you never told me you were a Jedi!"

Kylo shrugged, trying to not make a big deal out of it.

"I never told anyone."

He really hadn't, as far as he knew the only ones that knew were Luke, Han, Leia, the knights of Ren and Snoke. There was a time when he wanted to tell Poe but he decided against it. He feared that Poe might see him differently if he knew he's force sensitive.

"Yes but I'm your best friend, you could have just said, hey, by the way, I'm a kriffing Jedi!"

"I'm not a Jedi," Kylo quickly corrected. A bitterness to his voice.

Poe didn't seem to catch his dislike of being called a Jedi as he waved his hand dismissively.

"But you can use the force?" Poe asked.

"Yes but that doesn't mean I'm one of them," he answered, annoyed.

"But you were trained?"

"Yes."

"And you have a lightsaber?"

Kylo sighed, exasperated. He wished Poe would go back to being dead.

"Yes," he hissed.

Poe waved his arms.

"Then how the kriff are you not a Jedi?"

"Because…" Kylo felt the gazes of half the people in the landing bay on him."It's a long story, one I don't have the time or energy to tell at this very moment," he answered vaguely. He didn't want, nor did he have the time to give Poe the entire story. "So if you'll excuse me, I've done what I set out to do. You're alive, and this idiot here's delivered the droid. I got nothing more to do here."

Kylo sidestepped them and walked away. He wanted to stay a little while longer to talk some more with the pilot but he knew he couldn't. He needed to leave this planet before something else happened.

"Where will you go? I don't know if you heard but the Hosnian system's been destroyed." Poe asked, concern clear in his voice.

"Gotta start a life somewhere else I suppose," he answered, not turning back.

Poe sighed.

"There's nothing I can say to keep you here, is there? We could use your help."

Kylo stopped and turned his head.

"No."

Poe crossed his arms, clearly disappointed by the answer.

"I thought as much. Well at least keep me in touch will ya?"

He wasn't above lying but it somehow felt a little wrong to lie to Poe and right in his face no less. Kylo wasn't a fool, he knew he wasn't likely to see Poe again. Last time he had refused to leave the known universe this time he won't make the same mistake, he didn't have any other choice. The knights know about him, they'll stop at nothing to capture or kill him.

Kylo nodded and turned around.

"Wait, Kylo you can't just leave now. What about Rey?"

The name Rey made him stop for a brief second. By now she must be in some cell, getting tortured by Ren. That realization gave him an odd sensation in his chest. He felt guilty about leaving the girl to such a fate, she didn't deserve it but he couldn't put his neck on the line for her. Back in Takodana he was strangely overcome with the need to make sure she's alright. Never in his life had he felt anything like that and weirder still was that the feeling hadn't left him entirely. He still felt the need to go and save the girl. For someone that's always been controlled by his emotions, he was unwilling to let it control him this time. He simply couldn't go save her, he knew what would be required of him if he did. He couldn't beat Ren with just a blaster, he would need the full use of the force and his lightsaber and he simply couldn't do that. He left that life behind, he wasn't going to throw what little hope he had left for some sand rat.

Kylo closed his eyes for a brief second then reopened them, making up his mind.

"She's not my responsibility."

With that Kylo continued to walk down the landing, no looking back but knowing that Finn and Poe were both looking at him with disapproval.

"What? No- I can't- wait Kylo!" Finn called after him.

Kylo didn't stop walking, even when he heard Finn's footsteps following him. People stared at both of them.

With his long strides, he made it to the Falcon in no time. He could have taken any other ship, but he didn't want to go through the hassle of stealing a ship. The old freighter is a piece of junk that should have been sent to a scrap yard long ago, as soon as he's on another planet he'll make sure to trade it for something else. He figured several collectors would love to get their hands on the Millenium Falcon, the ship of the legendary _Han Solo._ They can have it for all he cares.

Sitting on the pilot's seat, he began pressing buttons and making calculations for light speed, vaguely hearing the footsteps making their way to the cockpit.

"what are you doing?" Finn asked, standing by the entrance of the cockpit.

Kylo pressed another button and stretched out his body and arm to reach the opposite side to press another button on the copilot's panel.

"Leaving, so if you want me to give you a lift I suggest you buckle down and shut up."

He didn't want to be around the ex-stormtrooper any longer but he was feeling generous. Finn is after all on the same boat as him. He too wants to escape the First Order and his old life.

"But we can't leave!"

Kylo didn't turn to look at him as he kept pressing buttons, getting the ship ready for takeoff. With or without Finn, he was leaving this planet.

"Why not? That's all you wanted a few hours ago, wasn't it? To leave and forget about the war? Well wish granted, now buckle up."

Finn walked inside the cockpit and stood beside Kylo, looking at him, disbelief clear in his face.

"We can't leave without Rey."

Once again, for a second he stopped at the mention of her name, his reaction made him angrier than guilty this time. Looking away from the controls and at Finn, Kylo tilted his head.

"No?" He asked. He looked back down at the panel and continued to prepare the ship.

"No, we can't!"

Kylo didn't even acknowledge Finn this time, which had been the last straw for the ex-stormtrooper. Taking a step towards the panel, Finn slammed his hand against the controls, stopping Kylo from pressing any more buttons.

For a brief second silence dominated the cockpit.

"This isn't the time to test my patience Finn" Kylo hissed softly.

Finn looked at him unsure, clearly worried that he might lunge at him and yet he didn't step back.

"Yea? Well, I don't care, I won't let you leave Rey behind."

For the first time since meeting him, Kylo was a little impressed. Finn's a coward, any idiot could see that and yet here he was, standing up to him. There aren't many people stupid enough to do that, especially when they know he's force sensitive and can easily cut him in half with his lightsaber. Still, it didn't make him any less annoyed or angry in fact it only made it worse.

Finn sighed, and took his hand away from the panel, no doubt realizing that he shouldn't push him any further.

"Look, I don't care what happened back there, or any issues you may have with the Resistance, I couldn't give to kriffs about that." Finn leaned down a little to look at him straight in the eyes. "But this isn't about the Resistance, it's about Rey. She needs us Kylo- Ben whatever your name is. Rey trusted us, and now she's alone with that _thing_ probably awaiting torture then execution, can you really live with yourself if you leave?"

Kylo, who had his hand on a lever, tightened his hold on it.

Finn shook his head.

"look I'm not an idiot I know I can't rescue her, but you can, you're a Jedi. If anyone can help her it's you."

Finn let out a deep breath he had no doubt been holding. The ex-stormtrooper probably wanted to say all those things for a long while and was now relieved that he made his case and was still in one piece. In fact, Kylo figured that he must think that he managed to change his mind as he saw a small smile form on his lips.

Kylo sighed.

"Whatever you think I am Finn, I'm not a hero and I'm definitely not a Jedi. It isn't my job to go save some girl because she was dumb enough to get caught, and I definitely don't owe it to anyone to do anything."

The smile that was forming on Finn's lips disappeared as he stepped back and shook his head in disbelief.

"How can you just leave her? Don't you care? If not for her then for another person's life?"

Did he care? Did he care about another person's life? Looking deep inside himself, it was a little disconcerting that he didn't. People die every day, it's nature, especially when there's a war. He couldn't possibly be expected to care for another person's life.

"No." Kylo turned his seat to face Finn, a frown on his face. "I don't have the luxury to _care._ You think that just because I got the force I can just walk into a high-security base to get a girl I've only known for a day?" Kylo shook his head. "No, I'm sorry Finn but I don't feel like lying down my life today."

Kylo turned his seat and pressed the last two buttons, Finn stood behind him for a few seconds, just watching him.

"Then you might as well be in the First Order." With that Finn turned and left.

~ _H_ ~

Han walked to the cockpit of the Falcon, deep in thought when he saw an angry Finn walking towards him.

"Something wrong big deal?"

Uncharacteristic of him, Finn didn't so much as look at him as he stormed past him. Confused, and a little shocked, Han looked back at the kid, brow raised. There was only one explanation for his weird behaviour. He must have talked to Ben.

Han shook his head. Ben could never get along with anyone as a child, not surprising that's still the case in his adult years.

Sighing, he walked to the cockpit. Ben was sitting on the pilot's seat, his seat, looking down at the controllers.

"Everything all right kid?"

It was a little amusing how Ben jerked a little on the spot, not hearing him come in. Turning his seat, Ben looked up at him, a frown on his face. Han knew Ben's angry with him, when is he not? Still, he couldn't help but remember the image of Ben sitting on the chair as a boy, a wide smile on his lips.

"I hope you're not here to stop me from leaving or taking the Falcon. That wouldn't end well for you."

Han quirked a brow.

"Who's stopping you?"

Han reached inside his pocket and threw an object at Ben. The kid caught it midair with little effort. Curious, clear in his eyes, Ben opened his hand and looked at the familiar set of golden dice, the ones he used to steal from him to play with as a child.

Ben looked up, frown deepening.

"You'll need a ship to get to where you're going. She ain't the newest or the prettiest, but she'll do her job."

Still confused, no doubt not expecting such an act of fatherly love or charity from him, Han sighed and rubbed the back of his head. He clearly did mess up big time with the boy.

"Look, I know you don't want to hear it but I know I wasn't the best dad, kriff I never should have become a dad." Han waved his hand. "I never stay in one place longer than a year, I don't have the same emotional _openness_ your mother has. It was easier for me to teach you how to hold a blaster than to say I love you. And when the time came to drop you off at the academy I did my best not to think too much about leaving you behind."

He watched as Ben tensed, his hand containing the set of dice balling up into a fist. Ben didn't want to hear it, he knew but he had to say it.

"You have every right to hate me and I don't deserve your forgiveness kid but I do owe you an explanation." Han sighed, feeling so vulnerable saying all this stuff. "I never came back because I thought it would be better for you. It was the hardest thing I had to do, especially when I knew you'd hate me for it."

Han closed his eyes for a brief second, finding it oddly difficult to speak.

"The way I see it, you don't need me son. You had your mom and uncle who are force sensitive, you didn't need me messing things up. I realized that after one of the many arguments me and your mom had. You weren't living a proper life a kid should have, you weren't around other kids your age, you got into fights due to the problems at home and I was the one causing all those problems. My fault I know, so the only logical explanation was to leave."

Remembering that day when he heard Ben had hurt yet another kid in school a day after an argument he had with Leia, he sighed. Han always knew he could do anything that life threw at him, how wrong he was.

"I am sorry kid, for everything. I wasn't the father you deserved."

Silence dominated the cockpit. As he had expected, Ben was looking up at him, anger clear in his eyes but he didn't say anything. He would have given anything to hear that he was forgiven but for now, he settled with finally explaining himself. Besides, he doubted that if Ben forgave him he wouldn't accept it, nothing anyone said could change what he did.

It was after what felt like hours that Ben finally broke the silence.

Closing his eyes, and giving out a deep sigh his eyes softening, Ben spoke.

"Goodbye Solo."

It was a little painful that that was all Ben could have to say, a simple goodbye but he accepted it, his response better than he had expected. He thought the kid would get angry at him, yell at him even.

Han smirked, but there was pain behind his eyes.

"Goodbye yourself Solo." His brows knit together. "And take care"

With that, Han turned and exited the cockpit. It was painful to leave his son once more, even more, painful that it was his son this time who was leaving him behind. But that was parenthood he supposed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, a lot of emotions in this chapter and really fast-paced? What else could you expect from a Solo family reunion? A lot of things happened at once here, but to be honest I had no choice. Next chapter we're headed to Star Killer. Yes, the moment climax of this part of the story is finally here!
> 
> Anyways, thanks for your support, it means a lot to me. As always, thank you for reading, please comment and see you guys next time.


	15. Chapter 15

The engines rumbled, ready to make the jump to lightspeed yet it remained on the same spot, idling.

Sitting on the pilot's chair, Kylo looked out the glass of the cockpit, a frown dominating his face. In front of the Millenium Falcon was D'Qar, the planet housing the rebel base, the place he'd only left a few minutes ago, determined to never come back and yet here he was, hesitating. It angered him but also confused him. He was determined to leave, determined to leave everything behind once and for all and never come back. Even more frustrating was the thing keeping him from leaving. It wasn't his parents, nor Poe, much less the knowledge that the resistance will no doubt be destroyed now that the Republic is gone. No, it's Finn's last words that stayed his hand from pulling down on the lightspeed lever.

' _Then you might as well be in the First Order.'_

Worse people have said worse things to him, but that actually made him pause. Was he really just as bad as the First Order? In the end, despite all this time, is he just like Ren? Like Snoke? When he was Kylo Ren all he wanted was to be just like them, devoted to the dark, no emotions, no ties to anything but during his final test, he realized that he couldn't do it.

He remembered why he left the First Order. A knight of Ren must devote their life to the dark, to wipe all emotions but anger, something he failed to do on his final trial. Faced with the test of killing his friends, the last three Jedi that were away during the temple's destruction, Kylo refused to do as he was told.

Closing his eyes as he remembered the bitter memory, hearing the cries of help coming from his friends as Ren killed them when he refused to do it. He left the Order after that, easier said than done but regardless, he put that life behind him, he buried the persona Kylo Ren and tried his damndest to never be like that again and yet here he was, haunted by what Finn had said.

is he really just like Ren? The man that killed his friends as he made him watch? At one point he might have been like that but he refused to believe that was the case now.

' _How can you just leave her? Don't you care? If not for her then for another person's life?'_ Finn's voice resounded in his mind, and he opened his eyes.

Rey, the innocent girl that could do nothing wrong. He remembered her memory, the one he saw when he looked inside her head. She had only been a mere child, balled up into a tiny ball as she wept, no one around to hear her, no one that cared. He remembered how she felt, the sadness, anger, fear, it had been like he was feeling all that. He never really cared for anyone, he wouldn't have made it this far otherwise but at that moment he actually felt a little sorry for her, and even more infuriating, somewhat of a kinship with her. He knew what it was like to be left behind, to have no one to come to one's aid. And now Ren has her, and soon Snoke and there's nothing anyone can do about it...unless.

Kylo growled, slumping back on the seat and crossing his arms.

Could he really leave her? His dislike for her aside, can he really do it? Condemn another soul to the dark? To Snoke? She's just a girl, a girl that got caught in the crossfire, who just wanted to deliver a droid just because she knew it was the right thing to do. She didn't do it for any recognition or credits, all she wanted was to go back home, back to the junkyard, a home she refused to leave behind in hopes that she might see her family again if she stays there. A completely innocent, foolish girl.

Giving out another frustrated growl, Kylo used both of his hands to pull his hair back. He didn't believe he was actually doing this.

Putting his hands back on the controls, he cancelled the jump to lightspeed calculations and instead flew the Falcon back to D'Qar.

_~H~_

"No matter how much we fought," Leia whispered, "I always hated watching you leave."

Both she and Han were standing by a cargo ship, saying their goodbyes while Finn and Chewie prepared the ship.

Han grinned. "That's why I did it. So you'd miss me.

For the first time in quite a while, she laughed freely. It was infectious, happy, and it made his heart miss a beat. "I did miss you."

Hearing the pain behind her words, Han pulled her to him, resting her head on his chest. Just like he had felt while he was with Ben, he felt with Leia. He wished he didn't have to go, that he could stay with her. It was ironic, really. He's spent all these years running away from them and now all he's got is a few minutes, a few minutes he'd give anything to extend as much as possible but knew he couldn't. He wasn't a fool, he knew he wasn't likely to return, not this time. Still, despite his regret, his doubts, he was still going to leave, he didn't feel any regrets about that, not when doing so could keep his family safe. What he did regret is not having Ben there with them.

Han tensed and Leia looked up at him, concerned.

"What's wrong?"

Han sighed, feeling all his strength leaving him in mere seconds.

"I just wish the kid was here."

What Leia did was not what he had expected. Instead of looking just as miserable as he did, she smiled.

"What?" He asked, confused.

Leia shook her head as if she alone was privy to some secret knowledge. "Nothing, it's just that that boy's too much like his father." Han frowned and pushed her back a little so he could look at her. "Just when we need him the most, he'll turn up. Neither of you really could walk away from a fight."

As she said that, Han heard a familiar engine above them. Smiling, Leia looked up, prompting Han to do the same. The Falcon, the ship he thought he would never see again, was gleaming from the sunlight, making its way towards the runway.

"No." Han gasped, surprised.

Pilots and maintenance personnel moved out of the Falcon's way as it landed near where Han and Leia stood. Han could do nothing more but watch as the ramp of the ship lowered, revealing his son making his way down.

Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at the Falcon and at Ben who was walking towards them, his back straight, his posture that of a man sure of himself. No doubt realizing that everyone had stopped what they were doing, Finn poked his head from the ship to look at Ben, his eyes widening from surprise.

"Ben." Leia greeted him, not at all surprised. Han on the other hand was at a loss for words.

Standing in front of them, Ben raised a brow, looking down at his mother.

"You knew I was coming back."

Leia smiled tenderly.

"I am your mother, of course, I knew you'd come back." Han watched his son as he frowned, shocked and confused by her words. Noticing their son's confusion, Leia slowly raised her hand and placed it on Ben's arm. "If I'd known you wouldn't come back, I would have gone after you."

Ben stiffened at his mother's touch but didn't do anything to take her hand off of him. Leia smirked and tapped his arm one last time before lowering it.

"After all, you still owe me an explanation, Ben."

Re-gathering himself, Ben huffed and shook his head.

"I'm not here for that General," Ben turned and looked at Finn. "I'm here to rescue Rey."

Shocked wasn't enough to describe how Han was feeling. Ben, his son, the one that refused to stick around for longer than five minutes came back to save a girl he barely even knew, much less liked? He wasn't angry a Ben, quite the opposite, he too wanted to save the girl, he just never expected his son to feel the same way. Apparently he wasn't the only one.

Putting down a large box, Finn practically ran to them.

"Seriously? You're gonna help us?" He asked, shocked and excited at the same time.

Ben rolled his eyes, no doubt already regretting his decision.

"You rather I don't?"

Finn quickly waved his hands and shook his head.

"No, no, no I'm glad you're helping us. Just a little shocked is all." Finn smirked, his eyes losing that hue of dread that had dominated them before. With Ben on their side, he no doubt thought they had a better chance, and Han actually shared his feelings. "I'm just curious, what made you come back?"

For a second Han thought his son wouldn't answer, he is a man of few words after all. However, when he spoke Han was a little shocked.

"I couldn't leave someone's fate in the hands of the dark side," he answered, looking at both Han and Leia.

Han knew what he had insinuated and though he felt guilt grip him, he didn't have the time to let it consume him.

"I'm glad that you're here kiddo, we really do need your help." Han looked past his son and at his old ship. "And the Falcon as well."

Ben didn't show any emotions or even make any signs of having heard him as he looked at Finn and Chewie.

"We should leave soon, I'll help you move the stuff to the Falcon."

With that Ben made his way to the pile of boxes by the ship they were going to take, not saying another word to anyone.

Sighing once more, Han looked back at Leia. He was disappointed that his son hadn't so much as looked at him, he thought they had at least left off on somewhat good terms. As if she knew what he was thinking, Leia cupped his face and gave him a tender smile.

"He doesn't hate you Han, he just… needs time."

Han frowned, surprised to hear that Ben doesn't hate him.

"How do you know that?"

Leía shrugged.

"I am his mother, and you are his father he just needs some time to remember that."

_~K~_

Usually flying was a relaxing endeavour but not in this case. All four occupants inside the Falcon were stressed and anxious about the fight to come. The cockpit, where they all were, was quiet, not a word was said as Han and Chewie monitored the ship.

Unable to just sit there doing nothing, Kylo reached for his lightsaber and unclipped it from his belt. With Finn looking at the controls, seemingly stressed out and with Han and Chewie too busy flying, he had a little time of his own to check if the lightsaber was ready for action. Looking down at it he rotated it in his hands, feeling the familiarity the lightsaber brought him. It's been so long since he's used it, much less in combat, it made him wonder if he could still wield it. His grip tightened. There was only one way to find out.

"How are we getting in?" Finn asked.

Kylo looked up and clipped his lightsaber back on his belt.

Han explained without looking up from his console.

"Their shields have a fractional refresh rate. Keeps anything travelling slower than lightspeed from getting through."

Finn gawked, Kylo wasn't too far behind either. Looking at his father like he'd gone insane, he leaned forward.

"We're gonna make our landing approach at lightspeed?!" Finn asked before Kylo could.

Chewie roared his confirmation, fully supporting Han's suicidal plan.

"There's gotta be a better way," Kylo said, bracing himself.

"Yea and I'd love to hear em." Han flicked a switch. "Alright, Chewie, get ready."

"And Now!"

Both Finn and Kylo watched with wide eyes as Han's and Chewie's hands flew over the main console.

"And…" Han rested his hand on the lever. "NOW!"

Neither Finn nor Kylo had a chance to take in a deep breath as the Falcon exited lightspeed. Welcomed by a barrage of snow-covered trees, Chewie howled loudly enough for everyone to hear him clearly above the wild, blaring alarms.

"I am pulling up!" Han yelled as he fought with the controls.

The Falcon went plowing through the trees as both pilot and co-pilot struggled to bring the ship up. When he finally felt the ship going higher, and away from the ground, Kylo felt himself relax and easing his grip on his seat. However, when he didn't feel the Falcon going any higher, he looked at his father, wondering what the hell he was doing.

"Any higher, and they'll see us!" Han shouted. Kylo was a little surprised that he didn't think about that. The First Order is likely to be monitoring the skies at all times, but the grounds unlikely, if not at all.

The Falcon lurched downwards once more as Han and Chewbacca fought to retain control while trying to level off. They almost succeeded. Back again among the trees, Han switched and pressed some buttons. They continued to slow. In the end, it was the forest that braked them, as hundreds of trees splintered and flew around them. The descending Falcon still kept going, until finally it was stopped by the hard snow.

If none of them died today, he was going to kill Han.

_~RN~_

Walking aimlessly through the halls of Star Killer base, Ren glared at every Stormtrooper or officer that got in his way. All of them quickly scrambled away from him before he could do anything, which disappointed him. He wished he could be back on his ship, making his way to Exegol with the girl but instead he's stuck here, doing _Snoke's_ bidding.

Not all was bad though, with the destruction of the Republic the resistance is likely to strike back so a fight could break out. That would be fun, enough to keep his mind out of things but it would be even better if the traitor were to come. Unfortunately, he's unlikely to make an appearance, being too much of a coward to face him. Kylo would never come and that only angered him more, the more time passes the less likely he is of finding him, and when…

Ren suddenly stopped and turned his head to look back.

"Kylo."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I'm back again!
> 
> Honestly, the real reason why it took me this long to update is because I made a super chapter that I realized I had to cut into several parts in the end so yes, that took me a while to write. Anyways, this also means that the next updates will be coming fairly soon and trust me, the next few chapters are going to be the best.
> 
> So yea, Ben is back, I mean it's not like anyone wasn't expecting that. As for Rey, I know a lot of you want to know what's she's been up to but you guys are gonna have to be a little patient. We will get back to her, but not just yet.
> 
> So anyway, hope you liked this chapter, please comment and see you guys next time!


	16. Chapter 16

~K~

Due to the snow and the dense forest, the patrol droid did not see them. Still, they had to be careful, the last thing they needed was to be seen. Slung across the Wookiee's back was a duffel packed with advanced detonators.

Standing behind a structure, Finn moved up alongside Han and pointed. "The flooding tunnels are over that ridge. We'll get in that way."

Han looked at Finn, a bit confused.

"What was your job when you were based here?"

"Sanitation."

Both Han and Kylo gaped at him. Grabbing a handful of the ex-stormtrooper jacket, Han pulled him back to glare at him.

"Sanitation? Then how do you know how to disable the shields?"

"I don't. I'm just here to get Rey." Finn admitted, looking at Kylo for help. While Kylo was also just there to save Rey, even he was a little shocked by Finn.

Han looked like he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"People are counting on us! The galaxy is counting on us!"

Finn shook his head, not at all deterred.

"Solo, we'll figure it out! We'll use the Force!" Finn gestured at Kylo who very nearly facepalmed.

"That's not how the Force works!"

Chewie moaned.

"Oh really, you're cold?"

Kylo closed his eyes. He knew it, he was going to die here.

~H~

"Report," General Hux commanded.

Standing in the observation platform in Central Command, Hux oversaw the preparation for his magnificent weapon to fire once more. Technicians and officers were hard at work. Seen on the window behind him the sun they had chosen as their next source of power was slowly draining.

This had been his plan, the superweapon, a child of his ambition and genius.

With a smirk on his lips, he looked out the window. Those blasted knights could say whatever they wanted, they could be feared by everyone in the Order with their magics, but even with all their powers none of them had the kind of power he had at the moment. The power to destroy entire systems, all he had to do was give the command. No one, absolutely no one had that kind of power and that excited him.

"Weapon charged in fifteen minutes, sir," one of the technicians answered.

Hux tilted his head back and placed his hands behind his back. After today, the Resistance will be nothing more than a mere memory.

~K~

After a long trudge through the snow and climbing the flooding tunnels, they were finally inside. He's never been one to let his fears control him, or even pay any attention to them but inside the windowless corridor, Kylo felt somewhat claustrophobic. He knew about Star Killer base, he was a member of the Knights of Ren when it was still being built. He never had the chance to see it with his own two eyes, but now here he was.

Leading the way, Finn led them to an elevator that took them out of maintenance and into the control levels, where he suspected there'll be thousands of stormtroopers patrolling. Preparing himself, Kylo took out his blaster, ready for anything.

"Hey!"

Raising his blaster he was the one to shoot the stormtrooper that had been waiting for the elevator. As Chewbacca dragged the body out of sight, Han, Kylo and Finn peered warily around the corridor's first corner.

"The longer we're here, the less luck we're going to have. The shields?" Han asked with a grumble, clearly still angry at Finn.

"I have an idea about that" Finn started off, Han, Kylo and Chewbacca following.

Suddenly, Fin stopped and the rest looked over his shoulder. Spotting a figure coming toward them, Finn's eyes grew wide. It was a stormtrooper, at least the design of its armour was but it was unlike any other stormtrooper he's ever seen. Its armour wasn't white like the others but silver, not to mention the black cape that hung down the left side.

Looking back at them, Finn smirked and gestured at the strange stormtrooper with his head. He didn't have to say anything, they all knew what he meant.

Preoccupied with other matters, the stormtrooper failed to see the hairy mountain that plowed into her until it was too late. His massive arms wrapped around her, Chewbacca dragged his captive into the narrow corridor where his companions were waiting. As she struggled in the unbreakable grasp, she found herself turned around to confront a blaster pointed directly at her face.

"Remember me?" Finn asked a smirk on his lips.

"FN-2187."

Finn leaned forward, his smile broadening.

"Not anymore. The name's Finn, and I'm in charge. I'm in charge now, Phasma. I'm in charge."

"We don't have time for this," Kylo grumbled.

Finn straightened a little, re-gathering himself. Looking down at the woman known as Phasma, Finn pointed his blaster at her.

"Come with me."

They managed to avoid the few technicians and troopers they encountered by ducking behind walls. Once inside the shield control room, Chewie shoved Phasma forward. Understanding the gist, Phasma sat before the main console but didn't do anything.

"You want me to blast that bucket off your head? Lower the shields." Finn growled.

"You're making a big mistake," Phasma hissed.

His jaws clenching, Kylo pointed his own blaster at her head.

"Do it," he commanded, his voice eerily cold.

She must have known that he, unlike Finn, wasn't joking around because as soon as he threatened her she reluctantly, worked the controls. Eventually, a readout flared, bright enough for everyone to see it clearly.

SHIELDS DISABLE INITIATED

"If this works, we're not going to have a lot of time to find Rey." Finn worried something he too felt.

The longer time passed the more worried he got, not because of being caught, he had long accepted that but due to the absence of Rey's force signature. Someone that strong in the force, in such a closed-off space, he should be able to feel her already and yet he couldn't feel a thing. That means that either he's just a little rusty from closing himself from the force or Rey isn't here at all. He dearly hoped it was the earlier.

"Don't worry kid, we won't leave here without her."

Phasma pressed a few more buttons, and finally, the screen changed.

SHIELDS DISABLED

"You can't be so stupid as to think this will be easy." Phasma said with a bitterness in her voice "My troops will storm this block and kill you all."

Finn shrugged.

"I disagree." Finn looked at Han and gestured at Phasma. "What do we do with her?"

Han pondered a moment. "Is there a garbage chute? Trash compactor?"

Finn nodded, an evil smile forming on his lips. "Yea, there is."

~RN~

Ren stormed through the corridors, his shoulders bent forward, not caring as to who was in his way.

He could feel him, Kylo was near, he-

Ren stopped dead on his tracks when he saw from the corner of his eye, a figure clad in a brown leather jacket, standing out from the usual white armour. He was a few corridors away, but he could see him, the one he's been after all these years.

Ren smiled wickedly under his helmet and followed Kylo and his group.

~L~

In another control center, on D'Qar there was a spontaneous outburst of excitement, followed by a hurried response.

"General, their shields are down!" One of the techs cried out.

"Thank the Maker!" C3-PO cried out.

Standing by the main control panel, a wide smile began to form on Leia's lips. She never once doubted her boys.

"Han did it! Send them in!" She ordered.

Admiral Statura informed a junior officer stationed at another console.

"Give Poe full authorization to attack."

"Black Leader," the officer said to the transmitter that would send out the command. "go to sub-lights. On your call."

~P~

It was the order Poe had been waiting for. For a brief while, he had doubted the order would ever come, nevertheless, he awaited with a party of X-Wings. It wasn't that he doubted Finn or Kylo, much less Han Solo it's just that getting in the most heavily secured, and armed station in the galaxy just sounded impossible to him, and that's him talking. When he did get his confirmation the edge of his lip quirked up. That damn, crazy son of a bitch did it, and to think that Kylo was usually the one to reprimand him for being too reckless. When he got back he was sure to have a drink with the bastard.

Kylo and Finn had done their part, now it was his turn.

"Roger, base," his grip on his control tightened. "Red squad, blue squad, take my lead."

One by one, members of his party acknowledge his orders. He could hear the underlying fear and anxiety in some of them, he's worked with these men and women for a long time after all, but he knew they wouldn't let him down. No matter what happened, he'll always have their back.

Exiting lightspeed, he was a little surprised for a second when he wasn't welcomed by a swarm of TIE fighters. Taking the lack of enemies as an advantage, he sent his X-wing on a downward dip, getting closer to the hexagonal structure that housed the oscillator. His eyes narrowed in concentration. They had to do as much damage before the cavalry arrived.

"Almost in range!" His lips thinned, his eyes zeroed in on his target. He knew his mission, knew how important it was. Failure was not an option. The entire Resistance was depending on him and those following him in. One way or another, Star Killer couldn't just be damaged, temporarily disabled, no, it had to be completely destroyed. That's when he came in. Being the best pilot of the Resistance, there was nobody better at destruction than him.

"Hit the target dead center, as many runs as we can get!

"Approaching target," Snap said as well as other pilots.

As he let lose his X-Wing's blasters and canons, he briefly noted the similar bursts of fire coming from Snap's vessel. The other X-Wing's followed their lead, blasting the damn thing with everything they got

When they finished their first attack on the building that housed the oscillator, Poe looked back at it with a frown. Their attack hadn't even left a dent on the building.

He didn't know how he was gonna do it, but he vowed that when he's through there would be nothing left but black smoke.

~F~

They were getting closer and closer to the Oscillator and yet there haven't been any signs of Rey. He had told himself not to worry, focus on the matters at hand but now he couldn't control himself. Where was Rey?

His worries for Rey quickly left him, and not for the right reasons. Suddenly tensing, the hairs at the back of his neck stood on end, as he felt a frightening presence nearby.

"What's wrong?" Asked Han, prompting Finn and Chewie to stop and turn.

Kylo had stopped moving, he wasn't looking at them but rather at the other side of the corridor. Finn followed his gaze and saw nothing, strangely enough, he did feel the strange presence coming from that direction.

"You three go on ahead," Kylo turned to face them, his expression devoid of any emotions. "Find the oscillator, I'll go find Rey."

Kylo didn't so much as give them the chance to talk it over, or even argue as he turned on the spot and walked the opposite way.

"Boy," Han called, clearly worried but Kylo didn't turn. All three of them kept staring at Kylo's back as he rounded a corner and banished.

"We should follow him." Before Finn could take his first step, Han gripped his jacket.

"No," Han said, shaking his head. Finn looked at him incredulously.

"What'd you mean no?"

Chewie moaned, seeming to agree with Finn on this one. Still, Han was not deterred from his decision to not follow his son.

"I mean no." Han gestured to where Kylo had gone. "I've seen Luke get like that before when something concerning the force happened." Han shook his head. "When he got like that there was no stopping him. No, we have to keep going."

Finn turned to look at the spot Kylo had disappeared then back at Han. He was worried, the plan was to stick together, now Kylo's left them, normal guys with no special powers, alone. Unfortunately, he doesn't have the time to worry, the only thing he could do was hope that Kylo will find Rey.

"If that's your call." Finn turned and continued to lead them through the base. The more space they put themselves from Kylo, the more worried he got. Back on the Falcon, he had told Kylo that he might as well be in the First Order seeing as he's just as cruel as them, only to realize that he was wrong and now he just felt guilty. He hoped Kylo would come back in one piece, with Rey by his side or he's seriously going to regret ever saying that.

Leaning his head back, Finn asked.

"Did Luke ever get hurt when he, you know, left like that, Solo?" Finn asked when there wasn't an answer Finn frowned "Solo?" He asked again, thinking that perhaps Han hadn't heard him. When there wasn't an answer once again, Fin stopped and turned to look at Han only to come across an empty spot.

"Where the kriff did Solo go?"

Equally shocked, the Wookiee growled and looked around the corridor, as if Han were hiding somewhere. Finn however, knew he must have left them a while back no doubt to go after his son.

"First he tells us not to follow him, and then he just disappears. Just Great!" Finn waved his arms. "What are we even supposed to do?"

Chewie groaned his answer which was for naught, Finn couldn't understand a word he said.

"We're so screwed."

~K~

Kylo was walking through a section of the base that had a large open space with a big hole in the middle, he figured it must be the oscillator room. Looking around, he didn't really know where he was going all he knew is that he was following the familiar force signature.

He knew Ren was here, knew it from the moment they had landed on the planet. He wasn't shocked, he knew he would encounter Ren which is why he had to go his own way. He didn't much care about the others but he still rather keep them out of harm's way. They were much safer away from him. The lie he told them was one he knew they'd buy, especially Finn. What Finn didn't know was that Rey wasn't on the base, or on the planet, he certain of that now. No one could hide their force signature like that. It angered him that, once again, he was sticking his head out for nothing.

Shaking his head, he concentrated on the problem at hand. Last time he had seen Ren, he had cut off his arm and fled the First Order. There wasn't a doubt in his being that Ren wanted him dead, so much so that he would probably chase him to the ends of the galaxy.

Knowing that the best course of action was to kill him, Kylo walked down a set of stairs, keeping to the walls so that no one could see him.

"KYLO!"

Freezing on the spot, the hairs at the back of his neck standing on end, Kylo looked towards the direction where the shout had come from. Before he saw him, he knew exactly who that voice belonged to.

Sticking his head around the wall he was hiding, he looked at the open space and his eyes widened. Standing on a long walkway that spanned a vast open space wasn't just Ren, wearing his iconic helmet but also Han, being held hostage by Ren.

"I know you're out there Kylo!" Ren shouted, his metallic voice vibrating across the large space. "I got daddy here with me. If you don't come out I'm sure I can come up with a few imaginative ways to keep us both entertained."

Gritting his teeth, Kylo glared at Ren with incredible intensity. Han had nothing to do with this, Ren had no right in dragging him into this, that's why he was feeling such anger. That's what he kept telling himself anyways. Inside him though, he felt a pang of worry hit him as soon as he saw Ren holding Han by the throat.

"Wanna know how I caught him?" Han tried to get out of Ren's tight grasp but Rensimply shook him back into place, his grip on his neck tightening. "He saw me following you and tried to stop me."

Kylo frowned and looked at his father who's brows were knit together tightly, not giving up on trying to get out of Ren's hold. For a second Kylo couldn't help but get angry at his father, why would he do something so foolish? He must know who Ren is? Why would he try to fight him?

Ren chuckled, the modulator in the helmet making it sound like a raspy growl rather than a chuckle.

"Foolish old man, my father used to be just like him." Han struggled to get out of Ren's hold once more but once again, to no avail. Ren's arm tightening its hold on Han's neck, making Han gasp for air. "What are you waiting for, kid? Show yourself or I really will kill him."

Seeing Han's face turn redder and redder by the second, gasping for air that wouldn't enter his lungs, Kylo's nose flared. He had no other choice.

Exiting his hiding spot he walked towards the walkway. His eyes were on Ren's silver helmet, not once looking at his father. He wasn't going to lie to himself, he worried for Han but he was going to face his old teacher, he had to maintain a levelled head.

Stopping a few feet away from him, Kylo didn't have to see his face to know Ren was smiling triumphantly under that helmet.

~L~

As Leia watched the monitor, watching the fight between X-Wings and TIE fighters, she couldn't help but get increasingly more worried by the minutes. Where on earth was Han and Ben? Their mission was to disable the shields and get the hell out of there. They should be aboard the Falcon by now, and yet-

Feeling a sense of foreboding overcome her, Leia's lips thinned. She had a bad feeling about this.

A loud beep came from one of the controls monitored by one of the techs. Simultaneously everyone turned to look at another smaller screen, one that showed thousands of TIE fighters descending onto the wintery planet.

Once more, dread overcame her.

"We weren't prepared for anything like this," Admiral Statura muttered. "Our pilots will be annihilated."

One by one, each X-Wing was swarmed by TIE fighters and yet all she could think of was where was Ben and Han?

~F~

Finn grabbed detonators after detonator from Chewie's duffle bag, putting them all around the chamber. The Wookiee, who's this idea belonged to, was also busy placing explosives. Finn was pouting, less than happy to be doing this, he had wanted to go find Rey, that's the whole point of taking this mission. But when he tried to so much as take one step towards the corner that Kylo had disappeared from, the large furry carpet would grab him and haul him away, growling. He wasn't up for pissing off a Wookiee so he, grudgingly, followed Chewie and did what he gestured for him to do.

He wondered how Rey was doing. If she was alright. This is a big battle station, finding her could take hours, hours that she could be spending getting tortured not to mention that they simply don't have that kind of time.

Letting out a loud huff from frustration, Finn put down one of the detonators and shook his head. What was he doing here?

A loud roar from Chewie had Finn jerking on the spot.

"Alright, alright, I'm on it!"

Finn grabbed the detonator and continued to place them all around the chamber when a loud shout stopped him.

"KYLO!"

~K~

"Lo and behold, the prodigal son returns," Ren mocked, softening his grip on Han's neck. Lurching his head forward, while still being held by Ren, Han took in large gulps of air, glaring at Ren as he did.

"Yo-you leave my son alone-" Han took in another deep breath. "Bastard!"

Kylo did his best to keep his eyes on Ren, trying not to show any emotions. If Ren finds out that Han matter to him, even in the slightest, he'll use him against him. But if he saw that Kylo didn't then he might lose interest in his father. That's what he hoped. Ren has always been radical, unpredictable, he didn't know what he might do next.

"Your son?" Mock dripped from Ren's voice. Gesturing with his head, Ren continued. "Let's see if you see him as your son when you hear the kind of atrocities he's committed."

Kylo's breath caught, his brows knit together and for a brief second of weakness, he couldn't help himself from glancing down at his father. In Ren's hold, Han tensed and stopped struggling, his eyes looking straight at his son's.

Once again, Ren made that hissing sound of a chuckle.

"Oh yes, your boy here's done terrible things, I'm actually surprised he's kept it a secret this long." Kylo's sweatdropped, his lips set in a grim line."Kylo, that's his name now, do you know why?"

Ren tilted his head to one side, and Kylo knew he was enjoying this, not to mention that he must know by now that he isn't as callous towards his father as he himself had hope. "Cause whenever someone joins the knights of Ren they leave behind their past, including their names and are reborn." Ren used his free, flesh hand, to point at Kylo. "You see kiddo here, he's Kylo Ren one of my knights, or was... but I'm sure we can fix that."

The large space fell silent, the only thing that could be heard was the loud howling of the wind coming from the outside. For the second time since walking onto the walkway, Kylo couldn't help himself but look at his father. Han's eyes were wide in shock, his body unmoving. For the first time, Kylo felt shame wash over him.

Ren laughed, this was obviously exactly the kind of reaction he had hoped for.

"He didn't run away when the temple was destroyed, he destroyed it himself and killed everyone in it. Of course, he had some help."

This time, Kylo didn't look away from his father as Ren spoke. He never wanted his father or anyone finding out the truth, not this way. He hadn't wanted to admit why but he could no longer keep the truth from himself. He thought Ben Solo had died and yet a small part of him still cared how his parents see him, a part of him didn't want them to know the things he's done. Deep inside him was the boy that never wanted to disappoint his parents.

Kylo's brows softened, his jaws clenched as he looked at his father with guilt.

Once again, Ren laughed.

"He isn't your son, your son died in that burning temple." Kylo looked up from his father and then to Ren. "Once you join the Knights of Ren you never leave it. He knew that, and he still knows that. He is not Ben Solo anymore!"

Everything fell silent.

Feeling like he weighed a ton, Kylo prepared himself to hear his father voice his disappointment. However, when that never came he looked down at Han and was confused. In his father's face, there wasn't disgust or even disappointment, instead, his eyes glinted as he looked at him, understanding and sadness behind them.

"You think that changes anything?" Han rasped, his throat sore from being choked. "Doesn't matter what he does, he'll always be my son."

Kylo's brows lifted slightly in surprise, never having expected Han to say that.

Ren chuckled but there was no amusement behind it, instead, Kylo could detect how disappointed and annoyed he was at the turn of events.

"Whatever you say, old man, don't stop the fact that the road ends here, for both of you." hearing the familiar hum of energy of a lightsaber, Kylo froze and snapped his eyes up to Ren who was holding his lightsaber to Han's neck. "Unless you put down your lightsaber and kneel."

His brows knit together, his eyes flashed with anger, hands balling up into fists.

"Everything can be forgiven, I'll take you back to the order, I'll even let daddy here go."

Kylo's nose flared, his jaws clenched.

"He's got nothing to do with this!"

Ren took in a sharp breath, his hold on his lightsaber tightening.

"He's got everything to do with this!" Ren shouted, and moved his lightsaber closer. Han grimaced in pain as the heat oozing from the sabre burned him.

Instinctually, and from rage, Kylo took out his lightsaber but didn't ignite it, instead, he kept glaring at Ren.

"You told us how he abandoned you, how they all abandoned you. So how does this have nothing to do with him, when this all started with him?" Kylo's grip on his lightsaber tightened, wondering how fast he could kill Ren. "Still, you care for him so I'll be nice and let him go… but you gotta kneel kid."

For a second he thought he might break his lightsaber in half from how hard he was holding it.

"Don't listen to him, Ben! He's lying!"

Kylo looked at his father for a second, worry clear in his eyes. Ren growled and tightened his grip on Han's neck so that he couldn't speak again.

"Am I boy? Am I lying? Are you willing to risk it and let dad here die?"

Kylo grit his teeth. He wanted nothing more than to run Ren through with his lightsaber but if he did that then his father is as good as dead. It made him feel useless, made him feel weak but even he wasn't fast enough to save Han.

All his life, he's fought his way through everything, always choosing the path with the most resistance, it's just who he is but at that very moment, he found himself unable to do just that. Han Solo may be many things but despite everything he's done he still doesn't want him to die even if his survival meant becoming Kylo Ren.

Giving his lightsaber one last tight grip, he sighed and threw it at Ren's feet. Unable to look up from shame, he fell to his knees the sound of the contact he made with the metal rebounding from all over the space. Letting out a deep breath, Kylo lowered his head, defeated.

The walkway rumble as Ren laughed triumphantly.

"Ah, there he is, the rebellious knight that tries to pretend he's someone else." Kylo didn't even have the will to be angry at Ren, he simply continued to stare at the metal floor. He thought that maybe his old teacher was right, maybe this is who he was always meant to be. A slave of the dark.

"We both know you're just a tool Kylo, always have been always will be. You're a servant to fate, you lived your entire life on your knees…" Kylo closed his eyes, accepting the truth in those words. "And now you'll witness your father's death on them!"

Everything happened so fast. Before Kylo could so much as understand, or process what Ren said. Ren took his lightsaber away from Han's neck, only to plunge it deep through his chest. When Kylo finally did look up all he saw was the lightsaber protruding out of his father's chest, his mouth falling open from shock and pain as he looked at his son.

Without any remorse, Ren pushed Han Solo, the legendary pilot, off his lightsaber and onto the empty, dark space.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woooow, another update so soon! and it's a cliff hanger? I bet you weren't expecting this! Before I spoil anything, I'm gonna stop writing and let you guys ponder a bit on things.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading, please comment and see you next time!


	17. Chapter 17

_~R~_

Her wrists shackled, Rey was half dragged, half pushed on the planet they just landed. She had no idea where she was but it somewhat reminded her of Jakku, a very dark eerie version of the desert with its flat and empty plains, and was hazy and hot and dry air. Surrounding her from all sides were the Knights of Ren with Trudgen being the one to lead the way. She was treated like a war criminal but as to what crime she had committed, she had no clue.

Looking down at her wrists, she noticed the burn caused by the friction from the shackles. Still, it wasn't the worst injury she had. Her lips were swollen, with a deep cut right in the middle of them. Her right eye was pitch black from a bruise, it's eyelids unable to part open. Various other bruises decorated her face and body, one worse than the next. Her once creamy coloured dress had splatters of blood on it, as well as various rips and tears. She didn't look so well, in fact, she had never felt this horrible in her life. Not when she had to fight other scavengers, not when some men thought she was an easy target and tried to take advantage of her, not when she had gone days without food. This personal hell of hers was unlike anything she'd experienced before, and yet she refused to let it break her.

Trudgen had been the one to administer each injury with the use of various tools she had seen on the darkest areas of fallen star destroyers on Jakku. Such tools scared her beyond compare when she had come upon them as a scavenger. Her fingertips tracing them as she imagined what kind of sick torture they must have inflicted in the past, never once imagining that she would fall victim to them in the future.

She winced when a loud thunder crack made her head pound in pain from her already terrible migraine.

Keeping to what that monster, Ren had said, Trudgen didn't dare invade her mind, something she was grateful for. While he could methodologically cause her pain hour after hour after hour, her mind was still free, still her own little place to retreat to when the pain got too bad. It has only been a little over a day since she's been captured. She didn't know if anyone would come and save her, she doubted it so, for now, she will only trust in herself to get out of this situation. She was determined to take whatever they throw at her, they can do whatever they want to do to her, but so long as her mind is her own she can get out of this. She's long used to physical pain.

With her mind deep in thought, she didn't notice herself slowing down. When her back bumped against the knight walking behind her, he pushed her almost causing her to fall.

"Keep up," he grumbled.

With all the mist, the planet didn't afford much visibility. Because of that, she didn't see the citadel until they were almost upon it. She could barely see it, only being visible when lightning struck. it hovered over the barren surface, a large structure made of stone towering high enough that its peak was nearly lost in haze.

Bending her neck, she looked up at the structure in both awe and fear. She could feel something...something that made her skin crawl, something that made her want to hide in the deepest crevice, something familiar. Feeling anger and curiosity rise inside her, she glared at the citadel. She didn't know why she was feeling a familiarity with this place but she decided that she didn't like it. This place- it doesn't feel right, it rubbed her entirely the wrong way. It was twisted, rotten full of Death, pain and fear, why would she feel any familiarity with it? Worse was that she could feel it beckoning her, welcoming her. It made her skin itchy

Her eyes widened as they got closer, lightning crackled in the gap between ground and structure. For a second she thought they wouldn't fit, but the space was just high enough for them to walk in. Turning her head and looking at the ceiling, she felt as if the very structure was weighing on her.

Their footsteps echoed, the sound rebounding all over the walls. When the knights suddenly stopped, she did too. A gigantic gear moved into place and suddenly the area they stood upon separated itself from the floor, becoming a floating disk that lowered them into the depths of the citadel.

As they descended the more she felt like the walls were closing in on her, that the crushing miasma of death and decay would swallow her whole. Spending most of her life inside star destroyers, one would think she's long used to small spaces and while that is mostly the case, she couldn't help but feel claustrophobic.

Her breathing quickened but she refused to let it progress to panic. The other knights didn't seem to be affected by the unnerving feeling that only got worse and worse the further down they went. In fact, they seemed to relax, almost as if glad they were home.

Keeping her attention on the walls as a distraction from her rising panic, she found herself captivated by the colossal stone faces, all carved in exquisite detail. Looking into the eyes of the face she didn't recognize, something dark moved within her.

The disk-like platform came to a gentle halt in a large space that brought them to a lab? She wasn't quite sure what it was.

Looking up, she noticed that the stone faces were high above them now. Shivering she tore her gaze away from them, feeling like they were looming over her, judging her. Everything was dark, no source of light to guide their way, just the crackle of lightning outside.

Turning on the spot, Trudgen faced her, looking her up and down. She wasn't a violent person, she liked to think of herself as someone that only used violence when needed but at that very moment, she felt the overwhelming need to hurt the knight.

"She's filthy," the large knight noted, making Rey's glare hardened. Looking up and away from her, he looked at another knight, one that was holding a war club. "Take her to one of the chambers to change."

The knight bowed his head and grabbed her arm, his grip tight like a vise when he began to drag her away. Rey refused to move, her eyes on Trudgen.

"I need full range of my hands to change, or do you expect me to change with my hands tied together?"

The grip on the hand holding her tightened but he stopped pulling her as they waited for the other knight to answer.

Trudgen turned to look at her and cocked his head. Rey would be lying if she said she wasn't afraid of him. Spending an entire day being tortured can do that to a person.

Taking a step towards her so he was looming over her, she looked up at him defiantly. After a few seconds of just staring at her, he spoke.

"Ushar," his deep voice sounding louder than it was.

"Sir?" The knight holding her asked.

"When she's in her chamber take her restraints off and let her change," Trudgen straightened his back, his head needing to bend quite a bit to look down at her. She could practically feel the knight's eyes on her, telling her -you-better-not-be-up-to-something. "Do not leave the room, watch her at all times."

She opened her mouth to argue, but before she could the knight known as Ushar, pulled her, nearly causing her to fall. Trudgen and the other didn't wait around, they all quickly went their separate ways while she was dragged away to a dark hallway.

Usually, she has a good sense of directions but inside the dark, creepy citadel she could barely make out which way was up much less where the north was located. It was maddingly disorienting.

Once they made it to her chamber, well they called it a chamber when really it was just another prison, it didn't even have a bed, just a table with a small pile of clothes, the door closed behind Ushar. Feeling sweat slide down her back, Rey looked up at the knight. She didn't like being inside a small room with a man all alone, much less a murderous one while she's in chains. It didn't make her feel better that Trudgen had ordered them all to keep their hands off her. From what she could tell they were very loyal but how far, she did not know and rather not find out.

Characteristically of her, Rey shoved her hands up, looking up at the knight expectantly. Ushar seemed to eye her for a second, no doubt trying to see if she was going to try to do something. When he seemed convinced she wasn't up to something, the knight grabbed her metal restraints, making sure to pull on them so that the metal bites down on her. Rey grimaced a bit.

Pressing a few buttons on the small panel on the restraints, so fast even she couldn't follow his fingers, Ushar gave her one last look before removing them. Rey simply continued to glare at him, not giving anything away. When the knight finally did decide to remove her restraints, Rey waited for the telltale click of the lock to pounce.

Leaning back on one leg, Rey kicked the knight square on the chest. He was larger than her but thankfully she managed to push him back a few steps, clearly not having had expected that. Hitting the wall of the small room, the knight groaned a little dazed. Rey didn't give him a chance to re-gather himself as she lunged at him. Being a well-trained warrior, despite being taken by surprise, Ushar quickly brought his war club up and blocked her.

With the war club between them, Rey grabbed it by the haft and pushed her entire body weight behind it, pushing it towards Ushar's neck. Rey clenched her jaws, baring her teeth. The knight growled as his own club was pushed further and further towards his neck. Despite him being a monster, she didn't want to kill him, she just wanted to choke him until he passed out.

His muscles straining under the pressure of the war club, Rey grit her teeth and pushed as hard as she could. Despite her weakened state she was winning, having the positioning advantage. Ushar had a wall behind him, she didn't, allowing her to put all her weight behind the club. Once the haft of the club made contact with the knight's neck, Ushar growled once more and she couldn't help but feel triumphant. Unfortunately, her victory was short-lived.

Before she could even notice, Ushar lifted his leg and kicked her right in the stomach. Rey stumbled back several steps, falling back on the ground, gasping for air. Barely hearing the knight's footsteps as he made his way towards her, Rey looked up, still gasping for air.

Club wrapped tightly in his hands, Rey thought for a second the knight might disobey orders and kill her right then and there. Taking deep breaths and taking one more step towards her, his club lifting, Rey began to panic. She tried to slide away from the man but he just followed, until she was up against the opposite wall with nowhere to go. Rey's eyes widened as she looked at the knight, her heart hammering, what he did next made her freeze.

Suddenly on his knees, he grabbed her by her ankle and dragged her towards him. Her mind stopped working, fear having gripped it fully. All she could see was that one time a man had tried to force himself on her. Instinctually and out of pure terror, Rey brought her hand up. She didn't know what she was doing, fear and anger fuelling her, she just brought her hand up and the next thing she knew there were strings of lightning leaving her fingertips, wrapping all around the knight.

Ushar spasmed as he was electrocuted, making a low gurgling sound. When Rey's eyes widened and she noticed what she was doing, the lightning ceased. Giving out one last groan, the knight toppled over, his club leaving his hand.

Sitting right against the wall with her arms wrapped tightly around her knees, Rey gasped for air, her heart pounding. She was looking down at the knight, shocked. Was that, did she just w-

Rey shook her head, some of her senses coming back to her. She didn't have the luxury to stop and think. She took down the knight, now she needed to make a run for it. Standing back up she looked down at Ushar. His chest was rising up and down, so he wasn't dead, just unconscious. She was neither glad nor disappointed about that, she just hastily grabbed the war club and looked at the door. She knew there must be someone guarding from the outside, one of the knights no doubt. The reason why they couldn't hear what just happened is probably because the room is soundproof, perfect for torturing someone.

While she was lucky of having taken down one knight she didn't want to test her luck. Looking around the room she tried to find anyways out other than the door. For a second she was going to give up when she didn't find anything until her eyes landed on a covered vent on the ceiling.

She smiled triumphantly. It may be an evil lair, but even evil lairs needed vents.

Standing below it Rey raised the large, far too heavy for her, club and began to smash the little vent to pieces. Letting the vent drop to the floor, Rey used the table to reach it and easily pushed herself up and into it, leaving the room behind.

_~T~_

While Ren was away, Trudgen was in charge, a duty he soon hopes will become permanent. Either through death in battle, or by his own hand, Ren was nearing the end of his life. He trusted their leader, learned much from him and has been by his side through the toughest missions, even shared the pain of being disciplined by their master. The point is, there isn't anyone more loyal to Ren than he, which gave him the right to be one to kill him and become The Ren. It was nothing personal, it's just their way, a practice adopted from the siths of old. For now, however, he was happy with being second in command and did his best to impress his fellow knights and master whenever he took up the mantle of Ren, though temporary. He was so convinced that he was fit to lead, fit to do their masters bidding that when things like this happened he found it incredibly difficult to not kill someone.

"What do you mean the girl escaped?" Trudgen hissed his voice eerily soft and icy cold.

Having their faces hidden behind helmets, it was sometimes difficult to tell their reactions or emotions, but with how much Ushar tensed he knew he was nervous.

"She escaped her restraints, sir." On his last nerves, Trudgen glared at the other knight behind his helmet. Ushar didn't need to see his expression to know that he was on a dangerous situation. "She's stronger than she seems, while I wasn't looking she overpowered me and knocked me out."

Trying to keep himself composed before he killed Ushar, Trudgen took a deep breath. He should have known something like this would happen, that the girl is much stronger than she seems. He thought he had broken most of her spirits on their way to Exegol but it seems that he was wrong, and now his mistake could cost him being disciplined by their master.

Tensing, fear gripped him. Death was a more preferable punishment. No, he had to find the girl and fast.

He opened his mouth to speak but then something caught his attention, and his eyes narrowed, zeroed in on Ushar's empty hand.

Pointing to his empty hand, Trudgen looked at his fellow knight. "What happened to your weapon?"

Shifting from one leg to the other, it took the other knight a few seconds to gather enough courage to answer.

"The girl took it, sir," Ushar said softly, fear dripping down his voice, his eyes looking down at the ground.

silence dominated the group, all knights eyes fixed on their disgraced member. The already stuffy air seemed to get stuffier as Trudgen's grip on his sword tightened.

"Ushar…" Trudgen's muscles loosened. A sharp intake of air was all that could be heard before Trudgen, with uncharacteristic speed, raised his sword and decapitated the knights head clean off.

No one said a word, no one so much as flinched as their friend, their brother was killed where he stood. None of them dared to question Trudgen, not because of fear but because they all knew the rule. Almost all transgressions can be forgiven, but losing your weapons is punishable by death. Truthfully, Trudgen thought Ushar got off easy. Torture would have been far worse.

Lowering his sword and walking towards their fallen member's head, he, without any remorse or weakness grabbed the, still helmeted, head and threw it at Ap'lek, blood dripping from the severed head.

"You know our ways," Trudgen said. "Burn the body but keep the helmet, our brother might join us yet again."

Of course, he didn't mean the one he'd just killed, he was as dead as bantha fodder. No, what he meant is the next person that will bear the title of Ushar Ren. He had no doubt that they'll find someone eventually, but he really hoped that the next Ushar Ren won't be as useless as his predecessor.

Turning to face the other knights, Trudgen rested his sword on his shoulder.

"As for the rest of you, we got a girl to find."

_~R~_

A loud bang came from the outside, followed by the crackle of lightning. Rey jumped a little, her hands holding onto the war club tightly. She didn't have a clue as to where she was going. She was trying to find a place that would remotely look like a ship hangar, but to no avail. Everything was dark, too dark for her to see properly. She tried to retrace her steps, trying to go back to the entrance and try to get on the ship she had arrived in but even that she couldn't do. The halls and rooms were built in a series of mazes, impossible for those who weren't familiar with it to find their way around them. What's worse, she could feel people watching her, even swore she had seen something moving from the corner of her eye.

Another flash of lightning illuminated the hallway, her heart pumping inside her chest.

What if she never found the exit? What if she couldn't get out? The knights of Ren are mercenaries, at least they used to be before joining the knights, that's what Trudgen had told her. That being said, it'll be easy for them to find her eventually. This time she doubted they'll be as merciful.

Walking inside a large chamber, a flash of lightning illuminated a huge glass tank, containing three creatures. Rey looked at them, horrified by their appearance. They were all the same creature, she realized with a start, with wrinkled skin and an oversized bald head and features caught in a state of everlasting anguish. When something moved in her peripheral vision, she jerked her head, the war club raising. She knew she was not alone. Figures moved in the shadows. She slowed, looking at the occupants with uncertainty. Some of them stopped what they were doing to look at her but they didn't raise the alarm or do anything, they just looked away and continued about their work. They wore black, robes, and bandages shrouded their faces.

She shuddered and kept walking when she heard a familiar voice that made her freeze.

"She's close," Trudgen said, his voice far but still too close for comfort.

As another flash of lightning illuminated the space, Rey lunged herself behind a crate, the war club held tightly against her chest. Her heart was pounding, she took a deep breath to calm herself and poked her head over the crate.

Trudgen was looking around the chamber, the creepy black robbed occupants didn't so much as acknowledge his presence. Rey sighed, relieved. She thought they would give her away but clearly the cloaked figures were far too busy to care.

When Trudgen went the other way to look for her, Rey jumped at the opportunity and went the opposite way. Halfway between standing up, Rey suddenly stopped her eyes widening.

Without warning, a needle-like pain stabbed her head with such intensity that she toppled onto her hands and knees. Her first reaction was to gasp. Eyes watering, her teeth gnashing she gripped her head tightly with both hands. Confusion, pain, and fear gripped her. Where was the pain coming from? It wasn't from an outside source, she didn't feel like her body was in pain, just her head, as if it was being split in two. She had never felt anything like that, and if the pain ever goes away she hopes to never feel it again. It was the worst thing she had ever felt in her life, worse than any tortured she had suffered under Trudgen, worse than the days-long starvation on Jakku.

Rolling tightly into a little ball, she felt something… a soothing presence brushing up against her in equal pain. It was almost as if the presence shared in her pain but just as she tried to seek it, the presence would slip further and further away from her. For a second she was tempted to scream for it to come back, to help her but nothing came.

Opening her mouth to scream but nothing came out in her anguish; she vaguely noticed the footsteps coming her way. With incredible effort, she looked up. Trudgen was standing before her, his sword by his side. Any other time she would have been terrified, angry that he had found her but at that moment she couldn't so much as care. All she knew is that she wanted the pain to go away, that she would do anything to make the pain go away.

Tilting his head Trudgen's grip on his sword tightened. Before Rey knew it, he brought his sword up and hit the side of her head with the pommel.

Before everything went black she caught a glimpse of a set of cruel, yellow eyes watching her behind Trudgen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a few things to address here...
> 
> Why doesn't Rey react when she uses force lightning? Well, she's still pretty ignorant of the force, she doesn't yet know it's an ability only the emperor could use… and count Dooku but let's not go there. Also, she's in a flight or fight situation. She knows she needs to get out and fast or she might get killed, she doesn't have time to stop and feel sorry for herself.
> 
> Now, a fun fact. I like to leave hints and foreshadowing in my writing, there's honestly so many already but there's one I will point out. When the platform that takes Rey to the citadel lowers, she feels claustrophobic. Last chapter Kylo noticed that he felt weirdly claustrophobic when going inside Star Killer. Now, I doubt Kylo would ever feel claustrophobic, that's just the type of character he is, so what he's feeling there is actually from Rey. I don't know if anyone noticed that, so I had to point it out.
> 
> Another fun fact you may not know about the movies is that, when Kylo looked inside Rey's head, he transferred, unknowingly, some of his knowledge about the force to her. In normal circumstances this wouldn't be the case, otherwise, Poe would also know about the force (though he wouldn't be able to use it because he's not force sensitive) but seeing as Rey and Kylo are a dyad then it makes sense. This being said, this is the reason why Rey is so advanced in her Jedi training from the get-go.
> 
> Now, back to business. I got quite a lot of free time now so I've decided to update every Sunday. Hopefully, I can keep that up, but yea you can expect a new chapter every Sunday.
> 
> So thank you so much for commenting! you know who you are, those that comment every chapter without fail, as well as the occasional people that comment and the new readers! I love hearing back from you!
> 
> So thank you for reading, please comment and see you next Sunday.


	18. Chapter 18

~P~ 

"We should pull back Black leader, the metal's too thick for our canons, we aren' doing any damage."

Gritting his teeth, Poe banked left and rolled his X-wing when a group of TIE fighters began to shoot at him.

"I agree Black leader, we just don't have the firepower to take down that building."

His grip on the control tightened. He pressed two buttons and pulled back on the centre stick with as much force as he could. His X-wing head tilted up until the whole ship was completely vertical. Heart pumping, Poe moved the centre stick downward sending his ship flying backwards. Before the TIE fighter could even notice, Poe's X-wing was now behind them. Without any hesitation, he fired the cannons and blasted the TIE fighters to pieces.

Turning his head, he noticed that others weren't as lucky. Far in the distance, another X-wing was swarmed by a group of TIE fighters and blown to pieces.

"We can't take anymore, I'm calling off the at-"

"No!" Poe yelled into his comm. "My friends are down there, and besides," Poe glared at the building. "This is our only chance."

The comm line went quiet. For a second he feared they might disobey orders and leave, he wouldn't blame them if they did.

"Roger that Black leader," Paige said and continued her attack, all other X-wings followed.

Poe sighed, relieved.

~L~ 

Leia was close to ordering the stubborn pilot to retreat herself when a feeling of pain and loss overcame her.

Gasping, Leia sat back on her seat and stared at her hands, tears threatening to fall.

"Han."

~F~

Finn stood by the railing of the platform he was on, shocked at what had transpired in the walkway of the oscillator.

Kylo- Kylo was a knight of Ren? How could that be, he- and now Han was dead, how-

Stopping his train of thought, Chewbacca roared with such fury that felt the metal floor under him tremble. Raising his bowcaster, the Wookiee fired at Ren straight in the head. However, Ren wasn't caught by surprise he simply blocked the blast with his lightsaber without so much as looking at them.

Frustrated and his mind clouded by anger Chewie took out the remote detonator but before he could press it Finn grabbed his arm. The Wookiee turned and growled at him with such ferocity that Finn nearly took a step back.

"Kylo's still down there Chewie, if you detonate the explosives he'll die!"

Chewie growled and pushed him off him but thankfully he listened and stayed his hand, looking worriedly at Kylo.

Finn opened his mouth but then noticed the group of stormtroopers making their way to where they were, blasters raised.

"Shit."

~RN~

Taking his helmet off, Ren smiled wickedly at Kylo's broken figure, still on his knees, his eyes on the floor.

"Don't worry, you won't live long enough to mourn him," Ren hissed, grabbing Kylo's lightsaber that was still near his feet. Ren rolled the lightsaber, getting a feel for it before igniting it, now holding two lightsabers. His own, and Kylo's crossguard. Despite holding his own weapon and making his way towards him, Kylo never looked up.

Ren loomed over Kylo, a victorious smirk on his lips.

"And to think my master had such high hopes for you."

Raising Kylo's own lightsaber, Ren prepared to kill yet another member of the Solo family.

"You had spirit kid, I'll give you that." And with that, the lightsaber came down.

Before the lightsaber could make its descent, the walkway began to tremble, causing Ren to lose his footing for a second. Around the chamber, the metal panels that covered the walls began to shake and tear from the walls like flimsy tin foil. The walkway swayed as if it were made from ropes and wood rather than sturdy metal supported by thick beams. Ren looked around the chamber confused, for a second he thought they were being attacked but when he saw no one with them, he came to the eerie realization that it was the boy who was causing all of this.

Looking back at the defeated figure of his old student, Ren frowned, sweat rolling down his back. Was the kid really doing this? When he saw the veins standing out on Kylo's neck from exertion, he got his answer. Horrified, Ren hastily brought the crossguard lightsaber up to end the kid before he killed them both.

Ren swung the lightsaber downwards, sure that he wouldn't be stopped this time. Much like last time, the lightsaber never made contact with its master because as soon as Ren swung the lightsaber downwards a sharp metal panel from the wall came flying towards him, cutting his hand clean off.

~K~

Ren roared from pain, Kylo's lightsaber falling to the dark abyss where his father had disappeared into. However, before it could get too far it stopped it's descent and went the opposite way instead.

Finally standing up on his feet, Kylo held out his hand as the lightsaber fit itself snugly against the palm of his hand.

There was no guilt, sadness, no reason, all there was rage. Eyes burning with hatred, he looked at Ren. The knight, taking several steps back to put space between them, gritted his teeth from pain, blood gushing out of his wound. Raising his lightsaber, Ren pressed it against the stump where his hand once was, cauterizing the wound. Roaring from pain, Ren glared at him.

Ren shook his head, his eyes wide with insanity.

"I'm going to kill you boy, I really am."

Kylo didn't respond, didn't even realize that Ren had said anything, all he did notice was that Ren was in front of him in a battle-ready stance.

Raising his lightsaber, he ran to where his enemy was standing, years of training taking over. Ren, putting his pain aside also raised his lightsaber and raced towards Kylo. When the beams of their lightsabers crossed, the resulting burst of energy lit the entire space.

To an observer at a distance, it would have appeared as if a series of small explosions were going off in the oscillator chamber. Blow after blow landed as lightsaber struck against lightsaber. Being bigger and stronger than Ren, Kylo's blows kept him on the defensive, forcing him to step back. For a brief moment, Ren didn't notice his footing and stumbled a little but enough to give Kylo the advantage. Swinging his crossguard lightsaber at the knight's head, Ren's eyes widened and managed to bring his lightsaber to block it. But with only one hand he wasn't able to block the punch to the face. A loud crunch sound resonated through the chamber, blood spilling out of Ren's broken nose, but it didn't seem to make him hesitate, in fact it only proved to make him angrier.

Giving out a roar of anger, Ren raised his lightsaber and sent blow after blow at Kylo, who waited for his moment to turn the tables. For a while, the fight continued to shift back and forth. First Kylo gained the advantage, then an enraged Ren took it back, neither men willing to surrender. Still, using just one hand was proving to be much of a challenge for Ren but he did not show any signs of exhaustion.

When their lightsabers connected once more, Ren met Kylo's blazing eyes, a shiver ran down his spine as a fleeting moment of fear overtook him. Kylo, on the other hand, neither cared nor relish in his old mentor's weakness. With both of his hands on his lightsaber, Kylo easily pushed his opponent's blade back with sheer force. What he did not expect was for Ren to suddenly pull their blades apart and use the momentum to sidekick him right in the chest.

Air leaving his lungs, Kylo gasped as air completely left his lungs, leaving himself open. With an insane look in his face, Ren angled his lightsaber and swung it downwards at Kylo's face.

Taking a painful blow to the head and chest, Kylo took several steps back, a prominent burn slashed across his face. He registered the pain, a pain he had never felt before and yet he refused to let it control him.

His slashed eye closed as blood ran down his face, he swung his lightsaber, familiar crackling sound reassuring him. Still in front of him was Ren, taking deep large breaths as he took the opportunity to regain some of his breath back.

Ren was glaring at him, a cocky smirk on his lips as he laughed. "You could have been a powerful knight if you had stayed."

Kylo didn't respond, nor was he going to give Ren the chance to regain his breath. Taking a step towards him, Ren's smirk grew as he held up his lightsaber, not at him, but towards the abyss below them.

"you remember the modifications I made to my lightsaber right?" Kylo stopped, dead in his tracks. "If I let go of it, it'll explode, taking us both down with it!"

Lowering his lightsaber, Kylo took a deep breath to calm himself and focused. Mistaking his action for hesitation, Ren chuckled with triumph.

"Now, you're gonna turn around and let me go or I will-"

Before he could finish, Kylo swung his arms back and threw his lightsaber at an unnatural speed. Staying true to its course, the blade cut Ren's other hand clean off with his lightsaber still in its grasp. It took Ren a while to realize what had happened as he looked to where his lightsaber had disappeared, expecting an explosion but nothing came. It had been a gamble, but it was the only choice he had. By throwing his lightsaber at just the right speed and angle he managed to cut Ren's robotic hand so cleanly, that the nerves and cabling remained intact, it's grip still on the lightsaber even when it was disconnected from Ren's body.

Kylo raised his hand and grabbed his returning lightsaber. Taking several steps back, Ren looked at Kylo, fear shining in his eyes as he made his way towards him. Not noticing a small dent on the floor, Ren fell on his back but he still tried to crawl away from Kylo. Any other man would have felt sorry, but all he felt was satisfaction as the worm tried to get away from him.

Pressing his foot on Ren's chest with so much force that he heard the loud snaps of his ribs breaking. Ren howled in pain, his eyes closing.

"Damn it!" Ren growled, wriggling under Kylo's got.

If circumstances had been different he would have made Ren suffer more, but a small part of him told him he didn't have much time. Cutting his fun short, Kylo raised his hand and Ren's eyes opened, resignation clear in them.

"Go on then, do it, kill me," Ren hissed, his eyes fixed on Kylo's hand. "I won either way." Ren chocked on his own blood as he laughed. "You won't ever find the girl and if by some chance you do, she'll never be the same."

Out of all the things Ren could have said, that one made Kylo freeze. Anger for his father's death was quickly accompanied by Rey's kidnapping, imagining what the knights will do to her.

Kylo's eyes narrowed to crinkled slits and brought his foot up, which Ren mistook it for him letting go but instead, Kylo brought the foot down with even more force than before.

Ren screamed, coughing uncontrollably as he choked on his own blood.

"What did you do to her?" his voice was eerily soft, nothing like the maelstrom of emotions he was feeling.

Instead of looking at him with fear, Ren seemed to find the humour in the situation as he chuckled.

"Me? Nothing. It's what the people that have her that will make her wish she'd never met you and left that dump she calls home."

Kylo's eyes widened, his hands began to tremble from anger. Lifting his foot off of the knight, Kylo knelt down and grabbed Ren by his neck

"Where is she?"

Ren laughed and shook his head. Nose flaring, Kylo pressed down on Ren's neck, cutting the air on his already collapsing lungs.

"WHERE IS SHE!" he yelled, the metal walkway shook from under him, his grip on Ren's neck tightening.

This time Ren looked up at him in fear, all amusement gone.

"You think I'd tell you?" Ren asked, choking on his blood. "Unli-unlike you I -I would never betray my master, d- do you have any idea wh- what he would do to me?"

Kylo growled,

"If you don't tell me I'll kill you just the same!" Kylo hissed, his grip on his lightsaber tightening.

Amusement returning at full force, Ren laughed.

"I don't f-fear death, and you-" Ren smirked. "You are just a boy."

Kylo gritted his teeth and let Ren go and stood up, looking down at the pitiful man.

"It doesn't matter, I'll find her and when I do I'll kill Snoke too."

A moment of silence passed between them as Ren looked at him as if he'd gone insane only for his lips to broaden into a large smile.

"Sn-Snoke?" Ren shook his head. "Oh, kid, just kill me already."

Leaning his head forward, Ren took a deep breath, amusement leaving him as anger dominated his expression once more. The knight groaned, sat up a little and spat at Kylo's foot. Looking up at him, Ren sneered.

"You ain't got the guts, do you? You Jedi are all the same, weak! Pathetic, a-"

Ren suddenly stopped before he could say another word as his lips parted and his body began to tremble. By an invisible force, Ren's body was pushed down against the metal floor with such force that his bones began to crack one by one. Before him, Kylo's hand was up as he pushed the knight down with the force.

"I'm no Jedi."

Ren's eyes widened with fear, his lips trembling as he looked at Kylo's hand slowly ball up into a fist. It was minutes of torture but to Kylo it felt like seconds as he savoured every second of it. He watched with morbid satisfaction as blood dripped down Ren's mouth and his eyes rolled back into his skull. He enjoyed the way his heart was straining against the invisible force that was crushing it from within. Even with the rathtar he had shown more mercy but not with Ren, with him, he was determined to let him feel every second of his body slowly shutting down until death took him.

Giving its last jerks, Ren's body finally slumped down, useless. Kylo was looking down at the man, his hand balled up into a fist. Ren, the leader of the Knights of Ren was dead.

With his enemy now finished, Kylo finally allowed himself the chance to take a deep breath. Taking shaky steps back, feeling utterly drained from the fight, he clipped his lightsaber back on his belt.

It was over, Ren's been defeated now all he-

A sharp needle-like pain stabbed his brain causing him to fall on his feet, his hands grasping his head.

' _Well done Kylo Ren! You have defeated your enemy!"_ Kylo's hold on his head tightened, knowing full well who it was that was talking to him. " _Ren was a weakling, you have always been the true leader of the knight's of Ren. Join me, and I can show you your destiny, I can help you gain greater power!'_

Fear began to grip at his heart.

A few years ago he would have said yes, he would have done anything to stop the pain but not anymore. Kylo shook his head, his fingers grabbing on to his hair as the pain grew exponentially. He had never felt such pain.

"Foolish boy, it is your destiny to join me! You belong to the dark side, your very soul calls for it!"

Kylo shook his head once more, stubbornly. He couldn't join them, at that moment he didn't remember why but he knew he couldn't. At that Snoke grew angrier and angrier, and Kylo howled in pain. Tears streamed down his cheek, his face contorted in pain. He would lose, he knew it. He had before, he always lost to Snoke. Every time he refused to follow an order he would torture him until he gave in and did everything he asked. He thought that maybe after all these years he might have grown stronger but it seems he was a fool. Much like before, he would give anything to make the pain go away, anything.

Opening his mouth to say that he'll give in, to say that he'll do anything he asks, just let the pain stop, when something strange happened. The pain didn't go away, it was still very much there, hurting him, but in all his pain he could feel something else. He had no words to describe it. It was like a spark in all the darkness, so small he could barely see it, yet it was there, it's tiny whispers barely audible but somehow he managed to make out what it was saying.

" _Ben_."

Kylo froze, knowing who that voice belonged to.

The voice didn't say anything more, it just said his name and banished, but it was enough. With renowned strength, Kylo frowned in concentration and pushed against the darkness. It was no easy feat. His teeth grit to the point he thought they would pulverize. He put everything he had to push against the darkness. A few times he pushed and pushed, only for the darkness to shroud him completely but then he'd start from the beginning, again and again, not giving up. He couldn't give up, he refused to give up. He fought and fought until finally, he won.

His eyes flew open.

"Rey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright cool! so Ren's dead hurray! Now, I'll keep my mouth shut before I spoil anything!
> 
> Before I go though, a friend of mine that's helped me write this story is working on her own SW fan fiction. It's a werewolf AU if anyone's interested I'll give yall the link when it comes out!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading and commenting and see you guys next time!


End file.
